It’s The SUZYs! Announcing the 6th Annual DrSusanBlock.Tv Awards for 2017

Full transcript of It’s The SUZYs! Announcing the 6th Annual DrSusanBlock.Tv Awards for 2017 on The Dr. Susan Block Show:

Need to talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else? You can talk to us. I'm Dr. Susan Block, your mistress of the airwaves. But my day job is director of the Dr. Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts and Sciences, specializing in sex therapy over the phone.

Anytime you need to talk, whether you need serious psychotherapy or a hot phone sex experience or a combination, my world-renowned telephone sex therapists are just a phone call away. Totally private, absolutely confidential. We listen, talk with you, advise you, role-play for you, fantasize with you.

No fantasy is too taboo and help you with anything from impotence to exhibitionism, fears to desires, fetishes to marriages. For more information, call us at 213-291-9497. That's 213-291-9497 anytime you need to talk.

You're listening to Radio Susie One on the World Wide Web. And now, here she is, Dr. Susan Block. All you children of sex, and yes, we are all children of sex. With a capital X.

Can I get an amen? Can I get an A, women? A, women. I want to welcome you to the Susies.

Yeah. That's right. This is the sixth annual Susie Awards, the awards we give out on the last Dr. Susan Block show of 2017.

That's right, we give awards. Honoring broadcast artistry and sapiosexual exhibitionism and all kinds of good stuff in the field of sexuality, as well as honoring sexy people in all kinds of other fields.

So we're going to do that tonight. We're going to give out these awards. Me, that is, your darling doctor, your mistress of the airwaves, and your irreverent Dr. Susan Block of the Church of Bonoboville.

And here is my lovely assistant. If you are tuned in live, you can see her. This is Phoenix Dawn. That's right, and she is all set for the new year.

It's not quite the new year. I mean, this show isn't during like the new year. It's like it's at that point just before the point, you know, when you actually climax.

It's fun. It's a good place to be. It's getting yourself all ripped up for the new year. 2018 is coming, brothers and sisters.

Woo, are we ready? Woo, woo. I don't know. I don't know.

It's been a rough one this 2017. And yet it's been a great one. It's been really awesome and amazing and meaningful and galvanizing and hot and sexy.

Yes. But it's also been trying, which is why we have the Trumpus, right? You know, like Krampus, but Trumpus.

Okay, and he is wearing his devil ears and he is gagged for the new year weekend with a silvery gag, you know, not just his penis pacifier, which is, you know, kind of more appropriate to have stuck in his mouth

about the size of his. Pretty much talking to your microphone. That's a good girl. We might have to spank your happy new year if you

keep not talking in the microphone. Maybe we'll have to start out with that. All right. It is a happy new year and a happy new drear.

Turn around. Yep. Okay. And yes, we're going to start with the clothes

to rear because these are such beautiful clothes that Phoenix is wearing and whack for not talking on the microphone. Another one.

And another one for not talking on the other microphone. Okay. So here is our award.

Yeah, that's right. We only have one. It's, you know, a very nice kind of oscary looking award with wings.

And it is, it was, you know. They're flexible wings. Very. I just want to say.

Very flex. Yeah, they fly basically. Exactly. Flying, as Freud said, is a metaphor for sex

when you dream about it. When you dream about flying, you're horny basically. So, okay. So now we're going to put the hat on the statuette

because we have a safe sex policy on this show. So we even put condoms on our awards. And this is a glide American condom. Here we go.

And there she goes. Right. Okay. Just like that.

It's like a little hat. Right. Oops. Got to have balance.

Right. Like that. Yeah. It falls off sometimes, which is why we have other

condoms. Right. But there she is. She's got a hat.

Just like her mistress. Right. And wings, which I have, you know, in my dreams. And yeah, she's our girl.

She's our Susie award. And so, you know, we're about to give them out. And yeah, this is a show that we do every year that we don't invite anybody to basically

because, you know, it's the show between Christmas and New Year's. And it's kind of a time when a lot of people are busy and in any case, we're giving out awards.

Takes us the whole show to give out all these awards. That's right. We subscribe to the exact same thing that is getting the American educational system to be far behind

other Western countries and probably a lot of Eastern countries as well, which is the whole idea that everybody gets an award. Everybody's good, you know.

Everybody gets an A. Let me see. When I was going to school, it was a lot tougher. But now, you know, you want everybody to have self-esteem.

So we are going to give out a lot of awards. I'm just warning you guys. This is only for die-hard Dr. Susie TV fans. Everybody else, you can just watch something else.

But we are going to be showing some incredible clips from some of the greatest moments on the Dr. Susan Block Show live from Bonoboville during 2017.

Right, Captain Max? That's correct. Clips from the past. Clips from the past.

Very educational. How to get a blow job with so-and-so. And how to do anal sex with so-and-so. Wonderful clips.

How to ride the motor bunny. How to ride the bunny, of course. All of those. So we're going to have some exciting clips

and, you know, some hot photos too. And we've got Phoenix here. And Happy New Year. And probably I'm going to need some Bonoboville communion,

like let by halfway through when my voice gets tired of giving out all these awards. Okay, so, oh, I should also say

that you have to have been a guest on the Dr. Susan Block Show sometime during the... Yes, Chuck Lee is here.

Hello. Or you could pay me for the award. Right, you could actually bribe us. But basically you have to have been a guest

on the Dr. Susan Block Show sometime during 2017. Or a product, right? This is the era of corporations and products.

So you could be a product and win. So, you know, we do have products. And, yeah, staff technically can't win. Okay?

We don't give awards to staff except this year we have decided that everyone on the staff gets an award. So, that just kind of solves all of that.

And, no, you don't get this one. But you... Well, we have these buttons. And we didn't invite anybody.

So, you know... Our integrity. Did you get a button? Oh, you already got one. See, she's already got one.

So we might as well give some out to other people. But actually there are some people that are actually going to win an award that are in this room,

that are going to win a specific award. Staff just wins staff award. It's kind of... For excellence.

Maybe it wouldn't have wings, right? Yeah. But we have had some really, really amazing, unusual, exciting,

and sapiosexual people on this show. Wow, Max. That was quite a, you know, guttural moan,

I guess, okay. So, our first category is the Go Bonobos category, because this show is very bonobo. And we support the bonobos,

and we support people that support the bonobos. And the bonobos are the Make Love Not War chimpanzee that swing through the trees, as well as with each other.

They make peace through pleasure, and they empower the females. Very me too. But, me too, what's next, right?

What's the other part of female empowerment that keeps the bonobos peaceful? What is it? Who knows?

Maybe you'll win an award. Sex, right? Male well-being, right? Sex for everybody,

but, you know, if you just empower the females and you don't take care of the males, then, you know, I don't know what might happen. You've got to take care of it all.

So, bonobos show us the way, and they are highly endangered, of course, in this very ecocidal time, especially, not because of anything to do with their peacefulness,

but just because the rainforest is being devastated and they are being poached. So, we've got to help save them, and that's my soapbox I get on for go bonobos.

And, by the way, when you buy the bonobo way and put out actual shekels for it on Amazon, then a portion of the proceeds goes to actually helping to save the bonobos.

So, a couple of the organizations that are here on my awards list get some of that donation from you. So, first of all, the big award of the night,

the first award is most bonobo. Right, you should get a popper. Yeah, get a popper. Here we go. Okay.

So, I think because this is the first award of the night, and it is a big award. You don't know this gal, but you will meet her. You will love her.

She is really the winner of most bonobo. I don't know if anyone's going to argue with me about this, but it is. Are you ready? Riley Rays!

And there she is. There's a picture of her. Let's just look at that picture one more time. Excuse me, but she has a Hitachi magic wand inside of her vagina.

I love that. Now, a lot of us use the Hitachi, but it's for the outside. She got it inside.

She did a lot of other things. She did amazing twerking. She balanced... I don't remember what denomination,

but $100 bills, I'd like to say, on her nipples. And she spanked Trump. She also...

I gave it to him, Analy. And she loves the bonobo way. She actually gave it an endorsement. So, you know, she's a reader.

And we ran into her at Adult Con, as well as just love having her on the show. And so, Riley Rays, you are the most bonobo 2017,

the most bonobo guest on the Dr. Susan Block show, both in terms of your heart and your mind and your body, because the body is the temple of all that other stuff. And she's got a banging body, I gotta say.

And she's about as tall as you. And she does everything. She's a great dancer and just very bonobo, you know? I don't know if you should try this at home

with your Hitachi ladies. I don't want you to get it stuck in there. It's something you really gotta know how to do, okay? And she held her own when she was on the show

with the UCLA satire group. So, we love Riley Rays. Okay, she gets an award. And...

Boy, I can't talk this much about everybody. Okay. Most bonobo couple. Anybody want to take a stab at who that is?

You don't know them either, but you gotta know these people, right? Okay. And the envelope, please.

Danielle Watts and Chef B. Lai. Another popper, another popper. Just bring the whole bowl over. And let's just, you know, pop them out here.

Right, okay. Maybe this one will actually leave the popper. Okay, whoa, there we go. Okay, very good.

Okay, Danielle Watts and Chef B. Lai are two of our favorite guests. Look at them. They are just gorgeous.

And, you know, they're married. They've actually been together for a couple years now, I think. And we met them at our 24th wedding anniversary.

And they're just fantastic. And they are the most bonobo couple. So, that's what they win. Best bonobo conservation.

This is not as exciting in terms of pictures as the other ones, but very important in terms of love of the real bonobos in the wild. And first is Lola Ya Bonobo and Claudine André,

who are helping to save the bonobos from extinction. And they take care of bonobo orphans who are orphaned because their parents are shot by these terrible poachers, who a lot of them aren't terrible.

They're just uneducated or they're very poor. And anyway, our next winners of the Bonobo Conservation Award are the people of the Bonobo Conservation Initiative, which includes my old friend Sally Cox.

And Sally has been on the show, she hasn't been on lately, but the Bonobo Conservation Initiative is always on the show, and we always support them.

And our new Bonobo friends, who are the Bonobo Project, who gave me my bracelet, because they know what a bonobo I am. And we donate to all of them, and you should too.

So the Bonobo Project mainly helps to spread the word, just like we do, except they don't do it with all the sex. Right, yeah, well, yeah, it's a little different. Yeah, more serious.

We are, of course, more, I think, Bonobo, but we are, you know, kind of a little bit out of bounds for some people, so we appreciate that there are other people who are sort of spreading the word about bonobos.

And we just also spread the words that, hey, everybody, you know what makes bonobos so fantastic? Sex, right? That's what empowers the females,

that's what makes the males feel good, and that's what keeps the peace in Bonoboville. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

And by sex, we don't just mean penis and vagina, by the way. No. There's a lot of other kinds of sex, like the kind I saw last night

when you were biting the birthday girls' butt or whatever you were doing there. That's a kind of sex, I think. Right, she grew a mustache.

That's pretty sex. Right, okay, let me... Girl on girl. Oh, girl on girl.

There's a lot of girl on girl in Bonoboville. There is, it's a beautiful thing. It helps them to establish that female solidarity and there's a lot of boy on boy, okay,

in the real Bonoboville, and that helps the boys to stay calm. Right, tested time. Max, test your testes now.

I am testing. Test those testes. Testes. And by the way,

Bonobos have big balls, I'll tell you. They do. They do. They really do.

All right, so most... Oh, this one's kind of interesting. I wonder if we have a picture. Best Bonobo tattoo for Sebastian Walker.

Do we have that? Oh, okay, maybe not. He has a great Bonobo tattoo. Oh, there it is.

Look at that. Oh, yay. Oh, Harry. Harry Sapien.

We have to give him a hand right now. Yeah, he has been pulling some of these photos together. And it's amazing. But this is a beautiful,

that's a beautiful Bonobo tattoo of a real famous photo by Franz de Waal of two Bonobo females actually doing each other while one of them is looking at the camera

and the other one's looking at her partner. So, you know, Bonobos can be like humans too, you know. Different types of attention.

Okay, so now this award goes to Baby Block. It's kind of a sentimental award. And yes, Amore Hilton, who calls herself some other crazy name now.

I'm a Rooks. I still call her Amore Hilton. And she always gets the award. And she kind of complains except that,

yeah, that's her. She was on the show earlier this year. And she was adorable. And she does get most adorable.

And she's a, you know, a long time Bonobo. Bonobo female empowerment goes to Julie A. Burkhart, which was a little bit late. So we probably, oh, well we do have a picture

because Harry is awesome. And she runs Trust Women Foundation, which is a fantastic foundation that, that, wow, I haven't even had a chance to say what it is.

Thank you all for applauding. What it does is it supports women who need abortions. Basically, they have abortion centers in the Midwest where it's very difficult to get an abortion.

And so these ladies, they are very brave. And in fact, they realized that one of the best ways to fundraise was to go door to door. And it is a good way to fundraise.

It's also a good way to get yourself killed. So they are incredibly brave because they are determined to fundraise. So they are going door to door

and letting people see the human face of, you know, women's reproductive services. And it's called Trust Women Foundation. And so, you know, we support them and, you know,

they were here. So they're also part of the Bonobo Female Empowerment Group that we're a part of with Mal Jones. A lot of great women in that group.

Okay, so Bonobo, I mean, you know, I sometimes throw things into this category that I don't know what else to put. People that just, you know, I guess I love.

So best blast from the past. That would go to Janelle Hopkins and her family. And I understand, even though Miss Hopkins is not here tonight,

that her family members, John Clark and Derek Wilder, are here. So they can think about making a speech or actually, I think they just want to come forward

and make a speech. They're determined to do that. Not too long. We have a lot of awards.

We haven't even gotten to the porn people yet. But anyway, yeah. Are they going to give a speech? You can give one later.

Who's giving a speech? John and Derek, because they're here. John? Derek's mom, John's paramour,

Janelle, who used to be my assistant. She had your job. No way. In the 1980s, unbelievably, right?

I can't believe I had my job in the 1980s, but I did, right? Right? Okay.

So now you know. I should get an award just for lasting. Okay. We are going to hear from that Janelle Hopkins family.

Okay. Most Bonobo off-campus interview, Greg Friedman, inner journey. We love Greg.

And I don't know if we have a picture. There's Greg. He's a sweetie. He's a very Bonobo guy.

He does a two-hour interview. None of this like quicky 15-minute stuff you do. He just relaxes and really gets into the Bonobo way. We love you, Greg.

And we love Laguna Beach. And what is the name of that hotel? The Capri. The Capri Hotel.

We had a good time at the Capri. We love the Capri. We love the naked staff. Okay.

So, yeah. Staff award. We are giving the staff. Everybody on the staff gets a button.

It says I won a Susie, non-specifically. Okay. All right. So, now here's the category you've been waiting for.

Porn for the people. Sexiest sex icon. You should say this because you should know her name. Layla Sin.

Okay. And now let's have a popper. I say she's a sex icon because she is... Always representing penthouse.

She's a penthouse pet of the year. She's hot. And she's very hot. And there's another hot lady in that picture.

And her name is... Well, before I tell you her name, I'll tell you her award. Most multi-talented. Let's get a popper.

Most multi-talented. Christiana Sin. Well, that's why we got a lot of poppers. Right.

They're these hot girls. They're both from penthouse. And Christiana, wow. She sings.

She does splits. She twerks. She... Very diverse.

Yes. Oh, my God. She does so much. She did an erotic reading from a penthouse, a book of erotica.

And, yeah. I mean, Layla also did an erotic reading. Actually, Layla is very talented too. But I don't know.

They're both incredible. I had to give them both... I had to give them somewhat different awards. So, I did.

Sexiest sex icon, Layla Sin. Most multi-talented Christiana Sin. Hotest porn starlet. I'm going to let Phoenix read this one

because she knows this girl. Hotest porn starlet. Get it on the microphone. Hotest porn starlet.

Here, let me do this. Lexi Mansfield. How do you do this? It's hard, right?

Wait. This one's different. Where are the other poppers? Oh, those ones.

Lexi Mansfield, a.k.a. Lexi Girl. Yay, Lexi. Love you. She is really hot.

Look at her. She is the hottest porn starlet. Now, some say she should win for... She did do an incredible motor bunny ride.

Definitely that is part of what makes Lexi Girl the hottest porn starlet. That was hot. Smoky, anyway. I fixed it.

Yeah. What was that? That was one of the poppers that you bought. I thought we were being shot at.

Well, that's what fireworks are supposed to be like. They're rockets red glare. They're just peaceful, but they're loud, like artillery. Yeah, so Lexi Girl.

She's coming back in two weeks. We're excited to have Lexi Girl back. She is very versatile. We'll see who won the hottest motor bunny ride, though.

It's kind of a special ride. But Lexi, certainly, she did the motor bunny ride. She did the Christmas thing. She did the Bonoboville Communion thing.

She did everything. She was adorable. And so was her guy. I forget his name, but he's very nice.

Alan. Hi, Alan. Hi, Alan. Hot as porn starlet.

Okay. Hot as teen porn starlet. She can't win this next year. But Veronica Valentine is 19, and she is hot.

And there she is with gypsy. Whoa! And ecore. And, yep.

See, I told you we'd be using these poppers, right? Because a lot of them don't work. Veronica Valentine is another one who is very multi-talented and beautiful.

She's got that Elizabeth Taylor. Oh, that's a great shot. Naked look. You know, and she likes being choked.

And let me just say, do not try this at home. But a lot of hot girls like being choked. What can I say? You do.

I love it. Oh, my God. I love it. All right.

Well, I still say, don't try this at home. You know, take a class before you start choking your lover. Learn how to do it without killing them. Right.

I've, uh, yeah. I'm not going to get on my soapbox about that. Just don't do it unless you can take a class. Oh, well, consent.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

I should, I, I would say that goes without saying except nowadays you got to say it. Consent. Of course you can't choke someone without their consent.

Can I choke you? Can I choke you? All right. And a lot of girls love it.

Some guys too. Like a popper. Excuse me. I know we haven't known each other for very long.

Yeah, right. Can I choke you? I know guys that do that. Yeah.

We've had them on the show, but they're experts. They're experts. I think we have one out here. Oh, we do?

Yeah. A choker? Yeah. Okay.

Do I know him? Probably. Okay. Well, I don't, is he getting an award?

No. Oh, okay. I'm just mentioning. We just have a choker out in the,

Okay. Watch out girls. We have a choker in the bar. Okay.

Okay. Hottest cougar. Guess who gets that award. Well, you wouldn't know because you weren't here,

but anybody that was here would know that Sally Mullins has got to get the Hottest Cougar Award. She is such a cougar. I'm a very natural girl.

And hot, I guess, older than some people. Woman. and loves the younger guys, you know. All right, Sally, we want you back. And sexiest nerd, sexiest nerd. Okay, you weren't here, but she was adorable. She's got glasses and

guys make passes at this girl. This is the sexiest nerd, Gracie Mae Green. Also her name includes, you know, Green. Eco-sexuality. Right. And look at her. Look at her with her pants and everything. And then you see her ass. Yeah, she's got a great bang and little body. Yeah, very, very adorable and nerdy. Definitely the sexiest nerd. Okay,

now we come to the moment you've all been waiting for. The hottest motor bunny ride. And we are going to see a clip of Alex Moore, giving us more than we could ever hope for. Do we have the clip? Here we go. Oh, we have a clip now. Thanks to Mar and Gideon. She's got a jewel in her butt. This is why they call it a bunny.

And she rides. Okay, so now we're going to turn you around. And she's coming all over the place. She's so into it. She's genuine. Right. We want to turn her around. We want to see her. Oh, I think we're at that stage. Wow. Look at how beautiful. We have a towel under you. Okay, so then a leakage. Wow.

I mean that liquid you talked about. Wow. She does work. I mean this is just a test. No, we love it. Don't stop. Don't stop at yourself. We love it. Okay, you know, it really looks like when you really need a round of applause, when you really need a second round. She is over your big fat ego. Wait, that's another clip. One clip at a time.

Hold on. Hold on. Now my voice is very loud. Okay, so you understand now why Alex Moore won the motor bunny ride. She was amazing with the jewel in her butt and the motor bunny attachment, the biggest one. She used the biggest attachment and she, you know, just rode it. Right. She killed it. She killed it. She rode it. Reverse

you know, pubic art shaving job. Whoops. The hat fell off. Okay, so where is my, oh, here it is. Okay. Alright, so now, cutest porn starlet. Okay, Kenzie Reeves. She looks about that. Look at how tiny she is. Look, you know how little I am, right? So look at that picture again. There she is. She's so tiny. She is a little thing. But she is over 21, I think,

or 20 or maybe, I don't know. She didn't do Bonoboville communion. That's right. She didn't receive because I think she is 20 or something. But yeah, she is so tiny. You can put her in your pocket. Yeah, she's the cutest porn starlet from Florida. And sexiest trans performer, Courtney Van Wales. I don't know if we have her. There she is. Courtney Van

Wales. She was on a show with Veronica Valentine. Yes, she's hot. Look at her. Oh my God, I love that shot. Yeah, she's got that Jackie going down on her. Yeah, she performed alright. Yeah, chick with, yeah, okay. Never mind. I don't think that's politically correct for me to say that, but you all know what I was going to say, so I didn't say it. Anyway, sexiest trans

performer, Courtney Van Wales. Sexiest surprise. Okay. This one, you know. And I don't think you really know how much of a surprise she was though. Christine's a months taking pictures before she broke out and released her inner bonobo on the Dr. Susan Block show. And wow, Christine is a star. So she was a surprise to all of

us. And we are excited to have more and more of Christine through 2018. Because she's also a member of the bonobo family. Yeah, so okay. Okay, so now I'm giving an award funniest sex icon to Ron Jeremy. And yes, Ron's going through some tough times right now. Me too movement is after him and as well they should be he does

too much grabbing. It's true. He's a grabby guy and we always police him here at the Dr. Susan Block show. And we make sure he doesn't grab, you know, but I mean, I hope he survives. I think he'll survive this negativity. And it's a good spanking for him. But but we love Ron. I've known him for many decades. I'm

not defending him grabbing unconsensually, you know, if he did that. But I do want to give him a shout out. He's done a lot of shows with us this year. He's been great. And we love him. And we we support him as a comedian and as a musician. And there he is at our our 25th wedding anniversary. You know, he would

come to special occasions. He's now laying low because he's got his problems. You know, he's basically the Harvey Weinstein of porn. No, he's not that bad at all. Not at all. More like maybe the garrison Kyler of porn. Really, like that, you know, I put his hand on her back under crotch. I'm sorry. Okay, you

don't want it. Okay, I'll go with this one. Yeah, I mean, listen guys, you got to behave. There's no question. And one of the reasons we want to make, we want to make prostitution decriminalized and destigmatized is for the sake of sex work, but also to keep guys from going after women that don't want it. And

just because you're in porn doesn't mean that you want it anytime anywhere. Okay, that doesn't mean that, guys. But ladies of me too, you know, follows a bonobo way, male well being is important too. And female empowerment can't let it go. Can't let the backlash happen. I mean, it probably will, but we've got to try to

fight it. Okay, so in the funny category, funniest former porn star is Amanda Blow. See, Ron is still a porn star, so he's not a former porn star. Amanda has supposedly quit porn, but she is, she came here to give, actually, she was here on my birthday, and she gave Chef Bee Live a blowjob. There she is, Amanda

Blow doing what she does best, giving a blowjob. Yeah, and that's Danielle Brian's, or Chef Bee Live's wife, who looks as excited as all get out. And she is, she really genuinely is. They're very poly sensual, that's how they like to describe it, poly sensual. And so they love it, former seventh day

Adventists, both of them. So, and that's Amanda Blow giving her specialty to Chef Bee Live on my birthday, and I'm sitting there with Christiana Sin. Alright, and let's see, where are we? Funniest, oh no, no, wait a second. Wildest trans performer, Kristen Craves. Yeah, she's wild. And she was giving lots of

blowjobs, actually, I mean, she was doing all kinds of stuff. You just have to, you know, log into DrSusanBlock.tv to see how wild Kristen Craves can get. Okay, and funniest porn legend, this is, you know, from our trip to the Cupcake Theater, remember Max? We went to the Cupcake for the porn legends, legends

of porn. A lot of your contemporaries, mine too. We're getting old. Okay, so Ginger Lynn, who was in Taboo Four, which actually I was a, just a, I played myself as a radio host. And there's Ginger Lynn with me. And she is hilarious. So she gets funniest porn legend. She is really, really, she

could do stand up. Okay, now this is from the same, yeah, sure. Ron is on the phone. Ron Jeremy. Hey, Ron Jeremy. Put in a speaker. Okay. Hi, Ron. You just won an award. You won a Susie award. You what? You, John, no, this is not John. This is not your, okay, he just hung up. He thinks I'm you. That's

why he hung up because if he knew it was me, he wouldn't have done it. All right, okay, it's okay. All right, John, John, Ron. Now where was I when you interrupted with a non-call? Okay, well, Ron was there. And now we are going to give a really kind of cool award. Best George Bush Senior Me Too

Story, okay? Rhonda Joe Petty. She told hers on my show when I did the interview over at the Cupcake Theater for the Golden Age of Porn Legends. And she was a Golden Age of Porn Legend herself. And George Bush Senior tried to pick her up. And she wouldn't have it though. She was more interested in the Kentucky

Derby actually. But he did, you know, try his best, even since Secret Service Agents with his hotel room key. Okay, she still has it as proof. Yeah, the hotel room key. Okay, so where am I here? Oh, Best Porn Golden Age Memorabilia, Penny Antene. Penny Antene. Yeah, yeah, we love Penny Antene. We also have some of

her photographs hanging here. Oh, yeah, there she is. She's the one that you can hardly see next to Ginger Lin. That's Penny Antene. And those are her, maybe that's some of her stuff in the back. Anyway, she's a great photographer. We have a lot of photos of hers, black and white photos from the Golden Age of

Porn. Okay, now, here's an award for another person who was at that event and who has been doing a lot on our Facebook, which is best porn activist Melissa Hill. And she runs something. I forget the name of it. Jesus. Well, that's what happens when you have so many porn awards. But anyway, she

runs some kind of a self help group, but you know, a group for porn stars to help each other, right? They meet. They talk about it on my speakeasy group on Facebook. So, and she was a good interview. So best blast from the past producer is David Bertolino because he produced that thing. Right. He did a

great job. It was fun, right? Okay, best corn to porn star. Okay, and actually she created her title because she said it on the show. And it was so funny that I had to make it a title. And that's Rachel Cavalli brought by E Cor the Wolf. Okay, and best hottest buns. Yeah, Lonnie legend. Our girl Lonnie. I

don't know if we have her buns there. Maybe not. Oh, no. Okay, we have her buns. Well, that's sort of her ass right there. She's, oh, there's nice ass right there. There we go. Yeah, some Lonnie buns, hottest buns. Yeah, getting her books banking. Okay, and we have best bitch. Okay, y'all know who that is. Best

bitch. Betsy the dog. Look at Betsy. Is she a show dog or what? She is this total show dog. By the way, I can't tell what time it is. My excellent engineer and technical director Abraham did fix the time. So 1122. 1122. Okay, so I've got like 10 minutes. Okay. Okay, so let's see. So Betsy the dog. Yeah, we got that.

So now we're up to another category. Do we have any more pompers? The category is close to my heart because it's about talking. It's a it's a small category. Let's talk sex. Okay, proper. Okay, so sexiest sex therapist is Dr. Laurie Bennett cook. There she is. She's showing she can talk and she can spank.

She's a sexy sex therapist. She got her agua lay. I think she yeah, she did been a bubble community too. She was real cool. And sexiest documentary filmmaker is Mashumi ghost. She is the maker of temples and brothels which I am in and it's a very cool film about sex and religion as well as about sex work and yes, yes, the decriminalization

of sex work. So let's see. So sexiest filmmaking couple. This is the makers of sticky the movie Nicholas Tana and Denise Acosta. There they are. Right. Yeah, he insisted on waterboarding her himself. He wanted to do that. So I said, all right. That was the night that half it was right after half died. So I was wearing a captain's

hat in his memory. Right. Okay, so let's see. Best sex and medicine activist Anita Teresa Boninger. I guess she's our really our only sex and medicine activist. But anyway, she got that. Okay, most sapiosexual polyamorous. Now she the most sapiosexual polyamorous and there she is with her book. She is a cutie. Yeah.

And she's an author. And now we are back to the legends. But this is kind of a sexologist that Max knows and that actually got her started on her post porn art career. And she gets an award for dirtiest legend. Dr. Annie Sprinkle. Because I did a little interview with her when we were at the legends thing. And she also gets for most eco sexual power couple, Dr. Annie Sprinkle and Beth

Stevens. There they are. And best sex geek that word my microphone. Oh, there it is. Heather Nookie claws. Heather Nookie claws. There she is. Okay. Okay, now how much time do we have? I can't see that. There's no three minutes. Okay, so we're going to go into BDSM and kink. And yeah, we've got a lot of

more awards here. So most distinguished femdom is a big award and very important woman is getting it Mistress Cyan. Yeah. And there she is. If you're watching, she is on the Dr. Susan Block shows Luper Calia or Valentine Luper Calia celebration. And there she's whacking like three people. Uh, yep, Mistress Cyan and hottest femdom couple Mistress Cyan and goddess Genesis.

They win an award. They just got married and they are the directors of sanctuary. And yeah, they just got married. So we wish them all the best and we've given them an award for hottest femdom couple and our sexiest femdom. Well, you know, there's a lot of contenders for this this award, but we had to give it to Madam Raven Ray. Okay, people here don't know Madam Ray.

She's amazing. All right, Madam Raven Ray. Yeah, we're going to show a clip from her Spanx giving with Trump over here. That ego. Oh, oh, maybe we're showing it now. We are. He does have a strong. A glazed turkey. Basting this turkey.

Hmm. Yes, actually, there's several Susie award winners in this. She is a brave there is Madam Raven Ray making sure giving it to him looks at the camera because, you know, we're going to use this. We're giving this to Mueller. She's going in. Who's going to get this wet? And guess what? The orange menace. He loves it.

He's an actor. He's a model. He's a model. He hates Trump as much as we do. Okay. Well, anyway, there's a few winners in that clip, but Madam Raven Ray is right in there with her strap on. That was her birthday. I gave her a strap on for her birthday and she certainly put it to good use immediately on our Trump surrogate that night for Spanx giving.

We stuffed the Trump turkey good. Well, so yes, we are, you know, we celebrate the holidays. We love to celebrate the holidays here on Dr. Susie dot TV. And we are going to do some more celebrating. Do I have time to give out a few more awards? Okay. Sexiest senior femdom is Cherie Rose who is here. Hanukkah actually there she is. Yeah, yeah, you know her. That's right. That's right.

There she is. Awesome. Cherie Rose. She is the sexiest senior femdom. She is the senior of the femdoms. Really? She was femdom and when I didn't even know what femdom and was. Let me just say that. She's been doing it a long time. And her partner also wins an award. Most well rounded kinkster. This is a very special award. The most well rounded kinkster. And you can take that as

the double entendre that it is. And it goes to the fabulous Rhiannon Arons. She is a great kinkster, very well rounded in the titty department. Of course riding the Sybian as well as an MFA. She just got her masters of fine arts from Long Beach, whatever, university. And that night I was hitting her with a baguette for Bastille Day. Right? You know, we celebrate the holidays. Yeah, very French.

Very French. So we celebrated hitting her with a baguette. And there she is. And she is just amazing. I just love Rhiannon. And she was just here last week for Christmas. And thought of new ways to wear candy canes around her tits. Amazing. And she is a real life milf. I mean, could give her best milf award, really. I don't know. I could give her a lot of awards. But we came up with

well rounded kinkster for this year. Another person I could give a lot of awards to, but we're going to give her best animal play, because that is her specialty. And that is Madame Marguerite. We love Madame Marguerite and hope to see her soon. And there she is with one of her animals. There she is with several of her animals. She has brought menageries to

the Dr. Susan Block show. This is Madame Marguerite. And she really brings the Commedia into Commedia erotica. She's also very, very funny. She has great jokes on Twitter. So you should follow her on Twitter, Madame Marguerite. Best fire play dom. Do I have time to play this? No. Okay, I'm not going to give this out yet. Then, okay, we'll hold on.

Break. Whoa, I've got a couple of them that I think have clips in a row. Geez. So what should we do? Should we take a break now? We could. Okay, so we're going to take a break. We're going to be back with some really exciting clips from some of our best shows, fire play and flogging with electric whips that light up. Oh my God, it's so much fun.

And Gordy, the Gord, you have to see Gordy in action. Gordy. Yeah, he wins. Well, you'll see. Gordy. Gordy. Gordy. Gordy was big. Definitely a big guy. Organic. Very, very organic. Clemmie could eat him. You know, I'm sure. You know, that would be okay. Be on her list. And yeah, you know. Organic for you. All right. So we're going to be right back. Me and Phoenix

Dawn are here for you. And this is the Dr. Susan Block Show, Sixth Annual Susie Awards. And so, you know, we've still got a lot of awards to give. We've still got quite a few clips to share. So don't come yet. And don't go away. We'll be right back. Hi, I'm Dr. Susan Block. And I've just written a new book called The Bonobo Way, inspired by my love for the make love not war

great apes. You know, the ones who have a lot of sex in a bonobo sutra of positions, including face to face. But it's not just how bonobos have sex. It's how they use sex to prevent murder and war. Really. They're the only great apes that have never been seen killing each other. They practice what I call peace through pleasure. With the females gently dominating the very happy,

very sexually satisfied males. Bonobos are special, partly because they just are. And partly because they're very, very close to us, almost 99% genetically similar to us. When it comes to being human, even being humane, bonobos can teach us so much, which brings me to us and more specifically to you. Is your inner bonobo longing to swing free? Would you like to tap into the hot natural sex

energy within you? Bet you would. So you can better enjoy the pleasures in life and cope with the pain. You know, the pain and have more orgasmic, organic, sustainable sex. Who doesn't want that? Greater lust, greater trust and better anger management. And who couldn't use a little bit of that these days. So get the book Learn the Bonobo Way. You'll be glad you did. Then you'll

want to join Bonoboville, a new global village for bonobo lovers and friends. And one last thing, the real bonobos are highly endangered. So a portion of all book sales go to bonobo conservation groups working to save the wild bonobos from extinction. Read the bonobo way and learn why this could be the most important

eco-sexual movement of our times. And improve your love life. And sisters, we are going to have a Sybian ride for Massive Amos. So you've never been on a Sybian before? No, I've never been on one before. Okay. Now you are ready to ascend the throne. Mr. Tracy, you are going to ride God's machine now. Put one leg right here,

put the other right here and just position yourself comfortably. Put your clip right here. Okay, so here she goes. Uh-oh. It's mounting the Sybian. Have you ever ridden a Sybian by the way? Oh, I have. Many a time. My favorite horse to ride. It's my best. Have Sybian yoga and experience it to the fullest.

Oh, go for the G-spot, go for the clip, go for whatever works. Someone can come from their nipple. We've got for Jim Rado, riding the Sybian. Whoa, holy shit. That does the job. Yeah, it's doing it. Sybian strikes again. Yes, I do say that when it feels good. Live on DrSuzi.tv from the womb room in Bonoboville.

Ride on cowboy. Take a deep breath. We never get tired of watching a pretty girl on the Sybian celebrate and masturbation, mom. That is a beautiful thing. Thank you, Dr. Susan Block. You're a wonderful human being. Wonderful human being, Dr. Susan Block.

I think we have orgasm, Houston, and let's have a hand. We have lift-off. We have lift-off. Okay, we're going to go, we're going to go. Testify, sister Kenny. Testify, that you masturbate.

Hey, man. How was it? What's your report? My vagina's so tingly right now, it feels like pop rock. I'm just going to take this home. I think it's bigger than your little body. That is the best product endorsement I've ever seen.

Can I leave now? Like, I'm ready. I'm one. Where's the husband? You got the Sybian. You don't need the husband. Oh, my God. No matter, fall over.

Hey, darling girl. I love you. I love you. That's my girl. And now, here she is, Dr. Susan Block. We are back with a happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you. I'm not the birthday girl. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you. Yes. Miss Clemmie, happy birthday. Wait, wait. You have to say a few words.

You have to say a few words. I want to thank mainly Phoenix last night for the non-consensual Harvey Wein staining on me. See, there we go. Look at that.

Look at that. All right. Submit your complaint to the board. To the management. Sorry, I couldn't help myself.

You know, personnel. I can see that. Happy birthday, Clemmie. Clemmie makes our banners with no R on the end.

Banners. And our pies, right? And she made a dick cake and tit cake last night. We were almost going to have a tit cake for her birthday.

But the raccoon got it. Raccoon. That raccoon again. But we ate the dick cake.

Dirty raccoon. That dick was really good. The dick was good. The dick was good.

And ate the tit cake. All right. Well, we need some sploshing over here. So we're going to need some of that cake.

There's two beautiful breasts. Two beautiful breasts and a raccoon just took a handful. Just like those tiny little hands, just like Trump. That was actually really a Trump surrogate.

Tiny little hands. So, okay. He is like a raccoon. Do I have, do we have no more paparazzi?

There's juxtapes, all right. Okay. So we are back to giving out awards here. And, wait, I got to get him.

Where's his devil horns? They are not on him. So we are going to give an award to, yes, indeed, to the best ass here.

And a little juxtapes leather finger flogger. And speaking of flogging, oh, no, that's not yet. Next is Best Fireplay Themdom.

Goddess Soma Snake Oil. And her best, she also her assistant won for Best Fireplay Submissive. That's Ms. Antoinette.

And we are going to now see a little clip of their fireplay. Hollywood Jake. Oh, yeah. It was a switch, but she's very submissive in this position, right?

With the goddess, right? Goddess Soma. Yeah. Oh, is that making your nipples hard?

Rubbing that ice on your nipples? Great tits, too. Yeah. And that's her slave?

She is more of an assistant who is submissive to Goddess Soma, although she's not submissive to very many other people, if anyone. And we've known Goddess Soma for years.

Make it a little less fiery, but it's still pretty fiery. Do not try this at home, either. Okay. Don't turn your lover into flambé.

Okay. And don't do it in a latex dress like she is doing it. She's doing a dangerous thing here with the latex dress, but she knows what she's doing.

That's right. That was Captain Max's birthday and the Bonobo Way anniversary and Goddess Soma snake oil turned Miss Antoinette into a birthday candle for you. And there's a Jux Lee picture of Goddess Soma and her fire.

Yes. And so let's see. The most imaginative femdom goes to Mistress Porcelain Midnight. There she is looking hot.

Whoa. What's going on back there? Quiet down. Pipe it down.

This is an awards show. Get it together. We have to honor and respect the award winners. These are the losers back there that didn't win anything.

They're jealous. That's right. They're jealous. They're the haters.

They're just trying to distract from these winners. All right. So let's see. I guess I have another video or should I do a few more

pictures before I do the next video? Can I do that? Yeah, do it. I can't.

Well, they don't respond to me. Six of you. Yes. Okay.

So we're going to give Best Male Flogger to Serpent. Serpent. Serpent. Like Serpent.

Right. There he is with his. He has all these women and he flogs them. Wow.

He's a good flogger. Mistress Porcelain Midnight also wins Best Bonobo Way Books Banking. Okay. She always does great Bonobo Way Books Banking.

And there she is dressed as a nun doing it. I love the outfit. She's really into the Bonobo Way Books Banking. She actually does them even better than me.

You know. Okay. Hottest Findom. You know what a Findom is, boys?

Hang on to your wallets. She'll get them. Goddess Virgin. Woo-hoo.

She is hot. She's adorable. She's a virgin, I guess. I don't know.

She says she is and I believe her. And she is, you know, very compelling. She's also very Bonobo. She could have won most Bonobo Books if she doesn't have any sex,

so she can't. Oh yeah, I get it. She's very into the whole Bonobo Way thing, but she's a virgin.

She's very Catholic in addition to being a dominatrix. And her slaves are very obedient. She's like really a nun, then. You know, I don't know.

That's her story and she's sticking to it. Yeah, I love it. Okay, most tantric Femme Dom, very tantric. Tantra is a kind of BDSM thing these days.

The former mistress Nicolette, now goddess Nicolette. I don't know if we had a picture of her. But no, we didn't get one. All right, Freaky is Femme Dom.

She was Freaky. Madame Rose, she had a bat that she hit her submissive with. She was pretty freaky, right? Yeah, see that.

Okay, and there she is going down on slave Mepenzi, submissive Mepenzi. You know, she was freaky. She was cool. From Sanctuary.

We love Sanctuary. Okay, best gender bender. And I got in trouble for using this phrase about somebody else, and it was politically incorrect,

but I checked with the person who is winning this award and he, she is happy with being a gender bender. And this is China Dahl, the former Jay Turico, who always dresses like a girl, but sucks her own cock.

I mean, what can you say? That's a cock. And he, she is sucking it with her panties down around her ankles. So is that a, that's a gender bender in my view, anyway.

I think it is, too. Okay, thank you. Best submissive, this goes to Mepenzi Barbie. She is just amazing.

Here she's doing a forced motor bunny ride with a Hitachi while she's tied up. She also did these other really submissive things. And we found a piece of a magician's card in her pussy.

Yes, the missing piece we found in the Penzi's pussy. Okay, most amazing breasts. I mean, I could have said just largest. I just called them amazing.

They are 42J and they are Switch M. Let's see them. I hope we have a picture of them. You got to see them.

Look at those, like gigantamas, okay. And they're natural. They're all natural? Oh yeah.

Oh yeah. She's a big girl. She is a big girl. She is from Sanctuary and she is 42J.

Okay. And look at me going, oh my lordy lady. Look at those. I'm just going crazy.

Just looking at them. Wow. I think I did Bonoboville Communion off of them. Are you serious?

Oh yeah. You know, amazing. Okay, best Kimbaku bondage, Professor Oni. He was the only Kimbaku bondage.

Professor Oni, yeah. Yeah, you know him. Oh, okay. You can read this one.

Best Kimbaku model. All right. Best Kimbaku. Kimbaku model is Lola Fey.

Lola Fey. Yeah. Okay. Same girl.

She had the best dress ever on. Yeah. That was a cute dress. Yeah.

Yep. And she didn't win for that though. She won for being a Kimbaku model, which includes putting tape on her nipples, which was cute.

It was cute. Okay. Some people might have to leave the room here. Surprise party girl.

Elizabeth Aston. There she is. Surprising. Is that?

No, wait. She's not in that picture. Oh no, she is. Oh yeah, she is.

No, she's there. There she is. There she is. There she is.

Yep. That was quite a surprise. And she was quite a party girl that night. Indeed, that was a surprise.

That was. Not expecting that. Sexiest Betty Page. Lookalike Tamora Betty.

Let's see. Is this a picture where she looks like Betty Page? Not really. But she's hot.

Anyway, she's hot. Okay. How much time do we have? We have my clock stopped.

My watch is not working. Okay. Do I have time to do a Bonoboville communion? Because I feel like I need to lubricate my larynx.

Always. Okay. We're parched. Right.

We're parched. Okay. So. How long do we have?

What time is it? Anybody know? 11.53. 11.55.

Aha. You have five minutes. What do you mean I have five minutes? Really?

I can't go into overtime? Yeah, you can. A little bit. Well, what is a little bit?

Well, just go. We'll see what a little bit is. Okay. Well, should I do a Bonoboville communion?

Sure. Go ahead. All right. How many more nominations do you have?

I have a few more. Not too many. Like what, 100? No.

I have about 20. 20. Okay. I could go through them faster.

Yeah, go through them faster and then we'll do communion 10. And then what we should line up is our best flogger. Actually, let's show that now while we're getting our communion stuff ready. Best flogger is female flogger, is goddess phoenix, and best floggy is Miss Joy Luck.

So we've got that, right? Oh, yeah, we do. Yummy. A little bit of sting, like spice in your enchilada.

Yeah. Cayenne pepper. Or this is more like your taco, really, than your slid. She's very warmed up.

You know, the Sybian can be a warm-up device. Although for most people, it's, you know, the end result. The finishing, not the start of the wall. Yeah.

Look at that. Final frontier. Beautiful. But getting just starbursts.

Yeah, nice. All right, let's hear it for goddess phoenix. And Miss Joy Luck, the winners of Best Flogger and Floggy. And we're going to do a little bonobovo communion.

We're going to make it quick. Me and Phoenix, you know, it's the eve of New Year's Eve, I know. It's like, Saturdays are falling at weird times this year. It's like one of those years.

So I being the older will take first from you, the altar. Okay. Okay. And the altar, you're very tan.

Wow. Are your boobs as tan as you? Oh yeah, no tan lines. Okay.

And glitter. I think I'll get some glitter in my mouth here. But that's okay. Okay.

And yes, I love, remove Trump Pence right by the nipple like this. Okay. Move Trump Pence. Wine, you want vino?

White? For you, white? Okay. Look at this.

These boobs are framed. Okay. Okay. And prepare the altar here.

I think you should wear your tat for this. This is my New Year's communion. All right, here, I'll get it. That glitter is delicious.

Glitter goes with salt. Yeah. Beautiful. All right.

And now, make sure the hat is on here. And now, where is my little award? See, we have these cute little trophies. Okay.

You can pour this into my water-boarded mouth. Beautiful. All right. Happy New Year.

And happy New Year. I think we should do a New Year. Happy New Year. Happy New Year.

All right. Family values. Definitely. All right.

Would you like to partake, my dear? All right. You can just hold the salt. And I'll hold the boob.

Lick, lick, lick. And salt, salt, salt. Feels so good. Oh, yeah, baby.

But Nobleville communion for New Year's. The eve of New Year's Eve. And the Susie Awards. All right.

And we are going to waterboard you, baby. And yeah, we've got these cute little trophies as shot glasses. Very cute. Okay.

Moving right along with our awards. We are going to give, okay, we did that. Arts and media. Most artistic asshole.

This woman actually draws with her asshole. And that is Catherine Imperio. The amazing Catherine Imperio. Most artistic asshole.

She is the anal artist, and she does draw with a Sharpie, and she makes these things. You can see them hanging in the gallery. That's amazing.

And here we have one, too, in the bar. And of course, the best asshole's assistant is Samantha Fairley, because she holds the paper so beautifully. Oh, yes, she's created.

And best iguana goes to Mercury, because, you know, we had to give their iguana an award, since we gave Betsy an award. Look at that iguana.

It's quite something. Okay. Continuing with art. Sexiest art curator goes to Keith Ward, you know,

because I think he was the only art curator that we have. So he was the sexiest. Hottest true confessions, Danielle Watts. Danielle is quite the confessor.

Here she is confessing to her priest, Rabbi, and Emon at once. Okay. Sexiest shipwreck sailor. That's just kind of a silly name for it.

But he looked like a sailor with a cast on his arm. Chef Beeline. Anyway, I don't know if we have... Oh, there he is.

Oh, there he is. Where's the cast? Is the cast on his arm? Well, he's in the sailor thing.

Oh, there's the cast. Yeah, there it is. Best hairstylist, Mark Brown. That's my hairstylist.

He didn't do my hair tonight, you could tell. Best latex dress. Okay. I got my latex to shout out here.

Mademoiselle Elo is my blue dress. And best latex. Cat suit. Demasque.

I love that one. Oh, that's the blue dress. I know it. I love that one.

So hot. So hot. That was what I wore at Adult Con. I am with Alex Moore in Gypsy.

And there I am in the cat suit made by Demasque, which is awesome. Oh my God, that's amazing. And that is with Raven Ray and somebody else.

And so, yeah, they win for best latex cat suit, best hemigonic cat suit. And best latex accessories catalyst. I had some really cool accessories with catalyst.

I don't know. Are they there? Oh, there you go. Well, that's not me, but that's okay.

Yeah, they have a lot of cool stuff. And so, yeah. Okay, best hula hoop artist, Shelby Mullen. Yep.

Maybe we have her. Shelby Mullen doing her hula hoop thing. She's great. We got to have her back.

Okay, sexiest magician. Yeah, you're going through these. So you see who we have to have back this year. Exactly.

Okay, this is her man, Jack Murdock. He's a sexy magician. And he's the one who hid a piece of a card in the Penzi's pussy.

Seriously. Without grabbing her by the pussy, by the way. He didn't have to do that. He just somehow got this piece.

I don't know how. I don't know if he worked it out with her. If so, she didn't tell. Or if he did a sleight of hand up the pussy.

But it was amazing. Okay, sexiest author. He's going to love this. I'm sure he doesn't expect to get this.

Well, maybe he does. Mike Maranacci. There he is. I know.

You don't necessarily see it. But it was a very sexy show. And he is now on our banner for Go Bonobos in 2018. By the way, that is my big epic essay

that is on my blog right now. So you got to go read it. Okay, it's a lot of words, right? And it's all about how we kind of made it through 2017.

And we need to go bonobos in 2018. And yes, the earth is being decimated. And war is on the horizon. And there are a lot of problems.

But we just got to keep going bonobos. And a lot of it is doing a lot of good. And you never know. We could just turn that tide and turn humanity

into a bonobo-esque society. Because guess what? If we don't, we're doomed. We're doomed.

We're doomed. We're going to blow ourselves up. We're going to ecocide ourselves out. So we've got to go bonobos to go forward.

Okay. Where are we? Arts and media. Okay.

Sexiest author. And he wrote the Jesus book. It was, you know, I think Jesus is sexy. I'm sorry.

California Jesus. California Jesus. You know, especially California Jesus is sexy. And a lot of those people in that book

were having some crazy sex. Amy Semple McPherson is one of my role models. Okay. Best jewelry maker.

Guess who this is? Okay. Max. Shelby Delaney.

Your girl. Who makes the vulva jewelry that we now sell. Hint, hint. You know, there's a little bit of bribery going on here.

So, you know, you should buy yourself or your honey a vulva necklace for Valentine's Day. It even begins with a V. Okay.

Valentine, vulva. You know, it's a natural. Okay. Most vibrant.

I just gave her this award. Shamanatrix, Missy Galore. We just, I just like her a lot. There she is being vibrant on our anniversary.

Okay. So now we are moving into the category of music. We don't have a lot of awards for this category because we haven't had a lot of different musicians.

But we have had a lot of music. Yes. And most of it is thanks to the winner of Hottest Hip-Hop Artist.

Yes. Igor the Wolf of Canoboville. I think he's actually in the house. The wolf is in the house.

Yeah. I think he, so this is his second award, but he won something different last year. I think I gave him Sexiest Rapper.

But now he is Hottest Hip-Hop Artist because there's a difference, right? Exactly. There is a difference.

I'm not even going to try to explain that difference. Okay. And the best singer, just a singer because Igor kind of sings, but he kind of, what is it?

I don't know. It's a rap thing. But let's just say the best singer was a girl that he brought named Jezebel Sweet.

And she's so sweet. She's going to come back on the show. And she was singing, look at her there with her guitar. She's doing acoustic guitar.

And she used to be a stripper, or she is a stripper. I don't know. She's kind of a part-time stripper, part-time singer, or something like that.

She mixes it up a little bit. She does. And she was singing with the guy Corey Feldman. Right.

And oh my goodness, she has some stories to tell us about Corey Feldman when she comes on the show in a few weeks. So I'll just leave that there.

Best song, Carmina Formosa. AI, the kingster. Woohoo, we love the kingster. And I think they won most Bonobo song last year.

So this year it's best song. Okay, best pianist. No, I didn't say pianist. I said pianist.

And he was playing earlier in a successful attempt to influence the judges. And that would be Norrie Carter. Yay, Norrie.

Yay, Norrie. I think he's somewhere here. Okay. Best product.

Okay. Agua, Cocoa Leaf Lecker. Wins for Best Liquor. Okay.

And more products. Best Leather. Jux Leather. Okay, let's whack that award now.

Spank it. Spank that award. Jux Leather, who happens to be shooting pictures right now, but he makes a lot of our...

Vloggers. Vloggers and slappers and spankers and things. And, you know, we're going to hear more about those things soon. So let's see.

Oh, and it just so happens that the president of Jux Leather gets another award for Best Aphrodisiac, cannabally cookies. Cannabally cookies. And those cookies were given to us the other day.

Did you have one of those cookies? Oh my God. Whoa, Christmas cookies this time. That's why you attack Lemmy.

Oh, you're going to blame those. Yeah, I'm going to blame them. Okay, okay, okay. Be careful when you eat these cookies.

They're really, really good. Okay, cannabally cookies and Best Sex Educational Puppet is for the nth time, the vulva puppet, the wondrous vulva puppet. And I've only got one more page of awards.

Best condoms, of course, we have one of them on here. Do we have the package? Oh, here we go. A sort of an open kind of package.

Glide. Wins the Best Condom Award. And they are all vegan condoms, so Lemmy can eat them. You could make a condom cake.

You could put a condom on your next penis cake and eat the condom too. That's a great idea. See, Lemmy? Okay, hottest new sex toy, motor bunny.

Okay, we saw that. We know why. Okay, most orgasmic sex toy, I hate to say this, but it is still the Hitachi Magic Wand. And best classic orgasmic ride is the Sybian.

And one of these days we're going to have a challenge between the Sybian and the motor bunny. We haven't done that yet. Okay, and nastiest sex toy. Oh, whoops, I forgot one.

Okay, this one, I think we have a clip. Best organic dildo. Gordy. Oh, Gordy, yeah.

Gordy the dildo. Okay, that is the nastiest sex toy, Mistress Ava Cruz. The humbler, that's what that's called. And now this is...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can't show that. No, you can't show this on Facebook, by the way. No. This is Gordy.

You call it Gordo? Gordo. Gordo. Gordo.

Gordo. Gordo, Gordy. Yeah, we named the rabbit from the last performance Fluffy. He wasn't very fluffy by the time he got done with him.

So organic. Yeah, well you're very fluffy. You have a nice fluffy bush. That actually was playing in the background.

It was a remix done by Peter Kalish of the Jefferson Airplane song. While the rabbit was being extracted from my vagina. Yeah, that's very helpful. Thank you.

Yes, we give you a porno posture here. It's been a while. It's been a while since I've been in a porno posture. It's just taking me back.

Stretches, those labia. Oh, yes. We actually have several award winners in this clip. We have Gordy or Gordo, the gourd.

We have Hitachi Magic Wand. I'm gonna have a hard time. And Riannan again. I think I'm probably personally the cucumber speaker.

I'm pushing my gourd in. This is like reverse cowgirl gourd. Squirting. Oh, yeah.

She squirted all over the gourd. To allow a squirt. So it's just flowing all over the gourd. Flowing all over the gourd.

Okay, let's hear it for Gordo, Gordy, the gourd. Riannan and Hitachi Magic Wand. Okay, so we had the humbler, nastiest sex toy. Now politics, best femdom of the resistance.

Mistress Tara, Indiana. She ran for president against Trump. And she also has formed dominatrixes against Donald Trump. And she will be here actually next week.

So we'll go to Soma, the one with the fire. Best political art our man never was, Scott Seidman. We have some of his work hanging in our gallery. And he has done some great Trump era political art this year as well.

Sexiest lawyer goes to Barry Fisher. Yeah, he came over again. So he gets an award. Hottest fundamentalist refugee is, guess who, our loser is a winner.

Yeah, loser Tversky, who is also in that movie. What's the movie name that he's in? He's in a Netflix movie that has our motor home in it. Oh, one of us is what it's called.

One of us. And it's a really great movie actually. They could have won awards, I think, or it maybe already has. And he's the best one in the movie.

Well, yeah, he always is. The other people are very serious. Yeah, yeah, he's funny. He's funny.

He's the funniest fundamentalist refugee as well. Okay, and you know, most Bonobo resistant movement is still the water protectors at Standing Rock. Yay.

And they were right, of course. Fucking pipe broke. It broke in their first year. The Dakota pipeline broke.

Because pipes break. Because they do. And it broke all over South Dakota. And, you know, sometimes there is such a thing as too much lube.

I'm almost done. So they keep going. Who's talking? Okay, nobody now.

All right. So most Bonobo resistance activist are friend on Twitter and Facebook. And who comes on the show? Chris Gagliardi.

Chris Gagliardi. He's out there at the protest with his mom and his friends, his mom's friends. It's amazing.

And, you know, he likes the show and he calls in and he reports. And he's also, you know, helps with the elections. You've got eight minutes. Best Bonobo sapiens in the field this year goes to University of Puerto Rico,

Mayaguez, professor, retired professor Serena Anderlini-Donofrio, who hasn't been back to Puerto Rico since the horrible hurricanes and Trump's horrible response. But she is doing a lot on Facebook to encourage people to donate to help save Puerto Rico because

it needs all the help it can get. I mean, you know, this is another one of our causes because we love Puerto Rico. It just so happens Phoenix is from, no, your relatives are from Puerto Rico. My dad's from Puerto Rico.

Your dad's from Puerto Rico. So, you know, this is an important island that is close to us. It's our territory, but it doesn't have any rights. And anyway, Professor Serena Gaia had invited me to give the keynote speech at University of Puerto Rico,

the Bonobo way of eco-sexuality, and she supports the Bonobos. She has continued to write about Bonobos and the Bonobo way, and we love her. Sexiest Trump voter, yeah, she wins it again, you know, because she came to the Christmas show and so we had to get her, she came to some show.

No, maybe your birthday or was it our anniversary? I don't know. Tammy Parrott. Okay, but this is a more exciting winner, most reformed Trump voter,

Mistress Ravensong, who voted for Trump, but she recanted and takes it all out on Jay's ass. No, I mean, she does say on the show that she's mad at Trump that, you know, she basically voted for bread and circuses, but all she got was a scary clown. And she, you know, confessed that she had voted for him, thinking that he was a business man,

that a business man could save America. Well, the thing is, he's a failed businessman. Anyway, Mistress Ravensong has a special place in Go Bonobos 2018. Best Trump surrogate is Michael Q. Schmidt, and we just showed a clip with him

as Trump getting himself reamed and stuffed as the Trump turkey. Best Putin impersonator is Tim Sewell, who did some Putin, do we have him? Yeah, there he is, there he is. Trump is my bitch.

Okay. And best Ivanka Trump lookalike. I just had to give this to Kenzie Reeve. She gets two awards because she looks like Ivanka Trump.

There she is, right? Yeah, she does. She does, like a miniature one. Funniest resistance activist is Susan Cooper.

Yeah, there she is. And best Wonder Woman is another University of Puerto Rico professor, Linda Maria Rodriguez Gililmoni. She gave a great interview about Wonder Woman when it came out.

And best Trump satire, UCLA's satire magazine, Sarah Crossway, then Rachel Frank. Sexiest journalism, counter punch. Okay, so here's the booby prizes.

We should pull out our boobies for this. Okay. Biggest asshole, Trump. Okay.

Biggest bunch of assholes, Congress. Biggest bunch of billionaire assholes, Trump's cabinet. And that, brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners, is the Susie Award. Okay, so that's the Susie Awards, you know.

How much time do we have? We're out of time. We're out of time. Yeah, a couple of minutes, maybe.

Okay, I mean, I know we have... You had eight minutes before. I did, but I used them, giving out all the awards. You gave out a lot of awards.

I gave out a lot of awards, Max. Did I leave anybody out? Not that I know of. I don't know, you know, the maintenance guy.

I mean, I don't know. Did we shoot off most of our poppers? Your accountant. I think I got some accountants there.

Got an accountant? Good. Okay, well, Ecor is a winner, and he's here. He's here.

Ecor, oh, oh. Receive your award. Yeah, you have to give it back, though. Yeah, you have to give it back.

Not like you can take it home. Okay, take off all this sweater stuff. Can you help him with that? On the other hand, you can buy your own.

At least you could be in your Bonobo shirt. So, here, sit down. So, you win an award. Where's your, where's a microphone?

Oh, that one's Happy Nude Rear in my ass. Oh, and you do get a button. You can keep the button, actually. Yeah, hit your button.

Everybody likes the button, right? Clemmie made the button. Clemmie made the buttons. Clemmie is so talented on many levels.

Yes. She won a staff award. But you win, you know, hottest hip-hop artist.

Thank you very much. I appreciate that, as always. I appreciate everything that's been allowing me to do up here.

Suzie, ladies and gentlemen, 2017. The Noboville. You may approach the pipe. But Dr. Suzie, it's done.

I appreciate this. Okay. Thank you very much. Is that all you have to say?

You're not going to thank God and, you know, your mom. Most and most importantly, I thank God for allowing us to be here. For the breaths of life.

The breaths of life. 24-7, 365, the breath of life, you know. Suzie says, you know, my 20-phase. But it's a total blessing to see all the people

that's here every week, and all the people that come in, all the different guests, and you allow everybody this platform.

This is a beautiful thing. And everybody's out here living their vision. And all the winners out there, shout out to all the winners.

And all the people that are almost one. Right. You know, the almost. You know, one of the winners

is taking pictures of us. All right, shout out to Jux. Jux. He's here.

Another winner. We all winners, man. We all winners. You get a button.

Awards are not, we're all winners. You know, here. Take your button. Take your button.

Corrupt. Cheerio. Award are not, we're all winners. We just do what we love to do.

Yeah. And we love you. And I have buttons for the Janelle Hopkins family is what I'm calling them.

No, they're the John Clark family as well. You're going to be out of there. And the Derek Wilder family as well. So you guys get award buttons.

Right. And is, is Nori here? Nori. Nori is here somewhere.

Yeah. I heard his voice. Nori. Oh yeah.

Here comes John. Getting a button. Okay. You get a button.

Congratulations, gentlemen. Everybody's wondering where are the cute girls that won all the awards? It's because I didn't invite anybody to the awards.

Here you go. Nori, Nori, you won me over by playing the piano before tonight's show. Best pianist. They see the best pianist.

Best pianist. Take it out. I said he's the most pianist. He's the most pianist boy in this, this side of the Mason Dexter.

You have a hard 70 seconds. Susan. Yes. You have a hard 70 seconds.

Oh, okay. 70 seconds. So, Bonobos. This is our last show of 2017.

Then it's going to be a new year. Happy new year and happy new year. Yeah. And make like Bonobos.

Not baboons. Make love not war. Make love to someone you love tonight. Even if that someone is you.

I love you. And you're a winner too. Talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else. You can talk to us.

I'm Dr. Susan Block, your mistress of the airways. But my day job is director of the Dr. Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts and Sciences, specializing in sex therapy over the phone.

Anytime you need to talk, whether you need serious psychotherapy or a hot phone sex experience or a combination.

My world-renowned telephone sex therapists are just a phone call away. Totally private, absolutely confidential. Listen, talk with you, advise you.

We're all played for you. Phantasize with you. No fantasy is too taboo. And help you with anything from impotence to exhibitionism.

Fears to desires, fetishes to marriages. For more information, call us at 213-291-9497. That's 213-291-9497. Anytime you need to talk.

You're listening to Radio Suzy 1 on the World Wide Web.