Masturbation Exploration

Full transcript of Masturbation Exploration on The Dr. Susan Block Show:

You're listening to Radio Suzy One on the World Wide Web and now here she is, Dr. Susan Block. Brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners, artists and exhibitionists, voyeurs and connoisseurs, master-baters and fornicators, yes, wankers and monkey-spankers and plank-yankers and meat-beaters and nub-rubbers, pearl-polishers and hand-slammers, hog-floggers and oil-drillers,

snake-charmers and gopher-grinders, fist-tumpers and muffin-buffers, ball-jugglers and duck-pluckers, pud-pounders and bush-beaters, shank-shaggers and finger-paners, wood-shiners and grottoes, brokers, salami-slappers, sausage-squeezers, pickle-ticklers, starting to sound like a deli in here. Okay, merry masturbation month! Yes, indeed, brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners, all you children of sex

and we are all children of sex with a capital X. Can I hear an amen? Amen! Can I hear an ay-women? Ay-women!

And you know, sex is what brings us into the world. Yes, indeed, brothers and sisters, hallelujah, that's correct. We may or may not be children of God, Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Brahma, Ramadhamma, but one thing we know, we are all children of sex. Yeah, I think sometimes it involves chemistry. But sex is involved, you know, sperm and eggs, so far until we start cloning ourselves.

Then who knows, except sex will probably always be with us, because after all, sex, brothers and sisters, is not mainly about procreation, not for human beings, brothers and sisters, maybe for certain animals, but not the human animal. The human animal has sex most of the time for recreation, brothers and sisters.

Hallelujah, that's correct. It's not all about making babies and more babies and more babies. We've done quite a bit of that, but we can also use sex for pleasure. We can also use sex for relaxation, and that's where masturbation comes in in this merry masturbation month of May.

Yes, that's right. Here in Bonoboville, the merry masturbation month of May is our Christmas, as Baby Block Amor says, or like Ramadan for the Muslims, right? It's our Ramadan, okay? It's a Susan Block masturbation Christmas. It's like Pesach for the Jews, except a month, right?

And I don't know, I don't know what the Hindus do, something. I'm sure that, you know, Bum Shiba Shemvelay, you know? Well, that's a certain sect of Hindus. Anyway, yes, it's a special time of month, because we...

Well, of course, we don't only masturbate in May. Nobody's silly enough. I'm kind of getting sick of people who say, why is May masturbation month? Shouldn't every month be masturbation month? I masturbate every month, you know?

But it's kind of like Black History Month and Women's Month. It's like the month that you not just do the thing, you honor the thing. You talk about the thing. You get into the thing, you know? And the thing being self-love, brothers and sisters.

We praise. We praise. People are whispering in the church here. Don't be whispering in the church, brother and sister. The priest is going to slap me.

Oh, I'll sick my snake on you. Don't be whispering in the church or I'll separate you. She was picking on me. Oh, she's a little bitch, that one.

That's right. That's right she is. But we love her. That's why she's back. I was trying to pay attention. That's right. That is Sister Ava, otherwise known as Mistress Ava.

So yeah, so yeah. Right, masturbation month. That's when we do our thing. That's when we stroke it and choke it and admit to it

and confess and say, Lord, I masturbate and I am not ashamed. Exactly. That's right. I mean, even if you didn't do it today, you did it yesterday

or you did it last week. I hope you did it. We hope. And you know, mutual masturbation is also masturbation.

Anytime your fingers do the walking on your own, well, hopefully they're not yellow pages, but they're, you know, pink pages or brown pages or whatever pages your fingers are doing the walking,

it's when you do it to yourself, you know, like my lovely Tranny here. Here we go. She could have a partner or not. Right?

Isn't this cute? Oh my God. That is hilarious. That rocks.

Can I please have one of those? You know, this is a gift which you can play with it. That is fantastic. Yes.

Yes, brothers and sisters, masturbation is a great gift from the gods, the goddess, nature, whatever gave it to us. It is a gift. That's right.

The great Greek philosopher, Diogenes, the cynic, called masturbation a most marvelous blessing of nature if only it were as so easy as to get rid of my hunger for food just by rubbing my stomach, you know,

as it is to satisfy my hunger for sex just by rubbing my gyno, you know. He is Greek, right? Yeah.

Okay. I got to pull my mic down. It's always sliding up. No.

Okay. Pull it down here. Yep. Okay.

There we go. Got to get everything into position. Yes, indeed, brothers and sisters, masturbation is natural.

And yes, as the great Saint George Carlin said, what did he say? If God had intended us not to masturbate, he would have made our arms shorter.

And that's why the Tyrannosaurus Rex was such an angry creature. You know, probably, right? Can you imagine?

Ah! Ah! Ah! You want to eat somebody if you can't touch it.

Ah! And not, you know, consensually. Anyway, we're going to testify to the truth of masturbation, the body, mind, and soul tonight here on Radio Suzy One

on the World Wide Web. World Wide Revolution. World Wide Sexual Revelation. Broadcasting live.

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Of Eden. You see, here's my snake.

Her name is Evie. That's right. Hello. And now I want to introduce some of my other guests.

I've already started, I guess. So I get to play. You could play with Evie a little bit. Here we go.

This is Sister Amour, who is back from, you know, her deathbed or something. What kind of snake is that? And this, I should introduce the voice here,

because people are wondering who is that. The voice of evil. I'm pure evil. Who is that evil man?

Evil, I'm evil, I'm evil, I'm pure evil. Let me get inside you, I'm pure evil. Let me come get you, Dr. Susan Block. I will take you.

I will take you, Dr. Susan Block. Oh my. I am evil. That could almost make me like a horror movie.

Wow. So this is, this is the voice of Hart Fisher. That sounds like such a, you know, a nice kind of neighborhood guy, Hart Fisher.

Honourful student. There you go. Straight A student. How did a nice guy like you become so evil?

Chicago. There you go. And my mother. But they have good pizza, at least.

Amazing pizza and more episodes on gangland than any other city in the United States. And Obama. That's right.

And look at how he's going gangbusters on her rights. But he left. Right, yeah. And yeah, he is.

I mean, all presidents do, right? I mean, power corrupts. And absolute power, you know, makes you forget how important masturbation is.

Right? I mean, that was President Bill who fired Dr. Joyce Lynn Elders. Okay.

And forgot the importance of masturbation when you're in the public eye, like the oval office. Maybe you should just jerk it.

Maybe he wouldn't have gotten in trouble, right? There you go. All right. So we are celebrating masturbation.

Do people, that you are a horror movie, sort of host or something? Well, I own the world's greatest

uncut 24-hour, seven days a week horror channel, American Horrors, at www.filmon.com. That's right, www.filmon.com.

As the host of American Horrors, I bring you nothing but the best in uncut horror. Tomorrow it's uncut dancing videos

in all satanic films. Now, what does all this have to do with masturbation? Yeah.

Well, I changed my entire masturbation life when I got a Prince Albert.

Oh. That's kind of a heart. Wait, I want to know how that works. I'm actually kind of curious.

Does that hurt? Can we see that? Yeah, just not on camera, a little shy. Aw.

I'm a shy, scary guy. Guys, what do we think of that? Tell them no. I want to see that.

I've never seen one in real life. Seven gauge, seven gauge. Prince Albert, seven gauge, thank you. We haven't done the Bonoboville Communion yet.

Let me introduce my other guest then. If you would have shown us your Prince Albert, I would have stuck with you. But I am now going to introduce,

this is not an order, Penny Jean. Penny Jean. And it says Jane, okay. What a pretty name.

And this is Penny's first time. She's a virgin. Shut up, virgin. Yay, welcome in.

So of course I, you know, have to get your name wrong. And then I'll, you know, get it right. And so, you are here.

But, okay, you guys, if you're going to talk, talk. He's so distracting, him and his peers. She's asking me about the PA, the seven gauge.

Maybe I should just put you up on the bed. You should just flounce around. I'm the one who's supposed to do the finishing. Come on, just get up on the bed.

Here she goes, here she goes. Here she goes. Mistress Ava is so obedient. She's beautiful.

That's who's been distracting me, Mistress Ava. Yes, no wonder. She's very demanding. She had to come back for more.

Yeah, okay, so, right down here. She likes my hair. And give her the mic, she can have a mic. So, back, down, down everybody.

She likes my weave. I have a penny. Jean, Jean, Jean. I need a pen.

She's a pen. Pen for penny. So, pen E is brought here by our good friend,

the mysterious, the magical, the award-winning, the unseen, scene maker,

Jack, the zipper. Where is he? I want to meet Jack the zipper, Helen.

Yeah, right. You only know about Jack the Ripper. No, no, I actually know about Jack the zipper because we have a couple of mutual friends

and we're aware of each other's work and I've always wanted to meet him. And he does often come to Bonoboville and one can sometimes

actually see him or perhaps he's a ghost or, you know, you're never sure if it's his double

since he is so very famous he hasn't met him. Jack is at the bar. And he hangs out at the bar, right.

That's the only place he hangs out. The beautiful, speakeasy bar. Yeah, he's at the bar.

So how did you meet Jack? I don't know. I met him in a motel. In a motel.

I like the sound of that. Wow. It sounds like you met him. Was it an audition?

Is it like the couch? Or it was the movie, the actual movie? No. You just met him to do the movie?

No, I never... You never met him? No. All right, well, welcome. Did you masturbate today?

I didn't. You didn't? Well, you're due. Have you had sex? Have you had sex today?

Yeah. How many times? One. How many times did you like to come?

All the time. Wow, that's actually kind of uncomfortable. There's like some sort of South American woman who had this thing where she couldn't stop coming.

And it was very... She got disability for that. I heard recently that someone got brain damage

from oak excessive orgasm. I don't know if that's true or not. How the hell was she doing it? And the snake.

Google it. It's crazy. I will. No, seriously. Give her back to me because you're letting her crawl away.

Which is understandable because you are a virgin. Sorry. She wanted to say hi. I want to play with your snake.

Lay with my snake. Oh, yeah. Lay with my snake. That's a really long snake you got there.

It is. It's not so good on girth. But it's nice and long and it moves really rhythmically.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You could probably knot it up. So this is Odette. Hello.

Odette de la Croix. A little. But my family is French. So I wanted to kind of stick to my roots.

Really? Yeah, a little bit of an ode to French sexuality. And I just want to say that I masturbated for Penny today

and myself. Twice. So one for you because I know you didn't get that in your schedule and then one for myself.

Okay. You were doing it for her and then for yourself. That's very, very giving of your

masturbation. It sort of reminds me of some of these masturbation for Pete's kind of activities that there are, right?

I'm pretty sure I did it for Pete's too. Maybe one of those times. Now a more, you were here at our Drop Bra's Not Bombs

show. Yeah, that was awesome. And it was an awesome show and actually somebody did drop a bomb. Moe, Moe the monster

dropped his bomb on your chest. That's so true. That sounds horrible.

That's a horror movie. It's my kind of horror. It was pure DNA. It was beautiful.

It sounds like pure protein. You know, it was for a good cause. With a little bit of ammonia or whatever. All those different chemicals.

And it all over her chest because she had dropped her bra. Exactly. By the way, wait a second.

Oh, yes, here we go. Actually you dropped two of your bras. Oh, you found my bras. Thank you.

Two bras. I was like, Mommy, I left my bras. So you could

change into them if you want. Although you look great in your corset. I don't know, I wore the vintage piece for you tonight. She's actually more comfortable

when she sits, I think. Yeah? Does she like to sit better? I think she likes to sit. I love that so much. She, he, it,

very confusing. It reminds me of Tiffany Star Show. I miss her.

Your first show here, you were very intimate. She looks like the female wrestler. And I wrote a bicycle. Yes, Tiffany Star.

I miss her. She'll be back. She'll actually be back any day. Hopefully she's listening.

Hi Tiffany. I heard that she was the most downloaded porn star in the Vatican. I heard that too actually.

In the Vatican? Yes, that's what I said. They, of course, download porn. Just like everybody else.

And they happen to have a particular pension for transsexual porn. Imagine that. Yeah, exactly. It makes sense.

When they're running a world-wide child molestation network, imagine that they'd be into transgender porn. You know, I didn't associate that

because I think when you are child molesting, it's got nothing to do with transgender. That's just being political from the radio show.

But you know what? Here it is. It's more the fact that they wear dresses all the time. I think that's what fits.

I just bitch and moan about the Vatican all the time. I think that the child abuse mainly comes from

the deprivation, the condemnation of masturbation as well as

fornication. They're not even allowed to masturbate in peace. Feeling peaceful.

So not only do they have to give up ladies, they have to give up everything. Yeah, I mean, if there's going to be good Catholics, right?

I didn't know they had to give up masturbation. You're not supposed to masturbate. No masturbation at all. I was brought up Catholic.

You were. Can I get somebody to put it on the floor? I feel like all the girls I meet that were

Catholic or went to a Catholic school all say this. Or they're in the porn industry. We have to make up for so many years

of not being able to. Oh, and I don't blame you. I used to hide my dildo in the bathroom

closet that had all the towels in it. And I think one time my mom was changing the towels and found

my dildo and she threw it at my head and it hit my head. Now that is child abuse. That's abuse.

I keep a dildo in my car to hit people. He is not a role model. I just want to say.

It was used in I sold my soul for anal. What good would a light dildo do? Just to say for the light

dildos I had the porn clown posse on here. They did use balloons as dildos.

Did they work? How was that? I think it's a little awkward but if you lube it up enough it pops.

A clown orgasm. Would that be like an interior slap or a spanking inside? I want to say hi to Juicy J.

Say hi to the microphone. How have you been? I've been really fabulous. I'm working on some new music

and doing a benefit show. Gene 2nd, Davalon, Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre M&M. What are you going to bring

Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre over to Bonoboville? I would love that. I will drop

bras not bombs for that. Part two. I think everybody will. But we had two short here

next week. Yeah, Memorial Day weekend. It's going to be our Master Baton Max.

That will be fun. Do you think he's going to naked? Do I think Snoop will get naked? I think Kid Rock will.

Kid Rock, of course. A few shots later. We'll have an American flag on the broadcast bed.

We'll even play country music. Oh yeah. That kind of party. You know, I'm going to

get my everybody say good night to my snake. If you remind me, I'll bring her out. She's tied up in your dress.

Yeah, I know. It's tied up in the dress. Uh-huh. There we go. Here she goes.

Isn't that the story of every take in the world tied up in a pretty dress? Yeah. Right. How did you Master Baton today?

I actually used this tiny little vibrator that I got and I was stuck in traffic

and I've learned the secret to driving in LA is to Master Baton whenever you're in a traffic jam and then when you get into your car

it's like conditioning over and over again. I've become in a really great mood and I love it. I don't know if I want to recommend that.

It has to be bad traffic. Were you just rolling? Rolling at best. I want to be her best friend.

She has good advice. This could turn into one of his horror movies. No, really. Do not Master Baton and drive.

It's probably not as bad as texting though. Is that like drunk driving? Can get like an M.U.I. like Master Baton under influence.

You're going to take it. It'd be public in decency. You'd be label as sex offender. On the other hand

having sex in a car is fun. Having in a parked car or masturbating in a parked car.

Roadhead is awesome. And getting roadhead rocks. No, I'm not recommending that.

You guys, you guys. They're dangerous. Do you tend to have sex in like a Mazda Miata or something?

You don't want to try that. Masturbation education brothers and sisters. We are adults here, right?

And of course this show is for adults only. But, you know, of course a lot of kids listen to it.

Well, at least they're getting educated. Well, that's what we want. We don't want to tell them to be getting roadhead. It's dangerous before parking lot head.

Parking lot head. No kids, roadhead, roadhead. I'm telling you right now. No rise for free.

Sunday. All right, so when's the last time you masturbated? Probably on set.

Yes. Yeah. Because, like, the dude went away for a while and I was like...

Okay, right. Right. And I needed to be serviced, but no one was there to service me.

Right, right. And you wanted to get it going. You know, that's what our fingers are for brothers and sisters.

They are for fluffing ourselves when the need is there. There's no reason to go without. You've always got this.

And actually I talked to a guy that was quadriplegic today and he doesn't have this. So, brothers and sisters, if you have

this, and by this I mean your fingers, take advantage and feel blessed. Yeah, seriously.

Because he can't do that. There are some people that cannot masturbate. You are blessed if you can. Yes.

That's true. And you know, sometimes it's for all different purposes. I mean, it's a sleeping pill. Oh, it pits me to sleep for freaking sure.

When did you masturbate last? With the last toy that you donated to me. Oh.

I love it. The remote one. I gave you a dick. Oh, I gave you some different things. I wish you gave me a dick.

I did give you a dick. I gave you that dildo, that realistic one from SwingTastic. What? Oh yeah, that's right.

I love that thing. I tweeted at them. Hi guys. I love you. SwingTastic is

fantastical. So, all right, so you're, I'm glad you're masturbating with our toys. And we have more toys.

I have it's the month, right? It's the month. It's masturbation month. You kind of have to do it a little more than normal. But the remote control thing,

I gotta say, I love that. I've always wanted to try that. And I finally got it to work. And I love it.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember we gave you that. That's from, I think, Cal Exotics or something. Yeah, it just needs new batteries because it's already like that.

Okay, well, we got some batteries. Who is, tell me again who you are. My name is Rusty Fox. Rusty Fox.

And are you also in the horror business? I'm, you work with, yeah, I'm a comedian. You're a comedian? Yeah. Do you have any masturbation jokes?

Well, bean flicking? Bean flicking. Yeah. You never heard that? A girl flicks her beans. I was thinking of a guy for a second.

That would be kind of small. A bean flicking, yeah, yeah. Bean flicking is one of those things, like pearl polish and, you know,

muff, muff diving would be someone else. That would be... Eitherly would see Rusty in a divo video

in a diaper dancing around. That's where you'd see Rusty. In a divo video in a diaper? Wow, I can picture.

You know, people think I'm being mean, right? No, I think I'd like to let our radio audience know that Rusty is shaped like

a samurai, I guess you'd say? Or, I don't know. Is that what we would say you're shaped like? Or Humpty Dumpty? A sumo.

Yes, not a samurai. Sumo. Right, sumo or Humpty Dumpty? Baby Huey. Baby Huey, there you go. The old cartoon.

Oh, I see people starting to take their clothes off. Okay, so here we go. Yeah.

Oh my God, I just got busted so hard. No, no, that's true. I was making her take her clothes off because I wanted her to put my bra on.

I told her to and Mila caught on her. We're all going to watch the changing of the bra. Doc, this is way better than Larry King.

And I kind of want to see her go still. Way better than Larry King. She's taking off her little tank top now. I love being a woman

because I can undress other women and not be considered like so weird. I love it.

I win. I love being a woman. Suzy, last night I was at the bar

and I was the only girl dancing because I've been, you know, three weeks without drinking any drinks

so I went to the bar after I was after my antibiotics and I was like, whew, and I'm partying and I saw

the greatest looking ass on this girl and I was like, oh, so I went and I grabbed it, of course.

And then later on I was like, oh, and I was like... By the way, don't try that at home either, brothers and sisters. Grabbing an ass in a bar

is only something that you can get away with. That's only something a more can do. It can look like a more. It's only me.

Regular people out there can do that, sorry guys. It's only a woman thing. So you grab this ass

and I was bragging to boys all night I go, I love being a woman. When I see a good looking girl I can grab her and she can't smack me.

I'd be like, I'm five feet tall. What can you do? So I'm like, you know. And then later on

I noticed something and then the guy goes, Amore, that's not a girl. I'm like, oh,

I guess I'm not that great after all. No. Adam Zappel gave it away.

You're attracted to feminine men. Look, it happens. Apparently. Attracted to feminine men

and that's all there is to it. Apparently it's the truth. Alright, it is it's about

a half hour into the show and I don't want to be a bad hostess so I would like to offer my

famous Bonoboville communion. We've been talking about religion tonight and we do communion here

in Bonoboville with our Bonoboville Jell-O shots made by Jell-O Jell-O shots

LA Jell-O shots LA brothers and sisters and so we've got all different flavors tonight.

This is exciting. Well, I think it's like lime and mango and margarita flavor

I want to try the lime. That sounds delicious. Out of her boobs. Okay, well come right up here

Sister Amore. Come on up. We have to de-virginize these two girls. Absolutely.

I want the full initiation. Don't threaten. Look at these two hot blondes

just coming forward. Here they come. Two hot blondes and black

brothers and sisters. Two hot blondes and black. I just saw Jack speaking of black and Jack don't you get near my cameras.

Oh, and we actually have a lot of food. But get on a microphone, Jack. Get on a microphone. I like this.

We have a little nylon on. Okay, here they come. We have Amore Baby Block

Hilton. Of course, I have a Hilton in the family. Right. I have a Lubkovitz and a Hilton.

And where is the mic? Let's see. Microphone, I need the microphone. Where's this?

Ah, yes. Okay, can you come over here and put the microphone here? So you can do that.

Here we go. We need the salt. Can I get the salt, please? And this is the lovely Odette.

And by the way, we also have someone on the line for Odette. Is he on the phone or on Twitter?

He's on the phone, Brad. Can we put Brad on? He has a question for Odette. And we have

a microphone here. I'll hold this and you can sprinkle some salt on the nipples

and then do your suck. And how are you doing, Odette? Oh, I'm doing very great. It's getting better every second.

Okay. And do we have Brad on the line? Hello, Brad. Is he still here?

Okay, so we have salty titties now. Yes, they're all titties too. There's not much boobage, but there's a lot of titties. And this is what we call the

Bonobo Bill communion where we salt the titties. It looks like cocaine, but please don't snort it because it's going to be painful.

It is salt. Okay, and Amore is now going to suck the nipples of the salt, right?

Here we go. Be thorough. And then down with the Jell-O shot. From Jell-O shot LA. She's going to get a little off

with her fingernail. She wants to do the Jell-O shot first and then the salt. Oh, she's preparing.

That's what fingernails are for. Is that a professional score? I love this. This is my favorite type of shot.

Two nipples. I like that too. I agree. It's my favorite too. Yeah, okay. I think she's ready.

Okay, go for it. My second favorite shot has become She's talking. Would you like

to have the lime? She's got the lime in her mouth and now she's going to lick

lick the nipples. Suck. And those are some hard nipples.

It's not the only thing. Amore is amusing us with how she can do this. Dr. Susie, you don't have a caller, Susie. Here we go.

Let's have him on. Put him on. I can't hear him. Brad?

Ask for him and he won't speak. That's why we kept talking. Is he a little shy? Brad, are you there?

Brad, I hope you're there. This woman tastes delicious. Okay. Well,

I don't think so. I think the bra looks much better around her waist, right? I can wear it as a little waist inch.

A little belt. But now, Amore, I think you have to return the favor and don't hurt yourself.

I would like to do that. Return the favor, darling. Here we go. Yeah, okay.

I'll do it better. I'll do it better. And so now you're going to get a hand position.

And here comes the lovely booms of Amore. And where's the salt? Salt?

Who's got the salt? Where did the salt go? Where did the salt go? Here it is.

I have a salty substitute. You do. Can I hear you calling? Hello?

Well, if you can get it out before she sprinkles the salt on. Susan? Yeah, exactly. Then she'll lick that up, baby.

Dr. Susie? Yes. All around that... Right? Right there.

You're next, woman. Yeah, I'm looking at you. I'm looking at the virgin. I'm looking at your titties.

We hope you're studying how to do this. You want me to do that right there? I thought you wanted me out of your boob.

Liliana, Liliana. What's your name? Liliana. Brad, are you there, Brad? Okay.

Yeah. Are you going to do the look monohand? Okay. I can try. I need help.

I have no help. Just lick around the rim. I'm helpless. I don't really have a producer tonight.

Brad, can you hear us? Yes. Lick around the rim. And she's licking.

All around the rim. And down the hatch. I don't know this. You see, you didn't do it with your finger like a jello thing.

You got excited backstage? You're so delicious, though. You guys are driving them nuts backstage. Can we get both nips?

Yeah, baby. I think you should double check. Oh, yeah. You don't want to leave her with salty nips?

No. Very nice. Very nice. So, let's hear it for

our lovely ladies. Yeah. Lovely ladies. Absolutely.

The lovely ladies. That was awesome. Now, I don't mean to deny the men if they get a partner to do this with.

Oh? Well, I mean, I'm just saying, if you want to get your guy to do it with you, you know.

But, yeah, I mean, and then we also... Body shot? Oh, here comes Juicy.

Oh, he's like, ah, I won't do this. Juicy, woo! Oh, man. Juicy is tall enough.

She tastes so good. Yeah. How does this work? This is the bonobo

We're going to put some salt on our nips. Where's the salt? Okay, the salt has...

Here, there it is. Sprinkle it on our nips. Well, you need to suck the nip first. So it sticks.

Do you know this, ma'am? No. We're meeting as we speak. He just sort of went up to you.

Is this okay with you? This is okay. You're in luck, Juicy. It's a nice introduction.

It made the move. I have to check in about this stuff. Put the salt over there, I think.

Yeah, okay, over there. All right, and here he goes. Go for it, go for it. Take one of these.

Okay. And around. And you know... How are you doing?

Oh, look, he's a professional too. Here he goes. Here he goes, here he goes. Oh, wait, he did the amour.

Luck my hands? I didn't hear what you said. I'll run that boom, boom, boom chair. Are you ready for me?

I'm ready for you. I like her. I want to see this woman right now. Yeah, this is...

Penny Jean, brothers and sisters. She's so beautiful. Is ascending the stage, and she is a protege

of Jack the zipper. Did Jack get a microphone out there yet? Anybody have a mic on, Jack? At the bar?

Max? Captain Max. Oh, look at this outfit. Lovely silver pants.

Wait, we might need it. Wait, wait, wait. We might need to do this a little bit differently. How are we doing it differently?

I don't drink. Oh, okay. You don't have to. So I want to be a table of licking.

Yeah, you will be the table of licking. Okay, so come here. So someone needs to ingest. Right.

Would you like to choose someone to do that? Because I think anyone you choose would want to. One of the titties. Yeah, that one right there.

Smart choice. I volunteer myself. Yes, here she comes, brothers and sisters. Baby block.

Amor Hilton. This is the part where... Baby block loves beautiful women. Right.

So this is the part where you do a little striptease. You should stand up though for that. And we should have a little bit of music. Right, do we have any?

It's going to be really complex. It's going to be really complex striptease. Complex, go ahead. We have Penny Jean doing a complex

striptease for Bonoboville. And you can start in any moment now. Wow. Look at that body of brothers and sisters.

I don't wear a bra. I know that bra. I don't wear it. And she has her nipples pierced.

That is so hot. It's going to be really complicated. What gauge are the piercings? You should take the boots off.

Nipple piercings, what gauge are they? Nipple piercings are hot as hell. What gauge are those piercings? Ask her, what gauge are they?

Gauge. What gauge are you? My nipples? Yes.

Regular? I don't know. Perfect. I have to get my meds out. Oh, her meds are in her boot, brothers and sisters.

No, no, no. The nipple piercing. The nipple piercing. Do you keep your meds in your boots? I don't keep my meds in my boot.

Maybe my boobs up, but not my boots out. I keep her meds in my boot, too. We've got boots on the floor. Some people have boots on the ground.

This is boots on the floor. And socks, also. Anybody out there got a fetish for women in athletic socks?

Here we go. White athletic socks. They are something else. I just had to get a shot

from a pierced nipple girl. Oh, okay. Here she goes, brothers and sisters. I have mine pierced as well.

This is such a body, brothers and sisters. What a beautiful girl. Oh, my goodness. What was that?

Oh, I wanted to see her nipple pierced. She said she had her nipple pierced, too. Girls with nipple pierced are so hot. This is the kind of girl you want to take on a road trip with you.

All you need is a pack of markers. Oh, wow. Here we go, brothers and sisters. Where do I get a body?

Yeah. All right. And here she is. You are so goddamn sexy.

Oh, and I love the fact that you have a little bush. Look at that. I have a bush, too. But you have a bush, you know?

She's like a nature girl, right? Sort of like made by, you know, Darwin or something. It matches. You're very beautiful.

And different, I guess, than the conventional beauty. She reminds me of kind of like a way more exotic, beautiful like way on a writer kind of deal.

She looks very beautiful. But without the shoplifting. Just a glifting. But the pills, right.

The girl interrupted thing. Winona might keep her pills in a boot, right? I keep my pills in a boot. Right, okay, okay.

So look at this body. Where should we take the shot? There's multiple options to receive alcohol. She's the virgin.

Oh, but that would mean I'd be taking a Jell-O shot early in the show. Should we risk that? Yes.

Yes. You can do it. You can do it. You can do it.

This show is already out. Hotty shots. Okay, you can talk me into it. There are multiple locations to choose from.

That means you should... I have an ass underneath here too. You have an ass. It's useful.

You can keep things in it. You know, I think the nipple, it's very classic, right, for the Bonoboville communion.

This is what we do here. We're a little religious about it. I mean, some people do an ass, and I warn you, or a dick, right?

We might, we could do a Prince Albert, but the classic is the nipple. This is our communion, brothers and sisters, because, you know, I mean,

sometimes religious organizations have a good idea. I mean, the bad idea is the idea of telling you

you're not allowed to do just about every form of sex, except procreation. But the good idea is bringing people together through rituals,

right? I mean, that's kind of fun. Song and ritual and love and charity and empathy and beauty,

and that's, you know, what we try to do here without telling you how to masturbate. There are many ways to masturbate.

Well, we will tell you how to masturbate, but it's up to you, you know? Okay, so, yeah. Yeah, great.

Okay, so I'm ready to get started. You are ready, so I'm just moving the microphone so that, okay, so now sit up kind of straight here, okay?

And you hold the jello shots. Okay, and you want to finger one out for me there? How about,

let's see, what color? I guess the green goes the best with my outfit right at the moment, yeah. Okay, and...

But I think your knees should be down, right? Yes. All right, and the gorilla can hold you in his arms.

How about the gorilla holds you in his arms. Okay, and you hold that in your teeth, right?

Okay, and now I'm... Here we go. Just put your hands at your sides.

Okay, here we go. Mmm, such a beautiful what is it?

It's the body of Jesus, right? I mean, that's what you eat in Catholic Communion. Yes, body of Christ.

Body of Christ. Right? Body of Christ. Thank you, Odette. It's kind of, I mean, it's not exactly Christ, but

there's something Christ like about her, right? I mean, she's exactly... Can you put the mic over to her? I'll get down on my knees. It's exactly

Christ. It's Christ, she says, with the it's just such an honor. I'm just so, I'm so happy.

You're about to put your mouth on my nipples. I am. Oh, my God, I'm going to die right now. Uh-oh. Christmas

Boom sheeva shambalay. What? Looks like cocaine. Could be.

Is it not? No FBI, no LAPD. You sue me, you raid me, I sue you.

It's salt. Not about salt. That's a one salty altar for Satan, eh?

It's very salty. Oh, and I forgot this part. I can't do it like I'm more. I have to actually lift it. And I am healed.

I don't hear you, I don't hear you. malters black magic heal I'm going to get a little bit back.

I'm going to get a little bit back. The line in the coconut. The devil's in the coconut.

Alright, she has been divergenized. On this show, is that they first? Well, it's her first time on the show.

Show's early. And, uh, You know, it's funny how a lot of people like to hold the microphone between their legs as if, you know, it's pussy-ton. They feel. They like it.

Yeah. Okay, now. You have sampled your Bonobo-ville communion, and you did very well. Thank you.

It's a little wet. Yeah, I know, it's a little wet. Good. You did very well. So, you know, we're getting towards kind of the last, kind of, part of the show.

Last half hour, it's like three half hours, right? So, we talk and we commune, and now, of course, we have to celebrate masturbation month. Uh-oh. Right?

So, are you ready? I'm ready to get my name for the day. All right. So, now we need to discuss, before we do, or maybe not.

I mean, what way would you like to masturbate? We have a Sybian. We have a Hitachi. We have other personal toys that we could give you.

I want to know. I want to know. I want to know. She's ridden into our, uh, the, the, what do you want?

Have you ridden the Sybian? I have never ridden the Sybian. You have never ridden the Sybian? Oh, my God.

Would you like to try it? It's my moment. Yes. I would like to try it.

Okay, okay, very good, very good. All right. So, uh, brothers and sisters, we are going to have a Sybian ride for masturbation month. Woo-hoo.

Would you like to come up here and sort of help with the ambiance? She's going to love that. Okay. So, um, so here we go.

Yeah. Yeah. Here we go. Oh, there's a jealous shot on the floor.

I'm just about, I'm, I just have to say one thing. Uh, my mom's listening right now and, uh, I'm sorry mom. Aw, is she really? What religion did you grow up with?

None. None? No, my mom was. You're like, you're not even Hindu or, or Wiccan?

We play witchcraft in the, in the forest. I'm from Washington state. So was it a, it was kind of a witch goddess religion? Just in the forest.

Cool. Well, she brought you upright. Yeah. So.

Okay. Sorry mom. All right. So now.

Bush. You are going to get, you're going to straddle this basically. Uh, yeah, you straddle this. Um, yeah.

Okay. I'm ready. So you straddle it this way? Yeah, I got that.

You put your little, you know, put your cookie in. Yeah. No shit. Okay.

So here she goes. Uh-oh. She's mounting the Sybian. It's a little bit like mounting a force or something.

Yeah. It's not on yet. So first you get yourself situated. Right.

Okay. You want to hold the mic for me? Yeah. Cause I've got the controls here.

Cause I'm so controlling. She seems locked in. She's in place. She looks like she's riding a keg.

A keg. Like a keg of beer that vibrates. Oh, this is way, way better than keg. And I want you to know.

Yes. Measure B people. We are Measure B compliant. This is a fresh sheet of.

I see the. Saran wrap. The giant dental dam all over it. Saran wrap.

So many uses. Thank you Dr. Sousa Block. This is the Sybian brothers and sisters. Right.

So many uses. And it has not wrapped a sandwich. It is just there to. Provide a thin layer.

Here put the mic up to her face. I just sit here and receive pleasure. Whoa. My face.

No, no, no, no, no. It gets better. It gets better. It gets better.

I'm sorry mom. Holy shit. That does the job. Yeah.

It's doing it, baby. Yeah. How much to purchase? Better than husband.

Yeah. That's a $1,300 thing. I've only gone halfway. It's upgrading.

It's upgrading. Yeah. Oh, okay. Here we go.

I don't even have to do anything. She is riding it. Yeah. Exactly.

Yeah. That's a smile. Yeah. For the masturbation month.

Yes. My pussy is going to fall off. Right. Surrounded by that.

Are you a teacher? Chattering. Whoa. Okay.

Right. What a tease. You want it all the way? Yeah, all the way.

All the way. You ready for it? Whoa. I love watching girls for the first time.

It's so hot. Here she goes. Give her a little flap. They should give you a mouth guard.

Marry masturbation month. Bring the tooth. Sister Penny. Whoo.

You can do it. You need an umbrella in the crowd. That was beautiful. Okay, we're going to come.

We're going to come. Sister Penny. Testify. That you masturbate.

And you are not ashamed. She is masturbating. Riding masturbation. I like her.

She's not ashamed. I want to be best friends with this jerk. Okay. I like the gentle reach for the submission of the styles there.

That's great. Second round? Yeah, she wants round two. The robots are replaced.

Let's hear it for Sister Penny. That was hot. Whoa. No, that was incredibly hot.

Oh, yeah. Did you like that? From here. That was so hot to watch.

Did you like that? Okay, we got to get a microphone. Can you hear me? I'm just going to take this home with you.

You're going to take that. That thing is bigger than your little body. That is the best product endorsement I've ever seen. Can I leave now?

Like, I'm ready. Come on. Aw, how can I refuse? But I want your protege on.

I got this mic. Maybe he'll... Do you have a mic for him? A mic to...

Oh, you have a mic. Oh, say hi. Doc. We are about to hear from the voice of Jack.

What's cracking? Have you ever ridden a civilian, by the way? Oh, I have. Many a time.

It's a... It's my favorite horse to ride. The black stallion. Yeah.

So, Jack. Yeah. Are you there? I can't...

Testing. Check. So, we love your latest discovery, Penny Jean. I know.

Seriously. She is not only incredibly beautiful, but sexy as fuck. Holy crap.

Yes, indeed. Yeah, she's good people, right? Yeah, I definitely want to be best friends with her. Yeah, Hillbillies make the best porn stars.

Say it again. Hillbillies make the best porn stars, right? Atlanta! Atlanta, Georgia!

You look like a Kentucky girl. Atlanta, Georgia, really? Hey, I love your airport. They have a smoking lounge upstairs.

Yeah, they do. They do. Yeah, anybody. Everybody in Atlanta, Georgia.

That's really random. He's listening right now. I think that's only one in the United States, actually. It is.

So, Jack. Yeah. Mary masturbation month. Yeah, cheers to that.

Yeah, Mary masturbation month, Jack. I'll keep that in mind. Yeah. It's for 30 days.

Did you know it was masturbation month? I do know that. Yeah, have you been celebrating? Yeah, but nobody celebrates it like you.

I think you're putting the icing on the cake. Wait a second here. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can't hear.

Thank you for... Okay, so somehow it wasn't coming into my headphones. I'm sanitizing right now. Hello.

So, whoa. So, are you masturbating? Who? What?

Jack, are you masturbating? Penny masturbates for me. No, no. I think she's...

I masturbate for you. Is she cuddling with this right now? Are you pulling her near? I'm realizing it.

She's hovering over. Oh, you're making her like herself? Licking up her own juices. Uh-oh.

Penny Jean's making moments. I found my new two best friends forever. Your view was blocked by that big bald head there. Yeah, okay.

That's why I couldn't hear him in the headsets. So, how come you can't put his voice in the headsets? Oh, okay. I see.

I love you, Jack. All right, Jack. I love you too. So, it's great to have you on the show,

like, at least in voice, if not in body. Thank you. And she...Penny is here. Her body has been sacrificed for your lack of disclosure of yourself.

I'm keeping the bar...the bar stool is warm for you. Aw. I'm watching this show on the monitors. Yeah.

It looks really good tonight. It does. The lighting's amazing tonight. Yeah.

The girls are amazing. Your energy is perfect. It's too bad that it's not scratch and sniff, because it smells delicious.

It looks like it is, though. You can scratch it. It's okay. You can scratch it.

Yeah, when I scratch it, there's even more to sniff. I'm sorry, mom. Beautiful. Well, when Penny Jean flew out to visit this time around,

it was just... I felt the need to bring her to meet you. I'm glad you felt that need, brother Jack. That need was put in you.

It's just a simple... By the spirit of sex. Yeah, as simple as that. The power of Satan.

Satan. Satan. She needed to celebrate masturbation month with us, because she had never ridden a Sybian,

and that is an important experience for a girl like her to have. I like high-end masturbation, too. This is $1,300 masturbation. Yes, this is $1,300 masturbation.

That is correct, sister. I really enjoy high-end masturbation. You're a simple girl, but you appreciate the finer things. I do.

Hey, Doc. Yes. I asked Penny Jean to grow her fur out over the telephone. Yeah, he's the reason why.

And she did it. That says everything. You have also grown your fur? I did.

Oh, my goodness. This year, I will show it off. It's a full bush on the top. Party area is kept clean.

Wow. Party area is kept clean. Here she is. Look at these two beautiful girls.

You're welcome for that segue. We have some music. Wait, you have more clothes on? Oh, here she goes.

DJ. We need the music so she can strip for Josh Hadley who's watching at home because you're dirty bastard. Josh Hadley, you're dirty bastard.

I know you're watching. Okay, I guess we're not getting music. Okay, she can just take off her. Whoa, look at that push.

Wow. Yeah, it's good. I'm so happy Penny Hose made it come back. Yes, look at that.

You know, it's so, you never can tell by looking at a girl on the outside what's going to be on the inside in terms of that bush. This is a glorious bush, I might say.

Can we hear it for Sister O'Dette? Amen. Because she's got a beautiful little body. I mean, can you stand up together because you two ladies

have this sort of similar look. It's like they're the blonde and the net versions of these just tiny little bodies. It's the double bush twins.

The double bush twins. These tiny little bodies. I guess the seven Ds are back. Right?

Double bush twins powers activate. Their powers combine. Morphine. Oh, yeah.

Orgasms activate. Let's see something there on my face. Okay, yes. So how come you like bush so much, Jack?

Because when I was a kid riding my bike in the woods, I would come across mountains of old playboys and penthouses and they were all, you know, melted from the rain and you'd peel them open

and they'd crackle apart and the girls had fur. And what year was this? Can we know? It was a while ago, you know.

It was before the 90s, right? Like the 80s. Dude, I got busted for stealing a penthouse out of a mailbox on my birthday.

Tracy Lawrence. And they had bush. Unless it was airbrush bush. Well, if you've ever had a girlfriend with fur,

I mean, that's it. You're sold for life. You'll watch it from the corner for a while before I join in.

I think the bushes are coming back, too. Thank God. But not too much bush. No, that's good.

No, no, just a little bit. I did a lot of bush eating in southern Illinois. I picked a lot of zizi top beard out of my teeth from doing that.

Ladies, keep those bushes short. Thank you. Please, please, keep them short. It gets stuck in your teeth for days, please.

For the gentlemen that go down on you, do that for them, because we need that. I hear people sobbing in here. That is hearts.

I'm telling you the truth. That is hearts. Personal predilection. Personal experience.

Which he has allowed you, but some people like a lot of hair. The only kind of bush that I will not tolerate is George. Yes!

Woo! Amen! You're going to do a jello shot for that one. Yeah, really.

Hey, Doc. Doc. You know, that's the only kind of bush. But some people like them trimmed.

Some people like them all over the place. Trimbing. Like a beard. Doc, isn't it true?

And some people like them bald. Doc, isn't it true that the girls' pheromones are on the front? Like a Catholic priest.

Yes. So, Jack. Yes. What is the project that you're doing with Penny Jean right now?

We're just hanging out. That project. We're just hanging out. We're shooting.

I'm curious. Who are you signed with, honey? I don't know. I don't remember.

You don't remember. Oh, Amore is going to get her beautiful nails for Hollywood's social light nail into you. Whoa, what was that?

What was that? You know, she met Jack in a motel. She went to get excited backstage every once in a while. Shit.

No more weed for the sound man. This is very bad. I can't hear with these. And it's very staticky.

So, yeah. All right. So, Jack, I didn't hear what the project, or is there a project?

No, we're just hanging out. And having fun. And shooting a little for fun, but we're going to work on,

we got a secret project we're going to try and launch in August. So, we needed to meet, get to know each other. She needed to come to LA

and have a relaxing five days instead of the industry five days. I'm on vacation right now. Yeah.

And how did you make her masturbate? How did I what? Didn't you say you made her masturbate? No.

Oh. I didn't say that, but I could. Wait. What did I do?

What did I do? I asked her to grow a fur. I didn't do it this time. Oh, you masturbated him.

I swear I didn't do it this time. You mean you gave him a handjob? No, I used my pussy. You used your pussy to masturbate him.

You know what? I don't think, I mean, I have a very wide definition of masturbation,

but I don't know that using your pussy to masturbate a cock would fit. That goes into the realm of

copulation, which is fine, but it's just not masturbation. I don't think. Yeah, give it a name.

Unless you could masturbate while you're fucking. You know, you could like, like say, you're rubbing.

In a different way. And now I realize that I'm a really big slide. I thought I was just masturbating dudes

with my pussy. Shit. You live and learn. Now you guys start charging extra.

Way to trash her dream, Dr. Susan Block. Evil queen of mean. So, what do you masturbate to?

Do you masturbate to horror stuff? Fuck, no, are you fucking crazy? I mean, trimmed bush, right? Definitely some trimmed bush.

I like a lot of the stuff on kink.com. I do love the old penthouse. I love kink. I think kink is the hottest site,

honestly. And I've worked for them. Hi kink. Uh-oh.

See, I think the last time I met there was so many things though. I mean, do you like spanking or cuckold or?

Well, me personally, I was like, in doing hard bondage. I was like,

entire core bondage. I love that. So, Jack, when you masturbate, what do you masturbate to?

Do you want a fake answer or the truth? The truth. I don't let myself masturbate anymore.

I like to build my chi energy until I'm with a girl. Is that crazy? No, I mean,

so when's the last time you masturbated? This morning. I was lying just now. Every guy, yeah.

No, you know what? You know, some guys masturbate and they don't come. You don't have to come.

That's what I do. Yeah, I heard that before too. I mean, I think everybody masturbates. Even if you're doing it

when you're with another person in between scenes, you know, you're going from one position to the other and you go, shake, shake, shake it.

Touch it, touch it. I mean, you've got to keep things going, right? I mean, there's always a way for your hand to help, right?

Right, right, right. Right. It's your best friend. Yeah.

A wise woman once said, when you grow older, you realize you have two hands. One for helping yourself.

And one for helping others. So Jack, when you masturbate, do you like think about the themes of your movies or something totally different?

No, I just think about all the stuff I like, you know, and the people I like. Okay.

And that's it. So what about these people? What do you like about the Speak Easy? What do you do here?

Why are you here all the time? Well, I mean, it's obvious that it's, it shouldn't exist in 2013, Los Angeles, but somehow it does.

What, this place, Bonoboville? Yeah, right. It shouldn't exist? In 2013, LA, this shouldn't exist,

but somehow y'all make it happen. Hey, it can only exist in 2013, because that's what year it is. And that's when it's happening,

is right now, and every moment is a moment to celebrate. And this happens to be masturbation month.

So we're celebrating. Well said. With these two gorgeous girls in my bed. It is that you have the way.

And they taste terrible. I mean, these bushes are really nice. Brad wants to know, can we get him on the phone?

I couldn't hear him. Okay, well, we couldn't hear him because everybody's probably talking so much. So you want to get him back on?

Is he on? What do you think we're going to do? Okay, Brad, if you're listening, you can call, but no,

I don't think that Odette is available for a private one-on-one call. Uh-oh. Unless you, you know,

give her your credit card or something, right? Uh-huh, uh-huh. So, you will give him a private one-on-one call, Nick.

Nick will give you a private one-on-one call, Brad. All right. So there, you know. Go get him, Nick.

You can celebrate masturbation month with Nick. Whoo! Yeah. Who is actually one of our great therapists

here at the Institute. That's right. And you might see Ashley wandering around tonight. She's also one of our therapists.

And so is Liliana. So, uh, we are here for you. Just in case you need a little help, a helping hand celebrating masturbation month, right?

You know, a little guided masturbation. Or, you know, maybe you need to free yourself to celebrate yourself. And, you know, I mean, it's okay not to come.

It's okay to hold back from ejaculation and orgasm because orgasm is a great experience. And I'm, I'm really a, you know, I'm into orgasms myself. Throw in a little cockroach.

But I understand that some people like to hold off, especially guys. I think, you know, women can never have too many orgasms. What do you mean?

People prefer edging over orgasming? Edging, right. Hell, yeah. Yeah.

A lot of guys like to go, I wonder why? Why? You wonder why?

Because they want to save it up so they can, I like go to sleep like a baby. They can drop a big load on your chest. Miss Bukaki.

Yeah, that's why. Miss Bukaki. Oh, also because the feeling, you know, it, it, you're making it last.

Do you like to do that? Is that what it is, Jack? Edge play? Yes.

We got your number. You know, I mean, it's like a tantric thing. Except I think the tantric has to go a little far by saying you're never allowed to ejaculate.

I think you should ejaculate every once in a while. Edge play is for people with more brain power because the brain is the true sex organ of everything. The mind is it.

Well, you know, I'm not going to get value judgment about it. I think there's a lot of smart people that like to come a lot. And there's nothing wrong with that. You can be smart and come a lot.

It's not like edge play is only for smart people. It's not about being smart. It's not about being smart. But a lot of people,

and actually I know of you, Hillbillies that are into edge play, believe me. Hillbillies. Yeah.

All kinds. I didn't mean that. It makes the best born stars. The mind is the true sex organ.

Although you're right, in general, in general that, you know, if we did a little sort of IQ test, maybe the edge players might be a little bit

in general sort of higher IQ. So, you know, it's all about delayed gratification. But, you know, the extreme of delayed gratification is not good. But isn't it great to just hover on the edge?

I mean, the thing is, like, you get really close to, like, coming and you're, like, right on that edge and you sustain that

and you sustain, like, being on the verge in a suspense film where you're waiting for the bomb to go off. It's not going off.

That's what the edge play is really about. It's not just, oh, I want to be on the edge. You're extending your pleasure

in that moment of pleasure as long as you can before you pop over the edge. But I have a question now.

I did that before. And then an A-Women. But I have a question. Although there is a point of, you know,

where it has lost return. Sometimes you can hold back so much you kind of lose it. I totally get that.

That's timing. You're talking about timing, like, comedy. I'm trying to ask, though. Like, when you edge, though,

like, what satisfaction do you get off of the edging as, you know, you're saying? Because you get to ride the wave. You're on that.

Instead of orgasming? No, no. As a man, though, as a man. Because when a man has an orgasm,

it's over. Yeah, when the dude has the orgasm, it's, eh, okay, I'll sleep it by. I need a sandwich.

And you're done. And when you're on the edge, you're extending your pleasure. That's the whole point of why I did the Prince Albert.

I was extending my own pleasure. It wasn't about anybody else. I was being a selfish prick. And it did joke, dun-dun-dun.

But the idea of edge play is that you're extending your orgasm as a man because you can't, like, just immediately do it again like a woman can.

It certainly helps with all you premature ejaculators out there. That's right. You guys that are quick on the trigger,

try some edge play. All right, so I know you've written a Sybian. But it is a masturbation month. And we did just put a new saran wrap on there.

So Jack, are you still there? Yes. Jack the zipper, we're going to have a Sybian ride to celebrate masturbation month.

Jack is going to do a Sybian ride? And have you seen this beautiful girl, this lovely little blonde here, Odette Delacroix? I see Odette Delacroix on my Facebook page every day.

Yes. Oh, I'm sure you did. Very French. And perhaps you should put her into one of your movies,

a cinéma. Well, I mean, all you can do is ask. All you can do is ask. Yes.

She's got fur. Yes. She does have fur. She has quite a bit of fur.

Thank you. That's a very small amount of fur, honestly. She's almost got more fur on her puss than she does. Can somebody help?

Go pussy surfing in Champaign, Illinois. That's some serious, easy cop fur. I have no help tonight. Yes, you do.

Here she comes. Baby blocker. Here she is. Little tutu.

Little alia. Alia, move this into the center here. And yes, there we go. Very nice.

Except this is the wrong way. It needs to be turned around. Very nice. I love that corset.

That's sexy. Pull this out from under. Out from under. Very sexy.

Okay. And now you are ready to ascend the throne. What a beautiful name, Odette. Oh, thank you.

My dear Penny Jean, can you hold the microphone so that Odette can feel free to react and respond and allow her emotions to pour forth in celebration of the holiday. This is the first time she wrote my Sybian. Oh, you're going to like this.

This is like a treat. Look, she's getting confused now. She's starting to not know what English is anymore. And now we've just started the vibe.

Train of thought lost. Hold it. You hold it for her so she doesn't have to hold it. Hold it for me because my hands are cold.

See, she's down to Twitter posts. She might want her hands to like play with her bush here. Yeah, you could just kind of do a little extra playing. Oh my gosh.

You could, you know, kind of feel her ass. What do you like on your ass? Squeezing or spanking or squeezing? Squeezing.

Squeezing. Squeezing. Sweet little, pretty little ass. Oh my gosh.

I do it all. I know you would. Yes. Yes.

Yes. Go for it. I want the full treat. There we go.

I know. Call the light. Come on. That's up there.

Edging. Edging. Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

That's cool looking. This never gets old. No. It certainly doesn't, brothers and sisters.

Uh-oh. We never get tired of watching a pretty girl on the Sybian celebrate and masturbation month. Yes.

Hallelujah. Christ is risen again every time we watch a pretty girl ride the Sybian. Oh, yes.

That's a beautiful thing. Look at that lady. Look at that lady. Beautiful thing.

Beautiful thing. Riding on the Sybian. Riding on the Sybian. Beautiful thing.

She's coming. She's coming. She's first in the race. She's coming in on the finish line.

She's coming on the finish line. Riding the Sybian horse, the blonde beauty is riding. And I am not ashamed. She's coming.

She's coming. She's coming. She's coming. She's coming.

She's coming. Hallelujah. Come for us, sister. Come for us.

Look at that face. Oh, oh, oh, oh. That is a beautiful thing. Thank you, Dr. Susan Block here.

Wonderful human being. Wonderful human being, Dr. Susan Block. Whoa! Thank you.

I think that was a wonderful thing. I think we have orgasm, Houston. And let's have a hand. We have liftoff.

We have liftoff. We made it. We made it. Yes.

She has safely orgasmed. We did our job. Woo! Yeah.

Wow. That was exciting. I just have to say that was hot as hell. Your turn.

That was very hot. That was a beautiful thing. Your turn. No, seriously.

I think I can talk now. It is getting hot in here. I am hot now. Woo!

So, I should invite the men to ride the Sybian if they want. The prostate thing? Is that what's going on? Rusty, get up there.

Oh my God. No, I don't know. Rusty has to masturbate. Okay.

So ladies, would you like a personal toy? Oh, yes. There's options, too. There's options, yes.

We have different options. Let me put this down for a second. They're fun. She always has the best toys.

I love it. Every time I go home, I'm like, I have no toys for the guests. Okay. Make up your mind.

Make up your mind. Just because it's masturbation month, it's not like Christmas under the tree. Okay. It's Christmas.

Oh, you've got to put that on. Yeah, I'm going to put this on. It's a neon party. Party, vibrate, necklace.

An OG. Yeah. Okay. Accessory.

Yeah. In fact, I'm wondering if that is a Phil. Wait a second. Yeah, Phil.

It's Phil. After both of those ladies. Phil Varone. Yeah, I think he makes these two.

Yeah, well, I love fucking Phil Varone. We love fucking Phil Varone. Phil Varone, if you're listening to this right now, I love you so much. I love fucking you.

I'm serious. Yeah. Yeah, I'm serious. Phil Varone.

Phil Varone, I love you. Come on back and you'll come back on the show when he's here. We love Phil Varone. Okay.

So open it up. Yeah, he was here for, he was in Atlanta for Real Swingers Atlanta and I was real swinging in Atlanta. So what did Santa bring you under the tree?

He's a rock star. He's a rock star. Like Juicy Jay, but different. Yeah.

Oh, look at this. Does it smell nice? Does it need batteries? Nope.

It's pink. Oh, it had a little plastic thing, so it wouldn't explode like a bomb. Uh-oh. It's on.

It's mental make you explode like a bomb. Yeah, look at that. It's the ball you're driving. I have a new necklace and it masturbates for me.

Masturbation Day at Disneyland. A masturbating necklace. You know, this is convenient. Not that I approve of doing it in the car, but it could just travel with you.

And American Horror is a masturbating necklace as the crucifix. Because it is now a satanic Sunday. Yeah. Thank you, my Obama.

Very nice. It's nice that you both got pink things. Yeah. Oh, there we go.

Oops, let's move this here. And what are we doing? This is way better than being on Jerry Springer. Let me tell you, Doc, I'm very happy to be here.

Have you been on Jerry Springer? He's been on a lot of them. I've been on Larry King, Jerry Springer. There was a protest march on my home on CNN.

This is way better. Thank you, Doc. At least as sensational, but much more peaceful. It's much more loving.

It's about the love. That's right. We're all about love. We practice the bonobo way of peace through pleasure and, you know, technology.

And nobody's yelling at me through a megaphone. Oh, no. That's my normal thing. Just on microphones.

Look at that. And we happen to have some great beauties here tonight. Can we have some applause for our beautiful girls? Jack, thank you for bringing the lady, Jack.

Yes. Jack, thank you, wherever you are. Jack, thank you. Yes, thank you, Jack.

Thank you. And thank you, Odette, for bringing yourself. Good talent scout. Oh, yeah.

Good talent scout. Oh, we have to have you back, my darling. Great pussy. Look at that pussy.

It just makes you wonder if it's ever going to fit in that. You know, but... See, masturbation can be done with a friend. Yes.

No doubt. Helping hand. Well, is it now masturbation or is it just, I don't know, manipulation? Well, manipulation.

That implies... This is what I would call a mutual masturbation kind of thing. Mutual masturbation could be you're both masturbating and looking at each other. Or it could be you're masturbating each other.

You shouldn't really be helping each other out. That's really what humanity's about, helping each other out. You've got to be a shit thing going on. That's why you're all into evil.

You figured me out. There's a lot of possibilities. You figured him out. Figured me out, dammit.

That's right. You really, you know, you're probably a frustrated preacher. Oh, I'd be an evil preacher. Are you serious?

I'm a preacher? Mmm. And here's our little Catholic girl. Are you, do you still go to church?

I do not still go to church, but I did go to Catholic college. So all the way up... Went to Catholic college? I did.

Can you say which one? While she's masturbating the lady with the pink... You know what? I hustler kind of blew my cover, so I will say that I'm a graduate of Loyola Marymount,

a fine Jesuit institution. Oh, Nick, write this down. Loyola Marymount. Loyola Marymount University.

And with a magna cum laude? I was summa cum laude. I graduated at the top of my class. Mmm, very good.

Yeah, and what was your major? She likes to be on top. I was in English literature and journalism. Well, you're topping this lady right now.

And now, did you know you would become a porn star? I had always been an exhibitionist, and I started out doing art modeling when I moved to L.A. on a scholarship for college, and it wasn't until my junior year that I felt comfortable actually charging people and doing it as more of a job.

But ever since then, I've done it regularly, and I don't plan on stopping anytime soon. And we are so glad you are going to keep doing it, Odette. Yes, me too. And, you know, more and more different kinds of people are getting into sexual performance.

It's amazing. And I think it's great. I mean, you're very creative. And are you keeping up on your writing?

Are you writing about your experiences, my dear? I am, yes. Good girl. You know.

So that's cool. English Lit Loyola Marymount. Did you get that? Right.

So thank you, Loyola Marymount. Thank you. And you also went to Loyola. My family, yeah.

All right. Oh, great. Yeah. Wow.

We've got like a reunion going here. Right? Yeah. You got what?

Nice. I'm still waiting for my jello shot. You're waiting for what? Your jello shot.

Oh, come right up here. Here she comes. Brothers and sisters. Put your hands together for sister Ava.

Yeah. Who do you want it off of? You know the jello shot too. Uh-oh.

Okay. All right. Okay. Off she goes with her top brothers and sisters.

Beautiful. Ava of her pierce nipples. I've been waiting to see those nipples. Here we go.

All right. How are you doing, Ava? Did you miss us this week? Yes, of course.

I always love playing here. Aw, we missed you too. That's why you're back. We really had a good time.

I missed you too. Okay. So look at this. This is a pretty little thing here.

She's like a little fairy. Like a little forest fairy. But she's very, very capable. Do your boobies have magical powers?

By the way, we have holy water loo in case anyone needs some. Not too much. And there she goes. Lean back.

And then expose those lovely pierce nipples. Oh, so hot. There are. There's all types here tonight.

But you know what? I think we have all natural boobs tonight on the girls. Right? Let's hear it.

Yeah! And natural vaginas too. I'm not sure about the boobs on my friend here. Me?

Yeah. I'm good. Are they real? No.

What's the best doctor in Beverly Hills? You can buy crazy shit out here. There she goes. And now suck it right down.

She swallows like a bitch. She does. What should we do? Odette de la Croix.

Yes, she's so lovely. And Brad, you can masturbate to her. Brad has been tweeting about masturbating to you all week, so I just want to give a shout out to him,

even though somehow we can hear one song. I left the stage to masturbate for a little while. You inspired me so much. Oh, wow.

What'd you do? Where'd you go? I've been practicing masturbation. Can you show us?

You know that you've been practicing? I'm satisfied. I just came to get a shot. I just came to get a shot.

Oh, you need to get a shot. Okay, here we go. And did you choose your flavor? So Brad, his name is Avid Masturbator on Twitter.

Oh, yes. You have a message for him, don't you? I recognize Avid Masturbator, and I just want to say good for you

for being so open about your masturbating. And I see your tweets. I definitely read them. Oh, you read my tweets?

Uh-oh. I will now. We're all Avid Masturbators. There's many Avid Masturbators,

but there's only one on Twitter. And his name is Brad. Thank you, Brad. And he's in love with Odette.

And he's going to masturbate two images of her tonight. And he can masturbate to what's going to happen right now. Yes, and what is going to happen right now? I'm going to be the human table once more tonight.

What is the human table? Yes, the communion table. This is communion. Did you take communion when you were a little...

Oh, I did. What is the human table? Feel about that. What's the human table?

Guilty, a little. Catholic guilt. Because you felt like if you weren't pure, you couldn't take the communion.

Exactly. And no one is ever pure enough. And yet, here in Bonoboville, we are all pure enough to take communion.

Oh, yes. Yes. As long as we are peace through pleasure, Bonobos, we are pure and we are loving.

And we are here to take communion off of the lovely delectable titties of sister Odette Delacroix. Hey, man. Hey, women.

Let's do this. And here she is. I just need to prepare the surface. Yes, prepare the surface.

Tongue, tongue, tongue. She gives good tongue. She gives great tongue. There she goes.

Oh, she's doing both. She's a greedy little mistress. That's fine. Well, that's why there's two.

Oh, yeah. That's true. I was wondering, why are there two? Yeah.

And there is the shot. Is it, okay. Finger it. I guess this is the method you have to use.

You've got to finger that shot. Swallow the... No, don't finger the shot. Finger the girl.

Bonoboville jello shot. Uh-oh. Finger her. Finger the girl.

Is that a t-shirt? It's a fingering thing. Okay, here she goes. Finger food.

And she is licking up. Yes. You know? She only had part of the salt.

You have to finish the salt, right? Unless I go home with salty tits. You've got salty tits. No, she's doing it now.

Oh, no, there's no salt left now. Okay, she's licking up the salt. All right, here we go. Okay.

She's very thorough. So, let's hear it for our mistress, Ava. Ava. Odette, the lapsed Catholic.

Table of Christ. Yes. Very good. Okay, well, I think we're about out of time,

so we're going to say quick good-byes to everybody before we go into the after-party. Aw, well, you know, the show part is almost over, but the party is about to begin, okay?

Oh, yes. I agree on that. So, first of all, here we are. Odette de la Croix, brothers and sisters.

Yes. You had such a good time. You know, she's just amazing. I will be back.

I'm sure. And where do we find you? You can find me at Odette de la Croix on Twitter, O-D-E-T-T-E-D-E-L-A-C-R-O-I-X

and at sexycustomvideos.com. Yo. Woo. And let's see, we have Mistress Ava.

You can find me at Worship underscore Eva on Twitter or Ms. Eva, M-S Eva, triple X, sorry. Those shots are getting to me. Hey, you know, I've been calling you Ava all night.

I'm surprised you didn't try to spank me for that, but maybe later. You can call me whatever you want. You can call me whatever you want.

Woo. I'll call you sweetheart. Aw. So, now.

I had a great time. We love you, Ava. As always. Yeah.

Give a shout out. Shout it all out, baby. I want to give a shout out to my hometown of Bellevue, Washington and my mom who's listening right now.

I love you mom so much. Hey, mom. Hey, is your mom really listening? Yeah, she's really listening right now.

Hey, you know, mom of Penny Jean. What is her name? Esther. Esther?

That sounds like a Jewish girl. Well, she, I don't know. Woo. She raised Jewish and then she became Wiccan

or something like that? I don't know. We're not Wiccan. We're just gritty.

Okay, okay, okay. Well, anyway, Esther is the name of one of my favorite heroines of the Old Testament, the Bible, because she is the beauty contest winner

who saved her people by seducing the king and basically being an exhibitionist, whereas Queen Vashti played in our pormsfield by Amor Hilton refused to strip naked for the king.

So Esther did and then she basically won the war. Okay, so, and a shout out to your tire. We appreciate you bringing up your daughter to be so beautiful and smart and giving.

I love you, mom, more than anything. And I want to give a shout out to the entire state of Georgia and Ocala, Florida, and Hunter Turner, and Connor Cox. And I can't think of there's so many more people.

I love all of you. The reason I'm here today. And my Twitter is at Penny Jean, Penny Exotic Jean. Please follow me because it measures my worth.

And I only have 900 and some followers, so my worth is low. So please upgrade it. You're worth is high, baby.

You're worth is high. Okay, so now where are we going? Oh, Juicy Jay. Where do we find you?

You can find me anywhere online. Just look up DJ Juicy Jay. Wow, we've been seeing you since like 2006. Yeah, you know, I'm a fun guy, I guess, to get around.

You're a fun guy. So yeah, get Snoop Dogg and whoever you all with. Come on over here. Actually, you know, it's whoever's around this week.

Whoever's around this week. We're going on tour soon. So we'll be around all around the country, saying hi to new people

and turning new people on all over the world. All right. Woo. And senior Fisher, Mr. Hart.

I'm a whole pack of trouble and I'm all over the goddamn place. You can catch me on Saturday nights at www.jackaloperadio.com for heart attack.

That's right, heart attack, where I go fucking ape shit, crazy on the man trying to pull his bullshit. And otherwise, you watch American Horror

as the world's greatest uncut horror channel, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, for free at www.filmon.com. That's www.filmon.com.

I am Hart D. Fisher and I will eat your fucking children. Do people masturbate to that? Oh, they do. Come on.

You've been in this business a long time. That is scary. Dan Ziggs, my buddy. Come on.

Seriously. They turn up his voice and jump on the speaker. I ain't nothing but trouble. Wow.

Okay. So, where do we find you? Rusty Fox at Twitter and Rusty Fox at American Horror.

Rusty what? Stay close to the microphone. Rusty Fox at Twitter and Rusty Fox at American Horror.

Yeah, yeah. We've been smoking Rusty out so he kind of doesn't know where he is right now.

Brother Hart knows how to talk on a microphone. I'm going to walk him home. We got to give people like Mike lessons before the show here.

You did it right. All right, brothers and sisters. And of course our friend Jack is out there somewhere.

But we want to thank you all for joining us. We want you to have a Mary, Mary masturbation month.

It is the Mary masturbation month of May, brothers and sisters, and you might masturbate all year. But this is the month that you honor it.

This is the month that you kind of focus on it. That you maybe try something different, like edge play or like a Sybian. You know, come over to the speakeasy.

Try it. And it's a time for you to explore with your partner, mutual masturbation. It's a time to try something different.

Maybe talking about masturbation with your girlfriends. I mean, that's a possibility. Exactly.

I'm going to try edging this month. You're going to try edging. For masturbation month, I'm going to try the edging this month.

Definitely. Even for women. Come on. When you come within two minutes,

it's never going to be as powerful and orgasm as if you edge it for, you know, 15 minutes, a half hour, something like that.

For a half hour. For a half hour, yeah. Yeah, sure. A half hour of sex.

Well, I'll try it. Or masturbation. Or it feels like a half hour. You know.

Anyway. That's the point. Who else did I want to say goodbye to? G.C.J., of course.

I want to thank you for having me on the show. I had a great time. Thank you so much. You did.

It was fantastic. I talked to you with a jettle shot in my mouth. So thank you. You know what?

The fact that they make a movie that has the cutting off of a breast, PG, where the kissing of a breast

and the bearing of a breast is rated X is kind of ridiculous. It's totally ridiculous. Yeah.

Right. These beautiful breasts. Oh, I think. An all direction.

So brothers and sisters, by the way, you know, if you're big fans of the show, I just want to let you know we are looking for

a million dollars. Okay. Can I have some too? So if you've got a million dollars,

let us know. Yeah, because I need some too. I need a 50 pound box. We actually have a few possibilities

of a million dollars that we're getting from some possible investors out there. But just in case you want to contribute to the next stage of the Speakeasy,

the institute, then PonyUp. Actually, we're looking at investments of 20,000 dollars or more. And it's a beautiful place down here, by the way.

It's a beautiful place. Yeah, you could just make it out to Juicy Jay. Yeah. Now, but here we're investing in a building

because we're going to expand Bonoboville, brothers and sisters. We're going to move into a new building. It's a fabulous place,

but we'll talk about it in the party. For now, make like Bonobos, not baboons. By the way, Bonobos masturbate and they sometimes use sex toys.

You can see them in the San Diego Zoo and they'll like rub a plastic ball against the big juicy clit of Bonobo. Definitely.

This is something to look at. Yeah, Bonobos are into all kinds of sex and they're very, very peaceful. They have never been seen killing each other

in the wild or captivity. And the females have a lot of sex together. They rub pussies together a lot. Only sometimes.

A lot of female power and very little violence. No killing and lots of sex. Why do the males put up with the females having all that power?

Because they get laid a lot. Because the pussies that God damn good. So practice your masturbation. Celebrate masturbation month.

Make like Bonobos, not baboons. Make love, not war. Make love to someone you love tonight. Even if that someone is you.

I love you. We all love you. Hallelujah. See the clap sign.

See the clap sign. Need to talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else? You can talk to us.

I'm Dr. Susan Block, your mistress of the airwaves. But my day job is director of the Dr. Susan Block Institute

for the erotic arts and sciences. Specializing in sex therapy over the phone. Anytime you need to talk, whether you need serious psychotherapy

or a hot phone sex experience or a combination, my world renowned telephone sex therapists are just a phone call away.

Totally private, absolutely confidential. We listen, talk with you, advise you, we'll play for you, fantasize with you. No fantasy is too taboo

and help you with anything from impotence to exhibitionism, fears to desires, fetishes to marriages. For more information, call us at

213-291-9497. That's 213-291-9497 anytime you need to talk.