27th Wedding Anniversary!

Full transcript of 27th Wedding Anniversary! on The Dr. Susan Block Show:

need to talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else? You can talk to us. I'm Dr. Susan Block, your mistress of the airwaves, but my day job is director of the Dr. Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts and Sciences, specializing in sex therapy over the phone.

Any time you need to talk, whether you need serious psychotherapy or a hot phone sex experience or a combination, my world-renowned telephone sex therapists are just a phone call away. Totally private, absolutely confidential. We listen, talk with you, advise you, role-play for you, fantasize with you, no fantasy is too taboo, and help

you with anything from impotence to exhibitionism, fears to desires, fetishes to marriages. For more information call us at 213-291-9497. That's 213-291-9497 anytime you need to talk. You're listening to Radio Susie One on the World Wide Web, and now here she is, Dr. Susan Block.

Brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners, artists and exhibitionists, voyeurs and connoisseurs, all you children of sex and we are all children of sex with a capital X. Can I get an amen? Amen. Amen.

Amen. Men started because that's, you know, the traditional word. Get it together, okay. Now, can I get an A-women? A-women.

All right. Thank you, brothers and sisters. I want to welcome you to the new love church of the Bonobo Way, here in the new Bonoboville, and everything is so new that we're an hour and a half late. Okay. So I apologize. And we have technical difficulties of so many different varieties, more multiple technical difficulties than orgasms that I had last

night on my 27th wedding anniversary, which is what it is. Happy 27th wedding anniversary to me and Captain Max, who is behind the Facebook camera right now because that's the only camera I think we have. And somebody has to move something, but we're doing what we're doing. So, yeah, we're here. Facebooking and broadcasting live on

DrSusanBlock.tv, maybe on Bonoboville. You should give it a try in the Bonoboville Lounge. This is Bonoboville.com, of course, as we are actually in the new Bonoboville of Terraferma. Right. And we are celebrating our 27th wedding anniversary. That's right. 27 years. And, you know, some couples have just

billion-dollar bank accounts and some have gazillion-dollar wedding rings and huge McMansions, but nobody throws a wedding anniversary Bacchanal like Dr. Suzie and Captain Max, except we're not having one of those tonight. So don't get your hopes up. Although, you can watch our 26th wedding anniversary Bacchanal, which, God,

it featured naked female wrestling and naked sex, actually quite a bit of sex, and naked singing, quite a bit of singing. We're very musical here on the Dr. Susan Block show, even though, you know, tonight is very no frills, let's just say. And it's actually not technically my wedding anniversary, although this is

my wedding with Captain Max, who you can't see right now because he's shooting the camera because that's my Max cab, but there he is, and there she is, she being me. And this is 27 years ago, so we are cutting the cake. My mom forgot to put the groom and the bride up there, so, you know, she remembered

so many things, but, you know, we're cutting it anyway. And, yeah, yesterday, actually, technically, if you're tuned in live, was our 27th wedding anniversary, which we decided to do the opposite of the Bacchanals and go off alone. Just the two of us at the Hilton Double Tree Mountain Hotel, where we looked at

mountains and drank champagne and went swimming, well, I went swimming, and Max drank mojitos and we ate lobster and oysters, which was a bad idea, really, because the oysters at the Red Lobster, they washed them. Never eat washed oysters. Oysters are supposed to taste like Aphrodite's pussy,

you know. If you're Roman, that's Venus, right? So they didn't. They didn't taste like anything because they were washed and they were very thick and juicy, which was interesting because I think they grow them on farms. Anyway, the lobster was good and the sex was great, I must say, especially for two old

people. I mean, multiple orgasms, all the works, everybody came and went and came again and went again and didn't have a heart attack. We checked all that stuff. We really had to make sure that we didn't have heart attacks and Max had to do his breathing exercises and it was cool. It was good.

It's good. You got to keep that heart pumping when you're old, especially. Well, you might as well start when you're young. I hope you guys are pumping it out there in the young era, but I know it's complicated. I know it's difficult. It's really difficult to make love in a world that is so

energized by hate and fear. So we try to spread the love, the bonobo way, and of course the bonobos are not married. They're not married. Max and I are kind of strange, married, monogamous bonobos, but we'll explain how we do that in a little while, right? So here we are.

It's the day after our anniversary. Actually, at this point, I think it's two days after, right? Because, I mean, we took a while. We are testing our technology, okay? And that's what we were doing last week. We know that. Yes, we do. But this week, we're doing it again. And we

have new technology that was actually way too crazy for us to use. But Marilyn is still here, right? Marilyn. Yeah, we love Marilyn Monroe. Somebody last week said, is that Madonna? No, it's Marilyn. And she's our guardian angel. Marilyn is my middle name. And we have

the wall of clothing, which, you know, reminds me of another wall. But this one at least doesn't keep people out. Although the clothes kind of look like people in a little way, being suffocated by saran wrap. And there's my roses for my 27th wedding anniversary. And there aren't very

many symbols of the 27th wedding anniversary. Really, it's kind of, you know, glossed over. Although the number 27 is like a magic number. The 27 Club. But it's all about death, you know, like Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix, and Janice Joplin, the three J's. They all died when they were 27.

Probably some other people too. But, you know, I don't know. I mean, death is where it's at, you know, and that's what happens when you're alive, eventually. And what is the name for the orgasm? The French name. Lipite More. That's right. So, yeah, orgasm is important. Love is important.

Trust. All kinds of things when you want to stay together for 27 years. And are we okay? What is going on? We are okay. Mar just looked a little funny. We are good. We are good. Okay. And so, you know, as long as I'm hearing from my staff, we have no guests tonight. We can't deal with guests

because it's way too difficult. But we do have Bonoboville staff here. And that's Harry over there, Harry Sapien. And he's using a still camera for the first time. And a pillow on his knee so he can make like Monica Lewinsky. And get down, baby. I have to find my Bildo, Mike Bill Clinton Dildo, that is,

which a lot of things are missing. But we do have our wedding anniversary. We do have, oh yeah, we're starting the show. And right over here, I guess first I will introduce the lady in red, which is Blossom Green. And she is in red because, well, I'm wearing a little bit of red. I don't know if she knew that.

But I'm also wearing black jet stone is the gemstone of the 27th wedding anniversary. So I tried to do my best with black and trying not to look like I'm at a funeral. So that's why the red and the roses and the flower is the Cosmo. Cosmos or Cosmo. I don't know. Anyway, I know about the drink, but we're going to have champagne.

So we have roses and you can't go wrong with roses on any anniversary. And we have a new girl, I mean woman. And she's a lady in yellow. She looks kind of like a bridesmaid. And this is Shannon. Shannon, sweet. And she's very sweet. And she looks a little like Marilyn, actually.

Yeah, you know. And stand up. Let's look at your outfit. I don't know if she has a microphone yet. Can we get something? Or I should just keep going. Well, do we need a microphone? We don't have enough ports.

Is she hearable on the camera? Or should she just get very close to me and talk on my mic? Or close to Max? Either one. What? Closer to me? Okay, well, okay. So how are we going to do this? Well, Shannon, you're the new person. You can come sit here and talk into my mic.

Is the way we're going to do this? Because we have very, very little technology tonight. Or you can actually sit on that. I was going to say on this, but this chair, by the way, was one of my anniversary presents. Long ago, one of those anniversaries. Yes, no, not that chair. No, this chair, this chair. Okay, but you're high. You're going to have to lean over.

Okay, you should just come sit here. This is a big chair for two little people. And it works. And you can be here and say hi. Okay, so Shannon is from Texas. And Texas is very famous right now. Because Trump just said, wow, Texas is big. I mean, people don't know that, right?

I mean, I knew that Texas was big, but I've only been a little bit to Texas. Trump also said that Park Avenue intersects with Fifth Avenue. And so he doesn't even know his own hometown. Okay, you got it. You got to talk into my mic first.

Okay, well, I know they made Harry. And Harry is kind of bigger. But you're not too big. But the butthole surfers. Oh, right. The fattest. Does that mean there's a lot of fat people? Or what do you mean? Oh, that's a good kind of fat. Right.

That's true. Here, have a rose. Everyone should have roses on my anniversary. How are we doing technical people? Because you guys are all over the place. They don't need my money. But I like them sitting so close to me. It's so nice. It's so cute and adorable, except that there could be comments coming in on the Facebook here.

Oh, everybody wants to be close to Dr. Susie. Yes, Max. We can pick you up on the Facebook camera. Me too.

Yeah, everybody. Everybody. I should not be talking on here. No, no.

I should take this off. But you don't have to change the microphone. Oh, wow. Okay. So should I keep my mic on? Yes.

I can see what I look like. Well, I'm in the past over there. Now, that's too confusing. I'm in the past. So this is the camera or this one? This one. Okay.

Hi, Facebook. Hi, world. We started like so late, but we're here. And this is the Dr. Susan Block show. That's right.

Some people don't think it's a show because I don't have guests. And I still don't have guests, but look at my staff. Pretty hot. Yeah.

Right. And I need a sip of water. So we have a little male representation right here. And we are celebrating our 27th wedding anniversary.

Can my husband come over and be seen at all? You could come over on this side. Oh, he's going to come over on Blossom's side now. Oh, but you took his chair.

That was going to be his chair. Okay. So now, okay. Well, maybe you should get, we could get together.

No, no, no. We're going to be here, but you guys could come over here. And we can be together like married people and watch Marilyn. Don't puncture Marilyn.

Okay. Hi. So happy anniversary. Happy anniversary to you.

We had a nice time alone and now here we are with our people. And I'm looking at the camera and seeing Marilyn's boobs a lot, which is good. But we should, let's see all of Marilyn a little bit. Let's see all, let's see everybody.

Hello. Come out a little and then come back in. Hey, can you hear me? And I got some balloons.

Can you turn my mic up a little bit? Yeah, let's show my balloons. Good and so wonderful. Blossom, is this your present?

All right. Oh, wow. It's from everyone. Oh, she said yeah at first.

And I said, okay, but Blossom engineered this. Okay. And so it's got Mickey and Minnie. Aw.

And you know, today I was wearing my Mickey and Minnie tank top that, um, yeah, because he's Mickey. That's his nickname. And I'm Minnie.

Hi, I'm Mickey. I guess I'm Minnie. I'm just Minnie, you know, because of everything. So anyway, here they are.

And that's very cute that you got that. And look at all this. I can't read this. Jesus.

Oh, and may you be blessed. Okay. So right away you understand that we are in the little love church or the Bonobo way because we are getting blessed by Jesus who's outside in the yard.

And I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. My Hebrew God that I grew up with and might address next week for Passover.

Oh, it's also Easter. The resurrection of Dionysus. I mean Jesus. Right.

Persephone too. Persephone comes back to her mother in the spring. Everybody comes back. Everyone's resurrected in spring.

And the chickens come home to roost. So great. I'm blessed. And there's all kinds of other words here.

And to anniversary. There's even different languages. This is great. This is a very multicultural card.

I think that must be from Anna or Miguel or something. And happy anniversary. Cheers. Okay.

I think that means the champagne should come out. Okay. Is there any mention of me there anywhere? You check.

You're the Mickey. Oh, I'm the Mickey. I'm the Minnie. That's actually your name.

I'm the thing that you put into the drinks. Right. You slip on the Mickey. You slip on the Mickey.

Now, don't do that. That's what you did in the 50s. Don't do that. Don't do that.

I'm not slipping into anyone's. That's not what you did in the 50s. I'm not slipping into anyone's drink. I mean, I wasn't there in the 50s.

I might slip into other things, but not people's drinks. We have cosmos, not Cos B. Excuse me. Sorry.

Okay. So, yes. Okay. You know what I always say is the wedding ring is a sign of bondage.

It's the most common sign of bondage we have. I only wear mine for shows and special occasions. Max wears his all the time. I wear mine all the time.

Except when I was in prison, they took it away from me. Oh, because they were jealous. What is all this? Oh, no, no.

We want to open the bottle. No, we're going to pop open the bottle. Pop. I'm not ready.

I'm thirsty. She'll take one. Oh, look at... She...

Oh, we're going to get the bottle. There's a bottle. No, no, a cold one. Trump's stunts cap is falling off of him.

Okay. I have to... Okay. So, here we are drinking an hour and a half to all of this.

Yes. And I see that we got Chelsea Raw on here. Hi, Chelsea. And all kinds of folks watching.

And... Toby. Toby Eero. You can scroll that with your finger.

Oh, okay. This is a Mac, by the way. Okay. Can people call us?

Can people call us? They can. They can actually call. Okay, folks.

I'm going to give out the phone number. I know it's late or early depending. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah. Do like... I know. We all have a little bit of penis envy.

Freud pointed that out. So, girls love to put things between their legs and go like that. Oh, you can't touch it. I can't open it, though.

What kind of fucking thing is this? And this is fine Andre champagne, everyone. The best. The best that money...

Andre is the best. Okay. You guys are going to open it far away from me. Okay, but not by the computer.

Watch out. Watch out. Okay. I'm going to move this.

Whoa. All right. There's not even a... What happened?

You were better last night. There was no popping. No popping. No popping.

Okay. You know, tonight is a bit of a difficult night in terms of popping and snapping. But don't drip it on the computer. Could you give me my mimosa back there?

Okay, everybody. I'm happy to be here. Could you take this away from me? And I'll take this.

This is the Dr. Susan Block Show broadcasting live from the new Bonoboville. We're out in the mountains, so it's really difficult to connect. But that's what love is all about, is conquering difficulties and connecting. And it is our 27th wedding anniversary.

And we've had so many Bacchanals. I mean, not just the 26th anniversary, but the 25th, the 24th, the 23rd. I believe the 22nd... Yeah, the 22nd, we did that at the Green Horse.

That was... Oh, the orgy was afterwards. It was on the kitchen table. That's the kitchen table orgy.

Check it out on Dr. Susan Block.TV. The kitchen table orgy, it's amazing. Actually, one of our best orgies. And the 21st was crazy big.

Look at all these hearts we're hearing. But tonight, you know, we're having just us. Because we just moved. And those of you who didn't help us move,

all I can say is you have to put up with our technical difficulties. And no, you can't come here yet, because you didn't help us move. And now look at us. See?

Because you didn't help us move. We're all screwed up. At least we're not screwed in America. Like somebody here.

Who's screwed in America? Where is he? The dunce. We've got him in his...

Actually, we have him in a very nice chair. This is my parents' Eames chair. It's a very nice designer chair. And it is a genuine original Eames chair.

But you probably can't notice because it's got Trump in it. And he's so obnoxious. He takes up all the air in the room. I mean, he gives you post-Trump sex disorder.

He gives some people Trump derangement syndrome. He's building this wall or threatening to, not really building it. A lingerie?

Well, you know what? Maybe he should do a wall of lingerie. That would be better than these other things. And then...

I don't know. I mean, he just causes a lot of problems. And so we keep him under gag order in Bonoboville. With a penis pacifier.

Okay. But I don't want to show that on Facebook too much. But just know he has a penis pacifier in his mouth to keep him from bloviating.

And just infecting us with his narcissistic malignancy. It is an infection. And I don't think he's the only bad actor. You know, I'm really, really upset that a lot of liberals,

so-called liberals, are not defending the freedom of speech, the freedom of journalism, the freedom of the press of Julian Assange and Chelsea Manning,

who are imprisoned now. And you may not agree with them, but they are journalists. I mean, well, Chelsea Manning just was a whistleblower,

which is also important. But Julian Assange, who looks like Old Man River right now, I mean, he looks like Rip Van Winkle, actually. Because he's been living in prison, basically,

in that Ecuador embassy. But they took him out, and they just want to just about execute him, almost. Because he's a whistleblower,

and he's a journalist, just like everybody that works for the Washington Post and the New York Times and CNN and Fox, they all are going to suffer freedom of speech restrictions

if Julian Assange is convicted. Or even now that he's being arrested. This is already boating badly for freedom of speech and journalism.

And check out my backside. And, you know, I'm even a little disappointed in my hero, Bernie Sanders, that he so far hasn't come out for Julian Assange.

Although I will say Tulsi Gabbard has. I don't know if you all know who Tulsi Gabbard is. She's running for president. She's from Hawaii.

She's gorgeous, actually. I mean, I say that. She's sexy, actually. And she's never going to win.

But, you know, I think it's great that she actually came out and said something to the effect of Julian Assange should not be prosecuted. By the way, he could face the death penalty.

I don't even understand that. He's a whistleblower, like Dan Ellsberg, you know. And so is Chelsea Manning, who is now in prison for not repeating herself to a grand jury.

Anyway, I guess I don't want to spend too long on it, but, you know, it's the year of the pig. And these are cute pigs. They're from France, and they're fornicating pigs.

We love them. They eat humans. But pigs, you know, there's a reason we call greedy people pigs, I guess,

because pigs can, yeah, they can be rough. But they're smart. They're smart, and they have... But humans, they're smart in a human-type way.

You know, actually, we're rather close to them. Not as close as bonobos. And bonobos set a better example, okay? But there's a part of us that is very piggy.

And that is the part that is prosecuting Julian Assange and Chelsea Manning. And that is because they exposed the American and just...

Imperial. Imperial...perma wars. And they showed... The main thing is they showed a video

of American troops shooting people in Iraq, just randomly for fun, like they're doing a video game. And they shot some journalists also. From a helicopter.

From a helicopter. And they're talking about it. And they don't like that Chelsea Manning downloaded that. And they don't like that Julian Assange

put it out there in WikiLeaks. Trump liked it a while ago, right? You little two-faced bitch. You fucking bitch.

How dare you? How dare you? You said you loved WikiLeaks. And now you go, WikiLeaks?

I don't know nothing about no WikiLeaks. I don't know. I don't know. Well, you know.

You know you loved WikiLeaks when they were publishing stuff about Hillary Clinton. And, you know...

Anyway, I was a little upset about that, but you know what? I think it's all good. You should publish all of it.

Publish my emails, you know? Just don't record my phone conversations because those are private. Okay, but they don't do that.

They don't record phone conversations. And I always warn my clients when you email me, you are susceptible to infiltration.

However, when you call me, it is absolutely private and confidential. Now, speaking of calls... I did say you could call.

Oh, what's going on here? Oh, okay. Hey, Chelsea, thank you. Scott Webb.

Scott Webb. Hi, Scott. Blast from the past. I haven't heard from him.

Toby Hero. Zorthian. Oh, we love Zorthian. Go to my site if you want to see

some naked dancing. Really hot, amazing classical naked dancing. Go to doctorsusinblock.com slash Zorthian.

And you will see the most beautiful these artist models dancing like Bacchanal around Zorbacus. Yes.

So, if you want to call, you can actually call on the phone, I understand, although I'm not sure. No, no, they can call.

But it's 1-866-289-7068. Okay? That's our toll-free number. Do it again.

1-866-289-7068. Or if you want to call our regular number because you're a regular person, you could call.

626, I've got to look at this because it's a new number. 626-461-5950. How about that?

So, we're testing various things. Is Mario watching? Mario. And we're also testing my

climate change tortured respiratory system, which is actually doing pretty well right now. I don't know.

So, let's see. What else is going on? Well, Chris G., congratulations on your graduation today.

And he dubbed this Bonoboville II. It's not Bonoboville II. Yeah, congratulations.

He graduated from something. And, yeah, it's the new Bonoboville. It's actually like Bonoboville XII. I think of all the places we've been

since 1992 when we got married. This is 1992. And have we had some adventures? We have had some adventures.

Some adventures? Yes. Would you like to tell some? Well, I could go through all the landlords.

Oh, my God. We sued a couple of them and won. That's a long story. Yeah, so, okay.

Hi, Dr. Susie. Happy anniversary. You look beautiful. Happy anniversary.

Where's my champagne? Oh. Are you trying to hide me? Oh, no.

Or my stomach? I'm trying to be affectionate. Oh, look at us. Trying to get your champagne.

What? No, that's my mimosa. Oh, it's good enough. Okay.

Okay. Oh, baby. But I need... You know what I like?

Chantilly lace and a pretty face. I'm not wearing Chantilly lace. Oh. And I'm not even wearing my usual ponytail,

which I do wear a lot. And ponytail. Yeah. And little bones.

I love bones. Hang down. And, oh, we love each other. And it's really corny.

I know. It's like totally corny. Cure? Oh, yeah.

Here he is. The man. All right. But, you know, I don't think you want to stand between my legs.

Right? Can I sit on your knee? Well, if the stool doesn't collapse. Okay.

Here we go. What is this? Ah, my crystal glass. Watch out.

Watch out. Watch out. Watch out. Watch out.

Watch out. Watch out. Watch out. Watch out.

Okay. Susan. The computer. Move the laptop.

Move the laptop. Because I cannot guarantee my own. Actually, move it forward, at least, so we can see it. Oh, went away.

So, if talking on the phone is too much for you, just comment on Facebook or Twitter. We are live tweeting on Twitter. Rami is live tweeting.

Gideon is now filming. Abe is doing everything. I'm not even sure what he's doing right now. Someone's ringing the phone.

Okay. 626-461-590. I think I got it. Anyway, you can ask a question or make a statement or comment

or wish us a happy anniversary, you know. Test our phone lines is the main thing. We want to test our phone lines. Okay.

So, oh, your thing. I'm getting a rest. Oh, yeah, baby. See, now you can just do a hand.

Mmm. Oh, arm pits. Sexy. Mmm.

So, the phones are ringing like crazy. Well, anyway, the phones could be calling for the show or for private telephone sex therapy. And we do know the difference.

Mmm. Nice roses. Except my respiratory problem means I can't hardly smell them. So, when you call us for telephone sex therapy,

which is what supports this whole misogast, then, you know, it's totally private and confidential. You are not on the air. But it is the same phone number.

We have very talented receptionists who can hear you say you want to do a private call or you want to call on the show. And if you want to call on the show,

then you can call on the show. What are you doing behind me? Nothing. Are you putting cuckold ears behind my head?

Cuckold ears. Okay. Cuckold ears are like this. Horns.

Because you see those books over there? That is the Wiley Blackwell Encyclopedia. Okay, you can hold it. You look like a spokesmodel.

The Wiley Blackwell Encyclopedia of Human Sexuality. And there's actually three of them. And this Encyclopedia contains a lot of definitions. And one of them is the definition of cuckold.

And I wrote it. I wrote the definition of cuckold as well as the definition of sexual fetish. As well as the definition of spanking.

Erotic spanking. Not spanking children, okay. Spank adults. We even have a magazine about it.

That Amazon won't print yet. But they will one day. You have to take that to a communist country. Oh boy.

To have it. Now imagine that. Yeah, but spank your friends who want to be spanked. Your lovers, consensual adult spanking.

Consensual is the buzz word. So don't spank children. And if you were spanked as a child, it's okay. You'll survive, I hope.

But you probably have a fetish for spanking. Either that or you can't stand it. You just can't predict these things. But what else?

I wrote the definition of phone sex. Actually, yeah. How about that? Because I'm a little bit of a different kind of therapist.

I combine traditional sex therapy with phone sex fantasy role play. How about that? And no, I'm not asex certified.

Although I am going to speak at asex on the bonobo way of healing transformational love and pleasure. And I'm also going to speak at Domcon.

Here's my Domcon little award here. So Domcon, here we come. We're excited. We're going to go to Domcon day 11.

And I'm going to give the bonobo way. Femdoms of the wild. Because the bonobos are the femdoms of the wild. And they teach us that it's very natural

for females to be empowered. For females to make a lot of the decisions. The bonobos are very close to us. The closest living things to us.

And the females are empowered. And the males are happy about it. That males are happy. Because one of the things about bonobos

is they have a lot of sex. And believe it or not, that makes the males happy. It makes the females happy too. And gives them female solidarity.

They do it through doing hoca-hoca. Anybody want to try a little hoca-hoca? Alright. So I'm coming to the girls now.

Okay, we have to practice this. Because we're going to have to do this in front of the Domcon people who are experts. Because they might have been in my lecture.

Oh! Trump's penis pacifier fell out of his mouth. We can't have that bad boy. Okay.

Spank the dunce. Bad, bad. Spank those balls. Can someone pick up his dunce cap?

Oh, thank you. Okay. You can put it on. Alright, so now though, we're going to do...

Okay, so hoca-hoca is basically when the females rub their... You know, you don't do it with your shoulders. You do it with your hips.

You do it like twerking. But I can't twerk really. But, I mean, you can do it with your ass because after all, the bonobos have

these big bulbous pussies that stick out that we don't really have that bulbous. I mean, most of us don't. Yeah, some do.

Okay, so back and forth and... Back and forth. And back and forth. Well, you know, you can use whatever you want.

Yeah, they do it on each other. Yeah, actually, absolutely. The girls together. I mean, I'm not going to say the boys don't do it, too.

But the girls do it. This is because the bonobos have sisterhood. The power of sisterhood. But they're not really sisters.

And so these bonobos, the girls, they migrate away from their actual mothers and sisters. And they go into a new tribe where they meet new girlfriends

and they become very close. Why? Because they have sex through this hoka-hoka. Yeah, there they go.

Well, it's kind of hug. They hug, too. They definitely hug. But, you know, they do this thing.

And they have orgasms that way. Anyway, we'll work on it, ladies. But that's pretty good. Can we have a hand for my hoka-hoka girls?

Okay, thank you. So, Max, it's our anniversary. Yes. Do you have anything profound to impart to men or women?

What's men? Oh, okay. You can't impart yet, Max. Okay.

Hello, Chelsea. Hi. Hi. Oh, wow.

Our phones work. Are you happy? But I'm happy to hear from you. Happy hoka-hoka.

It's hard to hear you right now. And the live video just froze for a sec, but... Okay, so she said happy hoka-hoka. We have big parties there over the years.

That's for sure. Can you turn up the speakers in the... The speakers or else we just look like we're people holding our mouths open.

Chelsea, we love you. Hold on to that thought. We're going to try to pull your mic level up. And I'm going to take a sip.

Okay, we love you. Hold on. We're hearing you better now. We're in a new space.

Well, I'm sure everyone's missing you and not getting to be with you today. You usually have all your friends coming. So, happy anniversary to you.

We don't need them. But, you know, I mean, it's okay. And we're glad to have you. And we'll soon have a bunch of these people.

Please, Chelsea. Oh, they're all missing you. That's who she was talking about. Oh.

It is... Nice to hear from you, Chelsea. I was cutting out just a little. Sorry. Sorry.

Can you hear us? Hear us? Yeah, I was cutting out just a little bit. It's very exciting.

If you can hear me, I'm just glad that you're getting some fresh air. You know me. I'm the tree hugger.

Oh, yeah. Well, Chelsea's a little bit aware of my respiratory issues from the last place I was living

was just like filled with ash from the fires and building materials from all the construction. And now it's a little clearer anyway. Or maybe it's just time.

But, yeah, much better. Thanks, Chelsea. So, when are you going to come visit us? Come down for Duncan.

Well, I didn't help you move. No, you didn't. I wasn't going to point that out. I'm not going to say it's okay.

I know, so... No, it's a little, you know, demerit. Well, there's a few people here that would like to visit.

So, I'll... They can't. We'll bring a couple of some fun people from Portland. They didn't help us move.

They don't get to come here. Nope. We've got to. Okay.

Well, maybe. Do it. I don't know. Bribery is always acceptable.

Thank you for the invite. Miss you guys. You're awesome. We miss you too, Chelsea.

We love you. And we hope to see you soon. Go bonobos. Yay!

All right. We had a call. And we could hear it. Even though she could barely hear us.

Yeah, I don't know what she heard. I hope she didn't hear me saying that. She's not invited. Oh, you're very modern people.

You can actually get on your phone and call us. It really... Yep. Or you could pay for it.

That's nice. Yeah. Right? I mean, we certainly pay for it when you call 1-866-289-7068.

That is our toll-free number. And when you call toll-free, keep it short. Or you can call 626-461-5950. That is our...

And the phone is ringing for me and my boy. The phone's ringing. Okay. And let's see.

So... What else do we have there? What else do we have here? Oh, well, one thing that we do have is...

Anything about me there? A Cosmo next week. Anal sex tips, all right? Anal sex tips.

Anal sex tips, right? That champagne next to that iPad or whatever that thing is, is a little dangerous. Here is Chef Bilal and Danielle Watts in our splash with E.Core the Wolf.

All right. And Gypsy Bonobo, who gave me this bracelet around my gauntlet. What happened back there with my technical people? They're much more emotional than the art people.

You know, the tech people. My voice is a little bit... There you are, sweetie. Again, and I have a loud voice.

Ha! There you are. Way better. Thank you very much.

I was going to try to whack it out. Whack it out. Whack it out. This, by the way, is my neon vlogger.

Fiber optic. From Goddess Phoenix, thank you. We will see you soon at DomCon. The thing that I was going to say.

Okay. You are about to say something very profound. Something profound. About being married 27 years.

Yes. I am cutting out. Why am I cutting out? Okay.

Move off. Move off the seat. You're separating the happy couple. I'm moving five feet away.

Okay. Two. Three. Four.

Five. Not in that spot. It would be the spot that's next to me. I've been banned.

Okay. Let me go to the other side. Hello. Hello.

Hello. Hello. Hello. All right.

How's he doing here? Okay. I'm now here. Is that better?

That's a little better. You can rub my feet from here. Okay. Two.

Up. Oh, that feels good. Oh, man. Hi, batteries.

Hi, batteries running down. What is that? What happened to the foot rubbing? Okay.

We've got a... I'm getting new batteries. I'll be right back. Right.

Censorship. Censorship. This is the worst kind of censorship. Okay.

Don't compare yourself to Julian Assange and Chelsea Banning. Well, actually, you should be compared because you are also a journalist who has been censored. And imprisoned. And imprisoned.

Am I right? Yes, sir. It was a lot of fun. Well...

I was hanging out. Still. It's not right. I was hanging out with the mafia and stuff.

That was fun. Yeah. Okay. Well, yeah.

You know. I mean, you're a very positive person. You make the best out of a bad situation. I've been separated from my mimosa.

Oh. This one's mine. Okay. So what is it like to be married for...

27 years. 27 years. Okay. So can I speak or do I have to be...

Oh, I thought you might want to rub my foot. Why would you speak? No, because I'm drinking. Oh.

But he is rubbing my foot, which is really nice about him. I keep getting interrupted in my very important speech. Okay. Oh, it feels good.

Go ahead. So this is about foot rubbing. And one of the things I have a little bit of a foot fetish. And my wife has three, four, five, six, seven little lesbian girls.

They all live in a shoe. I want to tell you about them. This is the big... This is the big mama.

Yeah. This is the very tall model. Oh. Okay.

She is the... Painting the ass of the family. Okay. So very conceited.

Okay. Because she's tall. This is her sister. One of the sisters.

A little shorter. Okay. And this one here... Slightly deformed.

A little deformed is challenged, is physically challenged. Okay. And then this little toe here, that's the little baby. And when she grows up, she wants to be just like this big model here.

So, you know, this is like the piggy story, but with toes. Right. With toes. These little piggies.

And there's 10 of these girls. These are the kind of piggies we really like. Yeah. Toes.

Yeah. So, and they're fun to squeeze. Okay. And it's one of the good things that's kept us in our marriage, because when I first

met Susan, I didn't know how I could touch her breast or something like that. My goodness. That would be forward. Right.

So I started to like play with her toes. He rubbed my toes. And the toes, the toes said to her, hey, this guy's pretty cool. They sent a message directly to my brain.

Directly. And my heart. Yeah. And said, this guy is very cool.

So. He knows how to rub us. Right. So.

The right way. These toes let me in to the jackpot. That's true. So, sometimes the way to a woman's heart is through her toes.

That's correct. But you got to do it right. You got to take a foot massage class or something. Don't just suck on the toes or do it perfunctorily.

Do it like you mean it and pay attention to a woman's responses to how she feels. And I mean, women are often very self-conscious about their feet. After all, we walk on them all day, sometimes in high heels. And we kind of feel like, oh, I don't want somebody to touch my feet.

But if you love them and you tell the woman that they're beautiful, you will gain access to the rest of her body and her mind and maybe her soul. I think with a lot of women, not all women, some of them want you to rub their hand or their back of their knee is a good spot.

But a lot of us love to have our toes massaged. And yeah, just like Blossom said, make a woman feel beautiful. But it's not just feel beautiful. It's feel good.

Don't worry about the head. Make sure that that Facebook camera is close by. Feel good. Please.

Beautiful is part of feeling good. But if you just say, hey, you're beautiful, honey. That ain't going to cut it. You got it.

You don't rub something. Really. I mean, we're very tactile people. We need to, but of course you need to have consent.

You can't just go picking up a woman's foot. You can't walk into a bar and say, I want to rub your toes. Look at these feet. Look at those high heels.

My goodness. Little Shannon's got some Cinderella high heels there. Yeah. Can you get close?

Get close to those feet. Show those feet to everybody. Feet in high heels. I do remember that.

That was a nice feet. Beautiful feet. Rubbed feet together. Very nice feet.

What are you going to do? I'm going to put high five. Oh, foot high five. Oh, let me, let me join in.

Oh, those are my, well, I gave you those shoes. Let's put it that way. They're not my shoes anymore. Okay.

So I think I'm standing on my right foot, which means I'm going to have a foot cramp later tonight. Okay. So here we go.

Okay. I'm going to be underneath because I'm the oldest. Okay. Aren't those great feet?

Oh, I'm in the middle. Woo. All right. So red bottom.

Those aren't from the game of thorns, are they? That's the game of thrones. But it might as well be the game of thorns because of all the violence in that movie. That is, I have never seen that fucking movie.

It's a television show. Whatever that thing is. And it's by the way produced by our producers on HBO. Right.

Yeah. I have never seen such bloodletting in my life. Yeah, it's a lot of bloodletting. It's worse than what we did in Iraq.

No, no. It's not worse than that. No, it's not. No, no, no.

Because then we were really killing people and we still are. And we still are in Afghanistan. Okay. The only thing I liked about these thorns was the monster.

The dragon. The dragon. The dragon was cool. The dragon had a great face.

The dragon girl, that woman was in constant, what's happening? She looked like a cat in the headlights of an uncoming train. She had a tough situation there. But I think it's funny that all the important people survive and everybody else gets killed

in these fucking things. Yeah. But this is the most award winning television show. I think it's disgraceful myself.

It was pretty bad. But not as bad as a lot of the shows, the cop shows, the raping women's shows. I mean, so much blood. And then, of course, there's the cooking, the restaurant show.

Now we used to, when we would go out and go to a hotel, we would enjoy watching Anthony Bourdain. We always did because he made the food look good. But he also examined the culture of the people.

And now they have this other guy whose name I don't know, which is probably good because I'm going to slander him. Yeah. He's got white hair.

What's his name? Guy Fieri. Oh, the guy with the electrocuted hair. Yeah.

Right. And just say he ain't no Anthony Bourdain. I'm sorry. Although he can come here and taste my husband's cooking,

which is better than all the places he's going. Huh? What's his name? Guy Fieri.

Yeah. You know him? Guy Fieri. You what?

So why is he all over television? He's got the same channels that Anthony Bourdain had. Oh, the Trumpsters love him. The Trumpsters.

Well, because he looks like he really does eat all that stuff. You know, Anthony Bourdain never looked like he ate that stuff, even though he... Well, Anthony Bourdain, maybe he had a good metabolism

or whatever he had. I know, we miss Anthony Bourdain. But you know, he's gone. And now we have this other guy, Guy Fieri.

Guy... Yes. Go ahead. Defend.

Defend. Sure. You know, his tall food is overpriced. Oh.

Does he wash his oysters? Wait a minute. He has a restaurant, too? It just seemed also like too many ingredients.

But anyway, I don't do a cooking show myself. And when I do, it's usually involving splosh. If I cook, I'm going to rub it on somebody's body and lick it off.

So yeah. But I mean, I'm not hating on him. You know, there was no violence in that. Just...

No hating. No hating. But, well... I just hate the people.

I hate people just throwing Julian Assange under the bus. I don't hate those people, but I hate that they're doing that. Julian Assange? Is he a chef also?

You know, probably has to be, because nobody was cooking for him there, except maybe Pamela Anderson. He was eating that good.

You know, let's hear it for Pamela Anderson. Oh yeah, Pamela. Pamela Anderson. Another one who was probably very much influenced by Marilyn Monroe.

And a very political person, even though she's... You know, most people think she's just a hot bimbo and a sexy, sexy gal, which she is.

But she's also been one of the greatest supporters of... What are you... What are you doing? I was just imitating Marilyn.

What are you doing? I was imitating Marilyn when she sang to President Kennedy. Oh, you're singing like... Happy birthday to you.

This is Max doing Marilyn. To you. You have to wear a clingy dress. Happy birthday, dear President.

Aww. Happy birthday to you. That's very good. All right, is that great?

Now, the reason people stay married for 27 years... Right, what's that? ...has nothing to do with this guy that goes around tasting everybody's food

and then cooks bad food. It's got nothing to do with that. What it has to do with is keeping a marriage alive, full of love, full of sex,

full of acknowledgement, and to witness each other's lives. Witness, that's right, brothers and sisters. To witness each other's lives.

We are witnesses to each other's lives, to each other's love, passion, the problems and the pleasures. I couldn't have said it better myself, darling.

I know, I interrupted you. Except that it's my line that you took it. It's your line. Well, sort of.

Wait a minute. I had that line first. You remember that, right? I think it was mine to begin with,

but then you took it. Okay. Anyway, when you really love each other, sometimes you finish each other's thoughts

and then you feel that you're the one that came up with it when it was actually the other person. And that can be a problem,

but it is a sign that you're thinking along the same lines, which is a beautiful thing. And to be creative in marriage. To be creative.

To honor each other's creativity. And to look into each other's eyes. And something very important that I learned after two marriages.

Right. I only had one. He had three. And one thing that people don't really kind of realize,

you fall in love. And then you're married for a while. You're married for a while. And then you kind of decide

that you don't like the smell of each other. Ugh! What are you saying? Yeah.

No, that's true. That's true. Yeah. Because at first you fall in love.

What's the punchline? I mean, what about us? The punchline is divorce court. Oh!

No, no, you smell. I love your smell. Oh! Well, thank you for confirming.

I love your smell. Thank you. Another thing that happens at this kind of marriage falls apart as you wake up one morning and you look over

to the other side of the pillow and you go... Excuse me. Who the fuck is that? Oh!

That's a terrible feeling. That's a terrible feeling. I've had that about boyfriends. Yeah.

My girlfriends. My girlfriends. It's like, it happens, you know. And the smell thing too.

Yeah, and the smell thing too. Yeah. And people say, the smell thing? Well, the smell thing happens when you're on drugs,

like ecstasy or a lot of alcohol when you have sex and you're not really smelling right. And then, of course, you're not taking that stuff and then you really smell the person.

Both physically and psychologically. So, you've got to really love their smell without drugs or alcohol. That's important.

And I'm all for drugs and alcohol. And also... But really, you really are not going to be able to be on drugs and alcohol all the time

for 27 years. Also, you have to get rid of the white picket fences and the veneer and the story about marriage. Okay?

Because it's a fake story. It has nothing to do with reality. And it doesn't work for most people in marriage. So, they live in a prison with white picket fence

around them and they live in misery. And get rid of that white picket fence and be out there, be crazy, be beautiful, be creative, be peaceful, be peaceful.

Peace through pleasure. That is the bonobo way. And let's give a hand to Captain Max, please. And may I add...

I guess my speech is over. Well, no, you can come back and do another speech. Don't you like the applause though? Okay, so, yeah, that's all true.

It's important that you love to be together. And that that's your favorite thing. I mean, that's why we spent yesterday just the two of us. But no couple is an island.

And I think when it's just the two of you all the time, I don't care how much you love each other. That's going to be a problem. And I think it is just the two of you and the kids.

Oh, the kids. That's even more of a problem. So you've got to have a community, I think. Some kind.

We have bonoboville. We kind of go together and then we come back to bonoboville. And I think that's an important thing for couples to do. To be able to reach out.

Reach out. And also never really grow up, never get too serious. Never get too serious about things. People get very serious about things.

Yes. Play. That's another aspect of the bonobo way. Play.

Is to play, play, play. That's the bonobo way. If you can't keep playing because you're busy working or taking care of the kids and being responsible,

then you're going to just hate each other. Because that's what work does. And I love to work. I'm a bit of a workaholic.

And so, you know, it's important to get back to play. And it's good if your work is play, but not enough. You have to get away from the work that's play and get into a totally other kind of play.

Where you're just playing like bonobos in bed. Yeah. Like last night. Like last night.

Wow. Pop that champagne bottle, baby. Oh, yeah. Hey, old people can have sex too.

We're not as athletic. Old people, who are you talking about? Look, these guys don't exercise, but they have sex. Actually, you do need to exercise,

but sex is a form of exercise. You know, it gets your heart racing. It's good to do. But if you only do sex and no exercise

and you only do sex once a month, that's going to kill you. Okay. You got to do it at least once or twice a week.

Well, if you're old like us, I don't know about once a day. But, you know, if you're young once a day, twice a day, three times a day, it's all good. You know, if you're old,

try to do it once or twice a week, okay? May I restrain myself? More champagne. Yeah.

Open it. Let's pop. Bring the champagne. Pop it, baby.

That's another thing that you should have in your marriage. A lot of champagne. Right. Not so much hard liquor, but a champagne is good.

This is Abraham here. Look, Abe has breath. This is Abraham. And his dick is on his stomach.

It's really amazing. Look at that. Yeah. You got to shake it, baby.

Shake it, baby. Shake it a little, but don't get it on your camera. Shake it. Shake it.

All right. Okay. That's very good. Very good.

These are the last two. Okay. Okay. Be careful here.

Okay. Okay. Not on me. Okay.

Move out of the way. Okay. It's going to get on the chair. Okay.

Well. This is my anniversary chair. Ricochet. Don't get it on Marilyn.

Yay. Whoa. Oh. Yay.

At least it came. All right. A little late, you know, but that sometimes happens when you're a little. And I got a little gold in my champagne from the label.

And it's me one day. You're giving me a little freshen up my. Who's the woman that gave us that rug, the Persian rug? That was Renee Dupont.

Okay. Renee Dupont. Okay. So the advice I got from Renee Dupont, who gave us a beautiful Persian rug was don't

let the wine touch the metal. That's unlike, you know, push the pedal to the metal or whatever that. How does that go? Yeah.

So I just did that. So that ruined the wine and ruined everything. You also have some gold in your champagne now. Oh, is that Trump's Golden Shower?

No, no. Okay. By the way, you can watch Trump's Golden Shower on Dr. Susan Block.TV or Clipperama and in the censored form on YouTube.

And yes, it really is, you know, the Russian Hooker's Pea Party for Trump that Mueller completely missed. How about that? And only on Dr. Bush.

Never trust a former director of the FBI, especially if he was hired by George W. Bush. Right? The Texas Executioner. No offense to Texas.

But yeah, a lot of shitty politicians. I mean, I wanted Beto to win at least the Senate, but you guys came close. He came close. Yeah, no, no, he came very close.

I'm so disappointed in the Democrats lately, but I will browse myself for one of them, I guess. Well, I like Bernie the best, but I'm a disappointed he hasn't said free Julian Assange. But maybe he will. And I like everything else about Bernie, especially the fact that he's an old, balding guy, you know, revolutionary.

Yeah. Right, I love balding guys with big ideas. You know, they have a lot of testosterone, so that's part of it. A big, he's six feet tall?

Yeah, but he bends over all the time. I didn't know that. Yeah, that's what I thought too. I thought he was like a short little Jewish guy.

Because he's like this all the time. Really? Even when he was in college, he was like this. Because he's Jewish.

But anyway, he's probably not going to get the Democratic nomination because, you know, he's too good a guy other than not supporting Julian Assange. He's also a socialist, basically. What is wrong with socialism? I think socialism is great, and you know what?

So does the 1%. Don't talk amongst yourselves. Shout it out to the people. But not while I'm talking.

Who's talking now? Nothing. Okay, I was. But anyway, yeah.

Hey, the 1%, the bankers, the Wall Street people, they love socialism. I mean, they were the ones that had to be bailed out when they fucking screwed everybody in 2008. That's socialism. For the rich.

There are two great socialist examples in this country. One is government, the senators, and all those guys that get medical care, retirement, they get all of those things. The other totally socialist organization is called the United States Army. They get so much money.

If we could just get like a quarter of that money. They get housing. They get all of these things here. Without the wars, it would be very sustainable.

But we put billions and billions and billions of dollars killing children and women. All over oil and water. Water is the next resource that are intelligent. Don't talk about opium because the greatest guy, you know all this, right?

The greatest drug dealers in the world is the English Royal Family, the Bank of England. And America is doing pretty good too with that. America is not doing that. If we just made all these drugs legal, then it would just pull all of the government involvement as well as the criminal involvement out of the picture.

And yeah, there would be people on the drugs, but probably fewer. And we could handle that, you know, with some therapy, various things. But there are no more heroin addicts. There are no more heroin addicts than when bare heroin was available in any drug store.

Actually, there are a lot more. You could go and buy bare heroin. So, you know. Of course.

Well, we are getting the process started, brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners. Can I get an amen? Amen. Can I get an A-women?

We are legalizing marijuana. And that is a step in the right direction. That is important to legalize marijuana. I do want to add something to that.

And everybody thinks that marijuana is legal in Holland. Does everybody know that it's legal in Holland? Well, it was. No, it's not legal in Holland.

And it's not legal. But here's what the marijuana people say in Holland. If the government legalizes it, then they can take it away also. Okay, we can call it decriminalizing.

It's about decriminalizing, basically, where even if it's illegal, you don't prosecute it. Okay, amen and amen to that. Yeah. Decriminalizing.

And I also want to shout out to my friend Willem the Ritter. Hi, Willem. Yeah, hi, Willem. Willem the Ritter was the first artist in Holland who opened the Milky Way.

The Milky Way was the first place in Holland where marijuana was sold openly. And it was done in a milk factory across the street from the Central Police Station of Amsterdam. And that was before it was decriminalized. He also, I also want to, if you've been to Holland, he also started the Paradiso Club,

which is world famous, you know. So, hi, Willem. And Willem's older than I am. Oh, yeah.

He's still alive. Boy, you make that sound. He's still kicking. And he was the first person in radio to masturbate on the air.

Does he have a Facebook? He has a Facebook. Of course, he has a Facebook. He's an extraordinary artist along the lines of some of the people that you...

Willem the Ritter. Willem the Ritter. Look it up later. Look it up later.

That's enough for him. He's probably waking up and taking his morning constitutional. Yeah. So, okay, so...

Okay. Okay. Okay, let's... How much time do we have left?

Anybody know? Okay. Hour and 20. We're almost done.

We have 10 minutes left. Well, you know... I'll end the show now. Yeah.

You're doing great. It's our anniversary. And, you know, our 27th wedding anniversary. And seven is a lucky number.

And even though they didn't have much to say about the 27th wedding anniversary online, except you wear jet stone, jet black. Anyway, we're jet centers. Is anybody still watching?

And we're going to be at Dom Con May 11th. Yeah. And Del Ray is going to be with us. And Rhiannon Arons.

Yes, most well-rounded kingster. And an extraordinary artist, actually, also. And an extraordinary performance artist. And an MFA who teaches at Long Beach.

And yeah, we're very excited. Dom Con. And then after that is going to be Asect, the American Association of Sex Educators.

No, Sex Therapists Educators. No, Sex Therapists, Counselors and Educators. And perverts. And perverts.

I don't know. Anyway. Yeah, Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists. Right.

Asect. And that's going to be in Philly, my hometown. My hometown. Yes, indeed.

We're going to go to the airport. And then we're going to go to our hotel. Which is, I'm not going to say. But the actual talk is going to be at the Lowe's.

And so, you know, we're going to hang out. We're going to go to the Liberty Bell. We're going to have a Philly cheesesteak. You know, Philly hoagie.

And hang out with our Philly dogs. You know, and pigs as well. All right. So, we're about to wind up.

You know, follow the Bonobo way, of course. And that means supporting Bonobo conservation. Because without actual Bonobos, the real ones, we can't follow the Bonobo way so easily.

I mean, we can. You know, just like we kind of find out through archaeology about our ancestors. But these are our living closest cousins.

And if we lose the Bonobos, we lose a key to female empowerment, male well-being, great sex, and peace through pleasure. That's right, brothers and sisters.

They have the key to peace through pleasure. They are the opposite of all these wars, these endless wars. And they're also very eco-sexual. They don't know it.

And maybe we shouldn't know it so much. I mean, we maybe have too much... Why are you talking without, you know, talk loud? Tell me what you're saying.

No, we have not. No, that's not true. That is not true. Humans have been around in these bodies

with these brains for at least 100,000 years. Maybe 150 or 200,000. No, we were not at war with each other. So you know what created war among humans?

Private property. What created war had to do with sex. What created war... We were hunter-gatherers.

We were hunter-gatherers. We didn't fight. We maybe fought a little. Okay, no, you didn't want land.

When you were a hunter-gatherer, nobody owned any land. When farming came along. You're not listening. See, you're smiling like that.

You're not listening, yeah. When you're a hunter-gatherer, you don't own anything. Why do you think these hunter-gatherer societies do not want to be infiltrated by modern humans?

It's still in the Amazon. They're in the Amazon and they're going to take everything away from them and they know it and they're trying to keep it out because they know that they have something special

that we have lost. And the reason we lost it is because of sex. A certain kind of sex. Not most sex, which is about love and about caring

and about feeling good and about peace through pleasure. No, it's just the part of sex that's about reproduction. And when humans discovered the so-called secret of reproduction that was eating of the fruit of the tree of knowledge.

And just like it says in the Bible, the Bible is right every once in a while. When you eat the fruit of the tree of knowledge, you are kicked out of paradise.

In this case, you're not so much kicked out of a garden as you're kicked out of the jungle and into the garden. And then you're forced to work by the sweat of your brow because then you own land because you realize,

hey, reproduction, that means male sperm and female egg. You may not know about male sperm, but you know that it takes one man and one woman to create a baby so you want to know who your children are.

And then you want to keep women under lock and key because if you don't, they may not bear your children and you're investing in them. But almost don't know who their children are.

They don't know. The males don't know. Of course, the females know. But once the males know, and I know you guys love to be good fathers,

and that's great. But the bonobos, they just have peace through pleasure. And once you know who the father is, then the fathers start to fight

because they want to bequeath their farms to their children. Their land. Because not only do they learn about human reproduction, they learn about animal reproduction, non-human animals,

and they learn about vegetable and fruit reproduction. And then they start to plant things, which seems like a good idea. But it creates disease.

It creates overcrowding. It creates war because if you have a piece of land, you have to defend it or somebody will get it. So you've got to arm those people

and that is what creates war. And that is why war was created, not 150,000 years ago, when humans became the way we are now,

biologically. But when humans started the Neolithic period, when we started farming, and farming, I've said it before,

I mean, you farmers, you're great. You're great. Just like everybody else. But farming is the root of all evil. It is.

And hey, we've got to farm now because we don't know what else to do. And we've got to figure out a way out of this mess. But we've got in the mess through farming

and through controlling reproduction, through controlling women, through controlling children, through controlling animals,

controlling non-human animals. We call it domestication. It's not that. It's slavery. And that's what started slavery, too.

Because who's going to work the farms? Most people don't want to work these farms, so you enslave people. And that's what gives you a profit.

And that's what creates this mess. So now we're here and we have to kind of move our way through it somehow. Hopefully won't destroy the human race.

I don't know. Hopefully won't destroy all the other species. And my way, the only way I can think of is the bonobo way.

I don't believe that we're going to save ourselves through rocket ships. We're only going to save ourselves through some of us surviving

and making peace. And not consuming so much. Through pleasure. That's what this community is about.

Not consuming so much. Not everybody has a car. Not everybody has to take their wardrobe to the clean. Not everybody has to take a bath.

Okay? It's heating water. Water. There's a cost to it.

There's a cost to the environment. There's a cost to everything. There's a cost to what the city has. Yeah.

So as knowledge, if you get too much knowledge, it's like the mafia. You're dead.

You get too much knowledge. I've always been for knowledge. But a little too much knowledge can be a very dangerous thing. And we're there.

And now we have to use our big brains to get out of it. Before we end too, I'm going to do a little

selling here. So this magazine here is 200 and some odd pages. Extraordinary magazine,

one of the most beautiful magazines that I've made over the years with my beautiful... I like how he says I.

I was just going to finish. Let me finish with my beautiful partner and wife. Excuse me. And an extraordinary thing happened

that didn't happen in the early days. Nowadays, everybody's a censor, corporations are censors.

When I was doing magazines, there was a judge, there was a jury, there was an accusation,

and there was a trial. Nowadays, there is none of that. The jury's gone, the trial is gone.

It's just an accusation that you don't meet our standards. So I used to be able to find printers

who would say, I will print that in the middle of the night. Today, I have to go to a communist country,

okay? I have to go to a communist... Listen carefully. A communist country.

A dictatorship. Well, they're not communists anymore. Okay, they are communists. But they've always also been capitalist

because the Chinese are one of the great traders of the world, seafaring nation that sold the herbs

and silks and they had armadas of ships with hookers on them. Hookers.

Okay, I'm not talking about that. Okay? So, if you want to help publish this magazine, give me a call, okay?

It's cheap. It's good. And we have to change the world and we change the world with our crotches, okay?

That's right, baby. That's right, baby. And we say, fuck you, we're going to have a revolution of information.

And just like Emma Goldman said, I don't want a revolution. I can't dance to. You know, if you don't have a fun revolution,

you don't have a worthy revolution. And if we ever stop revolutionizing, we will become and we're watching this game of thorns

in the meantime. Thorns, thorns. That's a toilet. And they don't even have any thorns on the roses. So, if we keep watching this stuff

and playing all these little games in the meantime, fascism is everywhere creeping up on us. That's right.

We got to get rid of the Trumpists. Impeach them. But, you know, we got to do more than that. A lot more than that.

This thing didn't start with Trump. Well, you know what they do with dictators, right? In Italy, they hang them by their feet at a local gas station.

In Germany, they commit suicide. His name was Hitler. Okay.

And so, we have to get rid of this monster. These fascists, these Nazis, these races, they're in Washington, D.C.

and are taking over the judgeships. They're taking over the courts. Although, you notice that Trump's sister quit her judgeship because she don't want

to get too involved with all the investigating. She quit. Trump. Okay.

Donald, you can quit too, right? And then you can divorce Melania and move on to your next wife because you ain't celebrating your anniversary

like we are, okay? You know, I don't even think you guys share the same bed together. And Ivanka and that other guy.

Ivanka maybe shares the bed with Donald. Take them away. Carmelize them. I'm a criminalizer.

Carmelize them. Actually, you were right. All right. Let's caramelize Jared Kushner

and Ivanka Trump, really. And I think we're going to wind up this show. We're winding it up. Make like bonobos.

Come on. Gather round, everybody. Let's gather. Gather.

Grab a rose or a glass of champagne or a pig. And make like bonobos. Not baboons. Yeah, drink up.

Make love, not war. Make love to someone you love tonight. Even if that someone is you. I love you.

Let's hear the clap. See the clap sign. All right, everybody. Can't talk about with anyone else.

Another great show. You can talk to everyone. I've done this before. Stand up.

You're a mystery for me. But my day job is director of the Dr. Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts and Sciences,

specializing in sex therapy over the phone. Anytime you need to talk, whether you need serious psychotherapy or a hot phone sex experience

or a combination, my world-renowned telephone sex therapists are just a phone call away. Totally private, absolutely confidential.

We listen, talk with you, advise you. Role play for you, fantasize with you. No fantasy is too taboo and help you with anything

from impotence to exhibitionism, fears to desires, fetishes to marriages. For more information, call us at 213-291-9497.

That's 213-291-9497 anytime you need to talk. You need to talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else.

You can talk with us. I'm Dr. Susan Block, your mistress of the airwaves, but my day job is director

of the Dr. Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts and Sciences, specializing in sex therapy over the phone. Anytime you need to talk,

whether you need serious psychotherapy or a hot phone sex experience or a combination, my world-renowned telephone sex therapists

are just a phone call away. Totally private, absolutely confidential. We listen, talk with you, advise you. Role play for you and fantasize with you.

And no fantasy is too taboo. And we help you with anything from impotence to exhibitionism, fears to desires, fetishes to marriages.

If you've never called before, don't be embarrassed. We all need help with sex at one time or another. Even world leaders do.

Maybe especially world leaders do. But I'm not going to tell you which ones. So, when you need to ask a question or play out a fantasy

or just talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else, call us at 213-291-9497 anytime you need to talk.

Hi, I'm Dr. Susan Block and I've just written a new book called The Bonobo Way, inspired by my love for the make love,

not war, great apes. You know, the ones who have a lot of sex in a bonobo sutra of positions including face to face.

But it's not just how bonobos have sex. It's how they use sex to prevent murder and war. Really.

They're the only great apes that have never been seen killing each other. They practice what I call peace through pleasure.

With the females gently dominating the very happy, very sexually satisfied males. Bonobos are special, partly because they just are

and partly because they're very, very close to us. Almost 99% genetically similar to us. When it comes to being human, even being humane,

bonobos can teach us so much, which brings me to us and more specifically to you. Is your inner bonobo longing to swing free?

Would you like to tap into the hot, natural sex energy within you, that you would, so you can better enjoy the pleasures in life

and cope with the pain, you know, the pain and have more orgasmic, organic, sustainable sex.

Who doesn't want that? Greater lust, greater trust and better anger management and who couldn't use a little bit of that these days.

So get the book, learn the bonobo way. You'll be glad you did. Then you'll want to join Bonoboville, a new global village for bonobo lovers and friends.

And one last thing, the real bonobos are highly endangered, so a portion of all book sales go to bonobo conservation groups

working to save the wild bonobos from extinction. Read the bonobo way and learn why this could be the most important eco-sexual movement of our times.

And improve your love life.