Dr. Suzy’s B-Day Bacchanal

Full transcript of Dr. Suzy’s B-Day Bacchanal on The Dr. Susan Block Show:

You're listening to Radio Suzy One on the World Wide Web and now here she is, Dr. Susan Block. Brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners, artists and exhibitionists, lawyers, connoisseurs, professors and porn stars, wankers and spankers, congressional wieners and Schwarzenegger schlongs.

All you children is sex and we are all children of sex. We may be God's children. We may be the children of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. We may be the children of Adonai Eloheinu Adonaiachad. We may be the children of some hot wick and goddess.

Venus, born from the sea. Yes, of Zeus' ejaculate, Venus' birthday. Yes, we may be children of Venus. We may be children of Buddha.

We may be children. We may be your children, all of us. I don't know, but I do know, I do know that we are all children of sex. Can I hear an amen? Can I hear an amen? And I welcome you to my birthday.

I'm a child of sex. Yes, Venus, you who are even the goddess of sex and yet not actually born of sex. Strange how so many of our gods and goddesses are not really born of sex. But all of us are.

We are. With all due respect to the Virgin Mary, most mothers are not virgins. And neither are the fathers, for that matter. Not yet. We haven't started cloning ourselves or birthing ourselves from thighs and shafts of light, things like that.

Well, some of us are cesareans, but basically we come out of mama's pussy from papa's dick. We do. Well, sometimes it might be into a test tube, but still, there was a dick involved. I know there was, for my birth, and gosh, it's so silly. I don't know. On your birthday, people are always just congratulating you.

Like, for what? I mean, because you're alive, right? Which I guess at my age is quite an accomplishment. Ah, yes. It's my birthday. And yes, yes, aging is wonderful, much better than the alternative.

And there is that ripening theory, isn't there? Benjamin Franklin, one of my heroes in politics and in sex. An ethical hedonist, if ever there was one. Benjamin Franklin wrote to a young man requesting advice on how to conduct himself

and whom to go after in the world of romance, said older women are better because they appreciate it so much more. And we do. Either we do or we don't, and then we just go shopping. That's the end of it.

But, you know, if you're going to be into sex as you get older, you kind of have to make that decision. It's kind of made for you when you're young. But as you get older, you know, you have these choices.

Go after the chambermaid or tweet your picture to a college student. You know, you have many choices. And I choose sex. And spanking. Spanking, that's one great thing about birthdays.

There's a lot of great things about birthdays. But spankings, as Sister Sin well knows, is one of the greatest things about birthdays. I'm not sure where that custom comes from. Spanking the baby when the baby's born or just punishing the child for being

such a spoiled little prince or princess, which is what we're supposed to be on our birthday. So we have to get it, you know. Oh, and that's what this mitt is for. It's actually not for the spanking.

It's to make you feel better after the spanking. Unless you're a vegan. Because this was given to me, I was told by a clown, a porn clown, that it's okay because this was given to me as a gift.

But it is chinchilla. Very politically incorrect. And I apologize to the chinchillas. I mean, I don't know.

It's kind of funny. But if this was a bonobo, it would be terrible. But it isn't. I don't know how endangered the chinchillas are.

But it feels just fantastic, you know. And so if you get your spanking for my birthday, then you get to feel this fabulous mitt against your hot ass. Yes.

Oh, it feels so good. Ah, yes. My birthday. I am so grateful.

I am. I am so grateful that you're all here. And you all look so beautiful. And you, my darling listeners, and my lovers, everyone, my viewers,

and my friends, and my guests, and my colleagues, and my fellow ethical hedonists, and my speakeasy community, my ever-changing speakeasy community,

and my always eternal bonobo gang. Thank you. Thank you. And thank you, my prince.

Thank you for being here today. I love you. Okay. So your microphone, I don't know if it's on, but yeah.

Anyway. It's on. Ah, you're just very, very quiet. I want you to shout your love.

I love you, darling girl. Isn't that what you do on birthdays? You're my little bambolina. I don't know what to do on birthdays.

Let's find out. Let's start talking to our guests. Okay. Why don't we?

All righty then. Dr. Chantel. Dr. Sufi. Welcome back.

Thank you. Happy birthday. Oh, thank you. How do you feel about birthdays?

You know, I... You have to move closer to your mic, darling. I love birthdays, to be told. Yes, because you know what?

My birthday is the day before my dad's birthday. Oh. So it's always a really special... Do you have like an erotic thing for your dad, Dr. Chantel?

Come on, come on. Did your daddy spank you on your birthday? He might have. Yes, I bet he did.

And you know, I mean, it's okay. I mean, Freud would say it's okay. Freud would say that's exactly the most perfect thing ever. Yes, absolutely.

Absolutely. So did you get spanked on your birthday? Do you like spankings? You know, I think it would depend on who's giving them and why.

If the spanking was sort of like a punitive childhood spanking, I probably didn't like it. But the spanking I got last week, pretty good. Last week you got one.

For what? I don't know. Just for fun. Oh, this was like a personal spanking?

This was a personal spanking. Oh, nice, nice. We're going to have to hear more about that. Maybe, maybe.

In fact, I need to know now. Was it pants down or skirt up? Skirt up. Wow.

What kind of panties are you wearing now? I will not tell. I would not tell before and I will not tell now. We're going to move along.

Destin. Destin is new to the speakeasy. This is Destin Garrick. Hello there, Dr. Suzy.

Well, happy birthday. I feel like telling everybody else happy birthday, yeah. Happy birthday. Seemingly, I have a little gift for you.

Seemingly. Yeah. So I was told. So you were told.

You don't know exactly. No, no, no. Now I know. Now I know.

And I'm ready anytime. Now you know. This was something that you didn't know. Wow.

Well, do you want to give it to me now? I can give it to you right now. Really? I mean, oops.

Don't put my photographer. I really don't need to be asked twice. Really. What I do need though is for the DJ to throw some music on that has a good heavy bass beat preferably.

Music. Oh, I think I'm getting a dance of some sort. Wow. Okay.

Right over here. Yikes. Yes. Destin Garrick.

And you are some kind of an erotic philosopher or tantric. You could call me an erotic philosopher. You could also call me the erotic rock star. Erotic rock star.

Right. Erotic rock star. Okay. Whoa.

And this. You're going to have me on. I'm going to make it work. Oh, I see.

Yes. Definitely. Wow. There we go.

Here's something. Some music. Whoa. Okay.

Now it's getting faster. Everything's moving faster. I'm not sure where to put my legs. I'm not sure how to receive.

Whoa. Yeah. Well, you know. I mean, I'm trying.

Okay. Yeah, especially when it goes wopting in my face. See, you've got to be careful when you're receiving. You do.

You have to know how to receive. Especially from someone you've never met who's right away on your birthday. You're really coming on. I did ask for it.

It's true. I said I'd like to see my birthday present. You have to be careful on your birthday. It's kind of like carnival.

It's dangerous. Hi, Michael. Hi, Graham. Hi, Sam.

Hi, Sam. Whoa. Just introducing my other guests. Yo.

It's a good thing I shaved. I guess I am getting my birthday spanking. I don't think we should do it so hard right away. The night is young, darling.

All right. Okay. It does feel good that mink chinchilla. Whoa.

I did the wrong move. What did I do? Oh, why now? Hey.

Oh, Destin. What a way to start my birthday. Thank you so much. Nice to meet you, darling.

Whoa. Destin, you're dangerous. Well, welcome, Destin. Hi, Dr. C.

Hi, Dr. S. Well, and so are you going to dance for me now, Michael? Oh. My birthday present to you is not dancing for you.

I think that's where it's... By the way, can we guess what color her panties are? Can we guess? Yeah, I will not.

She has a job, a day job. Does she not wear panties to her day job? I might not. Perhaps they are the invisible panties.

I have a poem for you at some point. So whenever you want to... This is a good time, man. Do you want the birthday poem?

Sure. I mean, how long is it? Short. Okay.

It's not a theater play. Nor is it an epic. Brothers and sisters. I love it already.

Saints and sinners. Dr. Susie opens her arms to losers and winners. From far and from wide they come to be on the show. Some to read poems, some to squirt, and some to grow.

Whatever the reasons are, the stranger's on arrival, but when they leave, they're friends without rival. So as we celebrate with Dr. Susie and eat birthday cake, remember this, what counts isn't the family you're given,

but the family you make. Aww. Happy birthday, Dr. Susie. Can I get an amen?

Amen. Can I get an amen? Amen! Wow, that was really cool.

Happy birthday. Aww. That was great, thank you. No problem.

And by the way, we don't... Our birthdays is the only day you don't get spanked in England, because we're very privileged. Oh, right, of course.

Because you spank all the time. Yeah, it's in the houses of parliament. The Queen's a big spanker. Yes.

Yeah, she's always spanking people. When were you first spanked? My God, I can't even remember. I think my mom was a spanker.

She was a spanker. She was a hitter. Yeah. She went immediately from hello to spank.

You know, it was like nothing in between. Really? Were other kids not just her own? Oh, everybody.

And I would always say to why are you spanking me. She goes, I don't know, but there's probably a reason. And to be honest, there was. I was a rotten child.

Well, of course there's a reason, and there's a reason that we invaded Iraq as well. To spank people. Yes, exactly.

I mean, there's a reason. My mom was not behind that despite the rumors. No, no. By the way, she's never had sex.

I just want to say that. Right. Right. The Virgin Mom.

My mom's a virgin. The Virgin Mom. Of course. No, she's written a tell-all book,

which I'd now found out that all my uncles are actually not uncles, they're people she's fucked. Maybe that's where this idea of all these virgin births come from is people's own, like, God-like sense of themselves

and then not wanting to think of their parents as ever having had sex. Well, to the age of 16, I actually thought immaculate conception just meant it was very clean. Yes.

I didn't realize. Yes, very clean. But what is clean? No sex.

That's clean as a gas, after all. Oh, Jesus. Jesus. All right.

I'm going quickly around the room, and you're going to have to have a porn star on your lap, you know. Okay.

But here's Graham. Graham Panante. Hold on. Wait, wait, it's not good to see me yet.

It's going to be great to see me in a second here, because you're going to be so frustrated from not being able to speak. And no, you know, happy isn't enough.

I'm sorry. You have to be ecstatic. Oh, yeah. Here we go.

See, that feels so good. My delight is slowly building intergidity to see you. Happy birthday.

Oh, thank you. Feliz cumpleaños. Yes, and all that. Mm-hmm.

Ole. Yeah. I took off my lower skirt for you. Did you notice that?

I don't know. I'm not wearing pants. Right, you're not? No.

Let me see. Stand up. My legs are painted this way, but... You're not wearing pants.

You know, people try to fool you on your birthday. They do. Now, Destin here really wasn't wearing pants. We only thought he was.

I know. Do yours pull away like that? I just need a little bit more of a wingspan. Right.

Maybe I get a couple of drinks in me. Okay. We're going to do that, actually. Actually, we can just get started with that

because it is my birthday. So we're going to get started with that. So where's my lovely assistant? That would be Ms. Sasha, sweet.

Sister Sasha, come on up here on the stage. Everybody, please give my lovely assistant a hand. So look at this little black dress. So beautiful.

Knock off my hat. Everybody's into knocking me tonight. You know, that's what you do. You want to get the other microphone, Susan?

Yes. Other microphone, please. Here you go. Here you go.

All right. Well, that happened relatively smoothly. Yes. Yes.

So how are you doing tonight? I'm fabulous. I'm so happy to be here. Happy birthday.

Happy Susan's birthday. Happy Susan's birthday. Okay. So you like birthdays?

I love birthdays. You love them. Well, you're only 21. Yeah.

So they're still exciting. Yes. Right. You haven't had very many.

No. Right. You just had the 21st. That's exciting.

Last September, yeah. Did you get spanked? No, I didn't. No?

Well, you need to. I need to. Definitely. I need to catch up.

You definitely need to. Maybe we should get that out of the way. I think I need 21 spanks. I think so.

Right? 21 spanks. I'm going to introduce Sin because she's on a microphone. Hi, Sin.

Oh, hello. Sin Sage. Your microphone is working right away. It's working.

Right. And Lily Cade is standing over to the side just sultry-like. Looking so sultry-like with her bra half off. Half bra.

Oh, yeah. Very nice. Very spankable bottom there. Spankable.

Yes. I know all about it. All right. So this is my starting lineup, I guess.

But I have a lot more guests, so we're going to have to get you guys drunk. No panties. No panties. I think that Panty Boy would agree with me that you need to be spanked for that.

I do. Right. I mean, birthdays aside, that is a problem. So we're going to have to give you the 21 spanks.

All right. And then the chinchilla. Yes. Okay, so over the knee.

Oh, yes. Over the knee. Yes. Okay, I think the top has to just come down a little with the nipples down.

Yeah, there you go. Look at those beautiful. Holy crap. Bubbles.

Yes. So nice. Okay, and you have to fold the microphone like this. I got to comb my hair back.

Okay, one of you. Okay, there we go. There we go. Whoa.

Oh, yes. Yes. Slip away. Slip away.

Okay. Nice shoes. Alligator. I love that.

Talk about endangered species. Look at this. What a beautiful bottom you have. Okay.

Thank you. Well. So who's going to count for me? How about everybody?

Okay. Okay. It's my birthday. And are you a bad, bad girl?

I'm a very, very bad girl. Tell us how. I'm disgustingly bad. Oh, that takes a four.

What's the last bad thing you did? Well, I got fucked in the ass for breakfast yesterday. That sounds good and bad. Six, seven, eight.

And these scarters are deliciously bad. I just have to linger on them for a moment. Because it's my birthday. It's like a present.

Eight, nine. Oh, you're being so nice, Dr. Susie. I know, because you're going to get her in ravish or later. Or ravage, I should say.

Ravage. Ravage. This is just four-place banking here. Eleven.

Twelve. One. But it feels so nice. Oh, I lost count.

I need some louder calls here. Or else you're going to have to give up your microphones. We're off. Okay.

Fourteen. Can you count? Because I can't. I've lost count and I haven't even started drinking.

Fourteen, right? Yes. Okay. Fifteen.

There we go. Yes. Sixteen. Seventeen.

Eighteen. Nineteen. Twenty. Twenty-one.

One to grow on. One to grow on. Okay. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Oh, that feels lovely. Chinchilla. Mmm. Mmm.

Okay, good girl. Thank you. All right. That was nice.

My hand is here to prove it. Yeah. So now, you know, we need to get the drinks. This is Agua Cocoa Leaf Lecure.

You have to lick the salt off of the body part of another person. Yes. Oh, and we have phone calls too. Who should we speak to first?

The choice. While the girls are making out and not pouring the Agua, I might add. The choice. The choice.

Okay. Let's see. Let's put on Lord Fowl because he's calling from farther away and he could be called away. To active duty at any moment.

MTA, as I know, you're just hanging out at home. What line is young? But I love you too. Don't worry.

I do. Oh, he's online too. Lord. Hello.

Hello. Is this Lord Fowl? Hello. Hello, hello, hello.

Can you hear me? Yes. Is this Lord Fowl? This is he.

Oh, hello Lord Artemis Fowl. How have you been, my good doctor? Well, I'm very well. I'm here celebrating my birthday and I've got two beautiful topless ladies sitting by me.

Mmm, nice. Well, I wanted to call and wish you a very happy birthday. I know it's been a while since we've been in touch. Yes, it has.

And you should be here to take some spankings for me because everyone who's here is taking spankings very nicely for me. Oh, I would love that. Although you will be happy to know that I did celebrate my birthday but also a friend of mine. How did a nudist colony today?

A nudist colony. Very, very good. Well, that's something to celebrate. I often celebrate my birthday at a nudist colony.

But I didn't this year because there wasn't enough time. So I just went to a Shiatsu massage place, which is pretty damn painful. But really felt good afterwards. Really great.

Orgasmic. The happy ending was when we came back. Mmm, yes. Yes.

Absolutely. Because there were two North Koreans giving us a massage. Mmm. It was very serious.

I just had to spank that because it's my birthday. It's my birthday. Okay, very nice panties. Oh, you should put on a pair of panties, Sasha.

Yeah, find some panties to put on so Panty Boy can have them later. Panty Boy. Good pair. I've got a huge selection of birthday panties here for all the girls and boys.

If boys want to put on panties, you may also do that. Okay. Well, thank you, Lord Artemis. I do have to move around, but I hope to see you soon and give you that birthday spanking.

Absolutely. All right. So you take care. Oh, yes.

So she's selected a very tasteful little, what are these? Sort of a ivory kind of ivory. A contrast. Very nice.

Very nice. You just have so much appreciation for older things for such a young girl. You know, the old style stockings. Right.

It's funny. I hope she has an appreciation for older things. What, sweetie? Oh, MTAZ.

Yes. Hello, darling. Wait, wait, wait, wait. You're just getting a lot of interference.

Oh, I am. Yeah. Okay. Well, I'll get up.

I'll get up. And I want to encourage my beautiful ladies to help me to discourse the Agua here to our guests. And you've got MTAZ online. MTAZ, hello.

Hello, MTAZ. Hello. Happy birthday, Susan. I didn't want to forget today to call you, you know.

Well, thank you so much for not forgetting. I didn't realize. I'm glad the Alzheimer's hasn't set in completely. And I just realized that Michael Phyllis' mother was buried in Phyllis and that Michael was...

That's true. Michael is related to Jesus Christ. Well, I don't know. They were both virgin births, I guess.

I know. That's what I found out. Dionysus also, you know. And both of our mothers thought we were gods, so, you know, yeah.

Right. Is his microphone on? Oh, who's in my... We need you, yes.

Well, Michael Phillips was responding. Oh, okay. That his mother and Jesus' mother, they both thought that their sons were gods. And my mother thought the same thing.

And it sounds like sin's mother thought the same thing. Were you spanked, sin, as a child? Sin? Hold on.

I can't have too many microphones. Oh, right. Okay, so turn this down. Mine, I was...

Yeah, I was spanked. Mm-hmm. Yes. I actually...

Both? Mommy. Mommy. Definitely.

She didn't make a habit out of it. It wasn't something that happened all the time, but it definitely happened. And I can remember having, like, naughty fantasies about my babysitters when I was very young. Very young.

Oh. About getting spankings. Really? Did they spank you too?

A couple times. Your babysitters. And they were always, always... My babysitters were always, like, really attractive teenage girls.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And did you get, like, aroused? Or are you only aroused in thinking back about it?

Oh, I think I was aroused at the time. Mm-hmm. I was having fantasies about being, like, punished and put in a closet, and then they'd come after me and...

Did you have birthday spankings? Oh, yes. I've had birthday spankings as long as I can remember. You're not owed any, maybe?

Oh, you know, I'm always owed a spanking. Yes, you are. There's some reason. Empty odds.

Were you spanked as a child? Yeah, when I went to a Catholic convent, remember, the priests would beat the living hell out of me. I was a real Catholic.

I'm sorry to laugh at your pain, but the way you describe it is so amusing. Yes, and did you get a birthday spanking ever, or not really? No, no, no. No birthday spanking.

I'll tell you a very funny anecdote. I was in class six or grade six in America. And we were all looking at a Playboy magazine in the back of the class. Yes.

And I found one in Hong Kong somewhere and bought it back with me. And he caught us, chewed us, and brother General spanked the daylights out of me. So that's the last I remember. I was sitting about eight, twelve years old at the time.

Really? Yeah. Uh-huh. Well, it sounds like you need a spanking to remember more.

I want Amanda Blow to spank me, by the way. Oh, right. Is she here? I don't know if she's here.

She's supposed to be here. But there's lots of other beautiful women here. So they can all spank you next time you get here. Anyway, I just wanted to wish you a very wonderful birthday, Susan.

Well, thank you. And Sherry did call me from Abu Dhabi and asked me to say the same on her behalf also. Well, all right. Well, I accept Abu Dhabi's birthday greetings.

I accept the greetings from the Arab Spring. I accept the revolution. Yeah. And the revolution.

I have a wonderful time tonight. Yes. I'll hopefully come by in a couple of weeks and I'm feeling better and see you in Mac. Good.

Good. The revolution. Yes. All over Egypt and the Arab world.

It's all because of sex, right? I'm sure it is. It sure is hella about democracy. I can tell you that.

All right. Power to the people. Absolutely. Thank you, MTAZ.

Okay. Very welcome. So back to my guests. MTAZ is like, you know, he's a wonderful man and he's been here many times.

Sometimes I think he's a secret agent from Pakistan. Oh, yeah. But he's an interesting character. You never know with MTAZ.

You don't know what's going on. He has so much information and he knows so many people. Right. Including a lot of porn stars.

A lot of porn stars. The minister of culture of Pakistan. That he does not appear to have sex with. All right.

We're starting the Agra ritual now. So this is where you have to have the salt off of someone. Now, Dr. Chantel is very careful about herself. But what do you think, Dr. Chantel, you're a sexual sociologist, aren't you?

Sort of. Sort of. Is that a good, I mean... Just a sociologist.

You're a sociologist. But you study a certain sexual community, which would be the porn community. Yes. Right.

And you know, I don't know if this is, it's related to porn, sort of. For sure. I mean, you know, you're not a porn star, but you're here. Right.

You know, but I mean, there's a lot of porn stars here. People into porn. But I mean, what do you make of the Agra salt ritual? It's an interesting ritual.

Like all ritual behavior, it has a place in a ceremony. It certainly does. And we are right now practicing, participating in a birthday ceremony. Spanking, cake, festivity.

Did you pour a drink for our young lady here? You didn't want one. Okay. Oh, so I'm not...

You're also careful with yourself. I think I have to find out what... I prefer other brands of drinking. Oh!

What are you afraid is going to happen if you drink here? Oh, I love drinking, but... Well, people are very afraid of all kinds of things, right? Yeah.

What are we afraid of? I'm afraid of sharks, personally. Sharks? Yeah.

Does that have something to do with being here? No. I was just thinking of what I was afraid of. It was a joke, but, you know...

You could take it seriously, actually. All right. Well, so, I don't know. I mean, you could have an awfully big shot there.

Two. You have two. I didn't realize we hadn't started yet. I think Rubber Neckrow is going to have some...

I know you like Agwa, right? Okay. So, you want some... Come up here on the stage.

Say hello. Yeah. Yeah, right? Do you know Rubber Neckrow?

I met her earlier. Okay. You have to take the microphone. You have to remember, as my lovely assistant...

The microphone. That you... That people who speak must be speaking into him. It's very important.

I met her just earlier at the bar. Okay. Well, this is Rubber Neckrow, who hasn't been here for a while, but we've known Rubber Neckrow for quite a while.

We actually met Rubber Neckrow through Master D, who's back there. Hi, Master D, who brought me a beautiful photograph. Show the photograph. He brought me this photograph by Eric Kroll.

Look at this incredible thing. Let me just hold this up here. This is a photograph by Eric Kroll. It's an original photograph.

An original photograph that is of Dom's of San Francisco. Whoa. I have to look dignified here, and I'm not. I'm totally not looking dignified.

But this is Dom's of the 1950s. They haven't changed much. No. I mean, he told me...

I mean, when he's saying... This is by Eric Kroll, or he said this is from Eric Kroll. So I thought it was by him. It's not...

Right. He brought it from him, or, you know. But Eric had it in his collection. But I thought he meant by him, and that it was just some Dom's

up in San Francisco looking, you know, 1950s-ish. But it's really 1950s looking 21st-century-ish. You know? That's a really beautiful print, actually.

Aging is strange. I mean, is this old or new? Don't talk to me about aging. I don't know.

Well, I mean, that's sort of one of the subjects. Whoa. Of tonight. So...

You want to give me that? Yeah. I'll take care of that. Okay.

Take care of that. Okay. Beautiful. Beautiful.

Thank you, Master D. So through Master D, I met the lovely Rubber Necro. And... Oh, thank you.

Say it into the microphone. It looks... Happy birthday. Yeah, that's right.

And this... Sasha can hold the microphone for you, so you can hold your drinks. And now, you know how the Agua ritual is done, right?

And then you get a Chinese aphrodisiac as well. Awesome. Right? Chinese aphrodisiac to match your dress.

Yummy. Look at this. I call Rubber Necro our lady of latex, which is close to the Virgin Mary, but not at all. Far from it.

Far from it. Or her. Okay. So now, you have a lot of things.

So let's put this thing down here. And actually, I can hold this for you for a moment, as well as this. Okay. So now, where do you want to...

And there goes the salt. Okay. The ritual is that you put the salt on the body part or parts. Yeah, you can do both of them.

Go right ahead. Let's do both. There we go. Just...

This is salty mountain here. Salty breasts. Yeah. Salty breasts.

It's like some kind of Chinese dish. Okay. And I'll hold the microphone now. So the breasts are not obscured.

All right. So this is a lot of salt for you, Rubber Necro, but you can do it. She's licking up that salt. All right.

Mmm. And she's got her little tongue ring going there just to make it a little kinky. She's so soft. Yes, yes.

There's some slurping sounds. Mmm. That's a little slur. Yeah.

All right. And down the hatch. Let's hear it for Rubber Necro. And you look great.

Thank you. Yeah. I mean, only you could make that dress match that hair, but it does. It's beautiful.

Great. Awesome. It looks lovely. Thank you.

So do you like spankings, I guess? Of course. You're a... I mean, you like all kinds of pain and submission.

And all that. Electricity. Electricity. Wow.

I don't have anything electrical. Master D. You wouldn't conduct it, would you? Wearing what you're wearing.

Not really. Oh, that's the problem. Or the good thing maybe that it doesn't conduct. I don't know if we'd want to conduct it.

Right? I mean, we don't want the whole place to blow up. My piercings. Oh, the piercings kind of conduct it.

Put it upside down. Here, have your Chinese aphrodisiac to give you strength. We're going to have an electrical spanking now. This is very exciting.

Master D. Master D has brought his box of goodies to administer pain. Dr. Suzy, you have some... Spankings.

I think you have some sperm on your hat. What is that? I have sperm? Yeah.

Oh, you mean just the hat? Yeah. Well, sperm, if sperm is green like this, then you should consult your urologist. Yes.

You know. Okay, we've got an electrical storm. We have an electrical storm. Okay, this is what is going on.

That's all right. At least we know what is going on here. If you're listening right now, it's time to sign up and watch. Because you can't hear shit.

Oh, it's my birthday. Can you pull your zipper down? Yeah. There, good.

Should I pull my zipper down? Yes, darling. It's my birthday. It's a beautiful day.

Destin pulled his pants off, at least part of them. You're responsible for taking off your rest. Dr. D and his diabolical birthday devices. I was just going to give you a simple spanking.

That's fucking true. Whoa, this is quite a trip to the dentist. And it's all for my birthday. This is becoming a tradition, actually.

You did this last birthday. Last year, she had her wisdom teeth taken out. Just like this. She's terrified.

Beautiful. Wow. That was lovely. That was very beautiful.

Scary. All right. Wow. Oh, you should leave your tits on.

Abu Ghraib. Abu Ghraib. No, it's non-consensual in Abu Ghraib. That's the big difference.

It doesn't hurt at all. Here we have real masochists. Are you a masochist, Graham, or a sadist? I think I'm more of the sadist.

Yeah. You like to give the spankings and the electrical jolts? Yeah, consensually. Consensually, of course.

Right, right. And you're going to sing for us tonight. Yes, Fogelfoot is singing a little bit later. Fogelfoot.

Is that a fetishistic name? Well, if you consider Gordon Lightfoot and Dan Fogelberg are objects of fetish. Ah.

Okay. Well, I guess that they are. I mean, there's a fetish for everything. And I think that there certainly is a fetish for that.

And, oh, we're having another dental extraction. This is called speaking in tongues. How does that feel on your tongue? Tickle.

Tickle. Just a little tickle. It's not what you call pain. Oh, look at that.

Yow. An electrical storm. Well, you know, you got to have some pyrotechnics for your birthday.

Some people just had birthday candles. I have Master D administering the wand of fire. What is this thing called? A power tool?

A violet wand. But it looks like it's almost like that fuck saw. But I don't know. All right.

Sasha Sweet is now getting the violet wand up and down her arm. Whoa. This is the American government trying to interfere

with our broadcast. Definitely. Wow. Let's hear it for Rubber Necro and Sasha Sweet

and Dr. D. Master D. The diabolical dentist. Wow.

And Titus. So here's your microphone now. Thank you. How did that feel?

It feels very invigorating. It's like little tiny bite marks going through your skin. That's the best analogy I can give it. I'm sorry that wasn't in your job description

when I asked you to be my assistant. I offered. I've done it before, but it's been a while. You like to experience things.

Exactly. Sexy. Don't put it on. Don't put it on.

You must be ready for someone else. Once an agua shot. Yes. Sin doesn't want an agua shot,

but Katie probably wants a shot. And she needs to celebrate my birthday because I think she dropped off this present. Oh, she wants to lick it over there.

All right. Well, that's convenient. Yeah, it's right there. Okay.

Well, you can just lick it right off of Miss Sin here. We need the salt. Salt. Here's salt.

Salt. Now we have also bananas. Yes, we have bananas. Right?

Would you like to suck on a banana with me? Love bananas. I eat them almost every day. Well, you know, they're so phallic, right?

I just want to put them in my mouth. Or put them in my pussy. Uh-huh. No, of course not.

No, no. Yeah. Oh, action in the front. Oh, here we go.

Down front. Look at this. Action. Yes.

That's Katie Kinz licking up her salt off of Sin Sage. And look at that nipple. That is just rising for the birthday.

Yeah. For you, baby. Well, thank you. I appreciate that.

All right. Beautiful. Oh, both for me. Yes.

I like that. Yeah, yeah. That's very good. Well, even though you're not drinking,

you should still take your spanking. I agree. Are you ready to receive it? So I am.

Okay. Because then Katie can sit in your chair. Oh, very practical. Let's go bonobos.

Oh, look at those panties. Whoa. Panty boy would be very impressed at these black slinky panties.

Slinky panties. Here. Hold my banana. Oh, I already had a bit of the tip.

I think the pants have to cut. Those are nice pants. That's hot. She is just.

Look at you. You're so hot. You look since ass. I want to put the microphone to the ass somehow

because it's talking to me. Yeah. That's hot. Okay.

What do I want to do? How about you hold the microphone and you get over my lap? I'm going to give you a spanking.

Yeah. Over the knee, I think. Right. This is old fashioned.

Well, I'm both handed. I can do either hand. Yeah. I'm ambidextrous that way.

Okay. Okay. Oh, no. I have a very strong lap

for an ass like this. Just lay yourself right across from me. And where's my mitt though? There it is.

Okay. Because I have to have that. But I'm probably not going to hit you hard enough to make you hurt.

No. Because you are such a tough sinner since age. Can I have a microphone over by her mouth?

Yeah. Hold on. Microphone, please. Right here.

Look at that awesome toy in your finger. Okay. So how many should we give you? How many?

How many? Well, as long as you can. Maybe a thousand, two thousand. Yeah.

Three thousand. Until I bleed. Look at this structure. Well, I think 21 is a good number.

That's what we gave Sasha. Some engineering here. Good. I was going to say she should get saved once

for every cock she's sucked in. How could she count? Every cock I've sucked. In the last month.

In the last month. In the last year. Last month. That would only be one.

That makes her have to think a lot. Okay, that doesn't work for us. Make up a number. Pussy I've eaten in the past month

because that's quite a few. I don't even know how many. Poet emeritus. How should we decide what to count?

27. That's exactly how old I am. Crazy. See?

That's why we call him the poet emeritus. He knew. He knew the correct number. Okay, so.

One. Two. Five. Five.

Six. Seven. Eight. Nine.

Ten. Ten. 13. 14.

15. 16. 17. 18.

18. 20. 21. 22.

23. 27. 27. 27.

27. 27. 27. 27.

27. 27. 28. 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 11!

Oh, did I say 10? Oh, you cheated! I cheated. How about you just play the game?

What a great ass! Oh, that's hot. Yeah, that's really my ass. I mean, I just want to say that Sin Sage is really like one of the great queens of spanking

and spanker-roma-ism. And she really is, and you have a lot of it on your website, don't you? It's all about it. It's all about it.

My website is a spanking website, yes. I thought it was about archaeology and philosophy. There's a little archaeology. Yeah, right, okay.

I thought so. It's not all about spanking, but it specializes in spanking. And what is your philosophy of spanking? My philosophy of spanking.

Do you think it's a punishment or a pleasure or a foreplay? I think it's all those things. I think it's kind of like wherever you want to take it in your mind. So sometimes it's fun to play like you're being punished for something bad

and have that in your mind and then just really over the knee, bad girl spanking and that can just get your juices flowing, dude. Oh, it gets... Yeah, yeah.

And sometimes it's just, it feels fucking good and you just, you rub your nails afterwards and then you rub it with the chinchilla. Oh, yeah.

I'm gonna be right back. I have to go to the bathroom. Chinchilla is nice, isn't it? Chinchilla feels friggin awesome.

It kind of, Max doesn't like how it looks. Would you say, honey, it looks like a rat? Looks like a rat. But isn't it great?

You rub it again. You have to talk on a microphone. Rub it more. Like rub it.

Hard. Wow. What a body. Whoa.

How about spanking with the chinchilla? That's almost like an oxymoron. Oh, yeah. Oh, it's got some this.

Ooh, yours is nice. Look at this butt. You have no idea. Me too.

You have the view of this butt. This is just an amazing butt. That's the Z-but. And I have read that booty is getting more and more important.

What do you think about that, Dr. Chantel? That people are talking about booty more and more. Booty and anal, both on men and on women. I don't know if they're talking.

Maybe it's just different people who are talking about it more. But people have always loved the ass. And they've always loved anal. It's just a matter of talking about it.

Maybe people are getting more friendly or more open toward the ass. That might be it. Anal friendly.

Anal friendly. Well, I think people are. Anal accepting. They've always been friendly towards the ass.

But now they're just willing to embrace it and own up to it. Considering the most governments are fucking us in the ass. We're feeling much better.

Right. We have to get used to it. Might as well relax and enjoy getting fucked. Our government, our lovers.

Anal buddies, maybe. What do you think, erotic rock star? Destin Garrett. What I'd like to see is more...

The thing that I love about anal sex, about introducing a woman to anal sex, who is that most of the women that I've been with haven't had very good anal sex experiences.

Why do you think that is? I think that most men learn how to fuck anal-y from porn. And that's not really the way to do it. No.

We have a lot of friends in porn. I know that. I know that. I gotta be careful with some of my wording.

I don't like all the things that porn teaches us. Well, you can't just jump right into anal sex, just stick it in her butt. You don't have to...

So what I love about it, though, what I really enjoy about anal sex with a woman is really teaching her how this can be an incredibly positive, pleasurable, amazing experience.

Agreed. And so especially if she's had negative experience before, because all that contraction is held in that body. And so through this, it just releases.

And the amount of pleasure that is available then... I would like to add something to that. Something static. Back in 1976, when the police decided to talk to the pornographers,

they asked the police, what can you do? And the police said, and this is the Porn Valley folks,

and I'm an old man and I was there, and they had a meeting with the police. They said, we don't want to get busted. We want to expand our business.

So they asked the police, what can we do? They said, you can put four fingers in a vagina, but you can't put five. Okay?

You can do many things, but most things you can't do. One of the things that you can do, one of the most dangerous things that you can do

is you can fuck somebody in the ass. And the police said, yes, as long as you're fucking them in the ass, it's okay, we won't bust you.

All right? Ass babies. And that is the most dangerous thing. So this is the Los Angeles Police Department.

This was Lieutenant Lloyd Martin, a vice squad back in the 1970s. And they said, anal sex? Good sex. You know what?

I know very few people that have anal sex. How many of you guys have anal sex? Raise your hand. Raise your hand.

You're asking a biased room. You're asking the wrong room here, yeah, for sure. Well, if you ask any of us if we can balance our checkbook, then you might get a little bit more diversity.

Well, nobody can balance their checkbooks today because it's all online. You know, if you can balance your checkbooks while having anal sex, that's really good.

That's amazing. That's like multi-task people. Multi-task. Right. Well, that's what they do in porn.

They're always multi-tasking, you know. Double penetration. And just anal is another door. It's like, you know, yeah.

Well, Max, you've heard about... Something different. You know, that's always the aphrodisiac. It's something different.

I've heard about what? If you do it in this, quote-unquote, regular places, then the other place is the ass. And of course, one of the new things

that is getting a lot of acceptance is guys getting it, you know, up the Hershey Highway. Well, hopefully without the Hershey. Anyway, what were you trying to say, darling?

Somebody was addressing me. I was going to mention they're actually re-going through that now in Los Angeles County. Really? I'm sure you guys have heard.

I don't know if you guys have heard, but the Cal OSHA is pretty much running porn out of the porn valley. They're trying. They're trying.

But let me just say this. They started many, many years ago. Listen, I'm the most prosecuted publisher in this fucking country.

23 times I spent three years in prison. Okay? Because I showed stump fucking. Who's out there? Bring them in here. They're making such a lot of racket.

Who's out there? I don't know, but while you're talking, I'm going to go check. Go check. So the fact is, the fact is that, you know,

Charlie Sheen says we're winning. So you can cut off our heads up here and then somebody else will come in. Right.

Because we are the revolution and the spring, the Arab spring is not about politics or democracy. All of that is nonsense.

That's all bullshit, okay? What it's about is that we've opened the curtains to sex and we've opened them up around the world with a technology, a military technology

called the Internet. Yup, absolutely. And with that Internet, we have sprung... Oh, my God.

All right. Back to the first thing. Back to the first thing. This is people. He's great though.

This is Prince Maximilian Rudolph Lubkovitsky-Lubkovitsky-Fillingerie. Woo-hoo! Thank you, Doc.

Sex pioneer and great husband. Let's see Charity Banks.

Hi. Come on up here. Did you want to wish me a happy birthday on that outfit? Wow.

Yeah. And we have Don Fernando who was on the show nine years ago. Don Fernando, nine years ago.

All right. Look at this. This is Charity Banks. Rich, plenty of leather. Wow.

Look at this outfit. Thank you, darling. Wow. But look at the model in the outfit. Yes. Whoa.

And how are you? I'm good. How are you? How did you pour yourself into that so beautifully? It took a lot of work.

Yeah. About 20 minutes. Wow. We have to have rubber neck row and you take pictures together up here

and your little latex out. It's like my little latex queens. Yes. So, you like birthdays?

I do. Who doesn't like birthdays at your age? Right? Let's try this hat. See if it stays on my head a little better.

Pink one. Yeah. Pink one now. So, how about spankings? Were you spanked as a child?

Yeah, actually I was. You were? It's the scariest thing in the world to me. It's the scariest thing in the world?

It was, yeah. Oh, it was. Wow. Well, look at all the girls checking out your ass. I mean, is it scary to you now

to have all these chicks checking out your amazing ass? Well, you've got cute panties on for Panny Boy. Thank you.

I remember Panny Boy. I thought of him today. You thought of Panny Boy. He'll be so delighted. He worries when people don't think of him.

By the way, is he tweeting? Has anyone got a tweet from Panny Boy? Or is he... So, yeah, he would love those little

navy blue and green. It matches my green tonight. It does. It goes with you. Yes, I'm doing the green thing.

So, now, you were spanked for being naughty or for having a birthday. Did you ever get a birthday spanking?

I never got birthday spankings. No? What do you think about birthday spankings? I think they're fun. Great idea.

Birthday spankings are when you're good as opposed to bad, because, you know, I guess you survived. You're here.

You are one year older and not... and, yeah, and you get to have a birthday party or something, I guess.

So, hey. So, you know, in my birthday party, I mean, I got spanked by Destin here and he whacked me so hard. That's it.

So, now, I'm going to give you a spanking, or I guess maybe my girls are going to give you a spanking.

Are you going to do spankings? I guess. Well, they've all been spanked. You've got ten minutes, doctor. Ten minutes?

I'm taking advantage of my ten minutes. Right? Yeah, did you want some agua before your spanking? You have twenty minutes, sorry.

I'll take one. One agua. All right. Let's have one. All right. So, now,

you have to lick the salt off of someone's body and it looks like a sin's ass that you're going to lick the salt off of.

Very good. And you're going to pull your top down because it's my birthday.

That sounds good. Who's in your lap there? Katie. Katie St. Ives.

Katie St. Ives. Hi, nice to meet you. Hello. Oh, listen to that voice. Wow. Are you old enough to be here? Yes.

When was your last birthday? December. Well, I mean, how old were you? She's twenty-one. I'm twenty-two. Oh, twenty-two?

Wow, you're old. Well, you're older than her. Yeah. Okay, by one year. Okay, so now,

you're going to be next, I guess, for something. I'm not sure what. Okay, so we are licking sin's sage's ass.

And I think the purpose of this is to get the salt. You don't need a purpose. Right? No, we don't.

Look what's happening right next to you. You got into the front row seat there, Graham. I'm damn lucky. Ah, and now Charity Bangs

is licking the salt up off of the butt. And down the hatch we go.

Yes, Agua. Cocoa leaf liqueur. And look at that body. Practically, you know, like you're a superhero.

I mean, that's how you look. You could have a cape and you would look perfect, right? Some kind of, I don't know,

heroine superhero. She certainly could be addictive like the junk. Okay, so now the spanking, the spanking.

Okay, spanking now. There we go. So I think I'm going to, yeah, I'll let you get across

both of our laps. And I'm going to sit right here, right next to your ass. Move this down.

And where's my mitt? Stretch out. Oh, there's the mitt. Okay, here we go.

So now we have Charity and down. Down, my dear. Yes, get those titties in my lap.

Yes, very good. Cry out in pain. Sin is going to do the honors. I think you should pull the panties down

because this is a latex bad girl. No, I think they're too sexy. They are sexy, but you know. I like seeing a sweet little G string

up a butt crunch. Well, panty boys does too, so. 18. Oh, she's only 18. What?

We just had the birthday. Oh, she's 21, actually. Spank her 21 times. She's 21.

Well, she's 53, and I'm going to say 53 times. Ah, yeah, there you go. Okay.

Oh, is this what is this? Panty boy has a message for us. Panty boy has a message.

Can I have sin sages panties please? I don't know, man. Well, when he says please, you've got to give them up.

But I love these panties. Oh, you've got to give them up for my birthday. I'll give you three more pairs. Oh, we're counting.

Six. Yeah. Here we go. Is that all panty boy has to say?

Can I have sin sages panties? Suffer for my birthday. You sinner. Yes.

21. And now we pull the panties down. Down, down, down. No, they don't come down.

Okay, these are stick on panties. They are. I like the glue. It's matching.

Okay. Oh, yes. The chinchilla. That does feel good.

Where did you get this? My client gave it to me. So I don't know. I'm not promoting them.

They sell them online. Do they? My client is a fur fetishist. Oh my goodness. I like your client.

Yes. I have some wonderful clients. You do. I do. I sure do.

All right. Charity bangs. Thank you for the birthday spanky. Oh, my pleasure, Miss Charity. Thank you for.

Oh, my pleasure. Let's see. Let's see. Oh, I wanted to know is a little miss. Lucy Chase.

Are you out there, Lucy? Lucy. Lucy LouiseHAB Lucy Blaise. No.

Oh, no. She was gonna squirt for me. I have saw these car breakdowns. Well, where's your lady?

She's dying. She's not feeling well. Oh. Okay.

Oh, that was the microphone. I see the microphone on the floor, and now the bonobos are on the floor. So let's get Miss Katie up here. Susie, excuse me, you have just a few minutes.

There's a cake that's back there. Ah, the cake. Well, let's say hi to Miss Katie right here for a moment. Hi, Katie, St. Ice.

Can you turn your microphone on? Is it on? I don't know. Hello?

Yeah, it sounds on. Okay. I've been meaning to come see you. Really?

Yes. Why? Kelly told me all about you. Kelly?

Mm-hmm. Don't believe a thing she said. Oh, okay. It's all just nasty rumors.

Well, you're even better than I thought you were going to be. Ah, better. That's a good word. Better.

How can you fault better? Okay. Well, so you're a porn star. Is that right?

I guess so, yes. I don't know. How do you define yourself? I'm taking her right in the sun.

Yes, you're... You've got to get both of those. Yeah, that's a nice mitten, huh? All right.

I am. Matches your outfit, too. You've got to say it safe. Sin is very inexpensive.

I'll take it. I'll take it. It's very inexpensive. I can do the same thing with my ass.

We're going to move it. We're going to bring the cake out here. All right, let's bring the cake out. Well, so we're going to have to put it on the bed.

We're going to put it on... We can't put it on here? No, it cannot. It's huge.

It won't fit there. No. It has to go there. On the bed.

Yes. But then no one can be in the bed. Then the cake will get all over the bed. It can't be here.

No, that couldn't be good, because I got stuff in the bed. Okay. How about the other bed?

But the cake won't fit there. Okay. Well... How about the other bed?

Right here. The cake won't fit right here. I think the cake will fit here. It'll fit right here.

We'll clear everything out. We'll clear everything out. You have to clear everything. Right, because the bed is for the people.

Okay. You know. And we should light all these. Okay, so let's clear that.

Let's get... Let's get some fire, where we have to... Now, don't worry about fire. Well, I want to light all these candles.

What candles? Actually, these candles are not lit. Okay. So where's...

Does someone have a lighter? Someone have a lighter? Take Susan. Yeah.

This bag here? Susie. Yeah. Get rid of that.

Okay. Yeah, we're going to bring it out here. Okay. Okay.

And, you know... Okay, but you know what? I should have more hot girls in my bed. And hot guys.

Anybody. Come on up here. Come on up. Come on up.

Come on up. Everybody come a little closer. Come on up. Come on up.

Hot girls. Hot boys. Come on up. Come on up.

Come on up. Come on up. Come on up. Everyone stand up.

Radic rock stars are like made for like these big, you know, huge stages. Yeah. Okay. Alright.

So... Alright. So Susie... Siuntel, you look scared.

Okay. Dr Susie? Yes. You're gonna...

Dr Susie? Yes Max. Yes. Look at me here, please.

I can hear you. Okay, here comes, here comes. Okay. Lily, Lily, come in here, come in here.

What are you doing? Why'd you put all your clothes on? Come on, come on. Kelly.

It just stood, it's a cake part. Kelly. I can't believe you. Give her the note, she's not...

Give her the note. What happened to this one? Don't worry, Susie. Just look at your note.

Susan. There's a note. Susan. Yes, I see the note.

Okay, this is a wonderful cake with a flower on the nipple from exoticcakes.com. What a beautiful cake.

It's totally detailed. So beautiful. Because I'm only one year old. It only has one candle.

We didn't want to put candles all over those beautiful breads. Right, right. Only on the one. Just on one nipple.

One nipple. We just lit up one nipple. I see. Beautiful.

Okay, well, I'm going to need some help blowing out this candle. So I want you to come up. Okay, I want you all to come up with me.

Because this is a very... Let's take some pictures of this. We are going to... We're going to get ready to blow out this candle.

This cake is an amazing cake. Can I have another lighter? Can I have another lighter? Lighter, lighter, lighter, lighter.

No one has a lighter. No one. No one has a lighter. No one has a lighter.

He is our savior. Yay. Gee, I hope it works. Okay.

So we have an amazing cake here. Can you light some of these other candles here? Just like these? Because it looks so lonely.

Okay, and here's a condom. Okay. Here we go. Here's...

Here, light that one too. We won't blow these ones out. Okay. So come closer.

Dr. Chantel, you look like you're going to get burnt. It's only... It's only one little candle. Okay.

Okay, here we go. Okay, now... Wait, wait, wait, no. Nipples out.

Nipples out. Okay. Okay. Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday dear Suzy. Happy birthday dear Suzy. Happy birthday to you. Yeah.

That's what I call a blowjob. Well, thank you all. I guess it's time to cut the cake, you know. And we're going to have some singing from Fogel Foot.

And we're going to have some music by DJ Leo. And DJ Leo is our DJ tonight. And who else? We got all kinds of stuff going on.

But we're all excited to celebrate. Birthday spanking. Spankings are still going on. And we just love you all.

Let's see, let's cut the cake. What time is it? Are we done? No.

We have seven minutes. We have seven minutes. All right. So let's find out what everybody is.

I want to give out presents and talk to people about where they are from. Okay. So do you like panties?

Or you just wear a masculine... What are you wearing under those? Take them off. I know what I have for you.

I have a... Okay. Everybody sit down. Come on, come on.

Down, down, down. Woo. Okay. You're free to go.

Oh, but she doesn't want to now. Okay. And here you go. You've got six minutes.

Screaming. Oh, cockering. Where's the microphone? Where's the microphone?

There it is. Give it to me again. Here's the screaming. Oh, cockering.

Oh, screaming. Oh. Somebody take a picture of him with a screaming oh. And have you...

Do you like to wear cockerings? I don't wear cockerings very often, but I do enjoy them when I do. And the fact that it's vibrating

makes it extra pleasurable for everyone. Well, it does. It really does. Yeah.

Do you like a cockering, Rubber Necro? Yeah. Do you like a cockering? Yeah.

Five minutes. Five minutes. I do. Okay.

So we need to get everybody's information. I guess that's a lot of people's information though. Cockering. Screaming.

Oh. Oh, look at you. Yeah. Did you get one?

You didn't get one. Well, you know what? You're going to get a pocket rocket. Ah.

Who's got the microphone? Whoever has the microphone. I love this one. You love it.

The pocket rocket makes me come so hard. And it's so strong. And it's just compact. I could take it in my purse.

It's great. You know, you guys are like facing backwards. Remember, this is... We're still on stage.

Okay? You're... You've got four minutes. I mean, they've got such nice booty.

Four minutes, Susan. Four minutes. You know, it's okay, I guess. All right, get into the bed.

Get into the bed. Everybody, into the bed. With your booty. Yeah.

Are you wearing panties? No. No, here. Pick your panties.

I have batteries for the pocket rockets. Yes, of course I do. Of course I have batteries. You're a doctor.

Yes. You have four minutes. I'm just hoping my technical department... Yeah, well, I don't know if everybody's going to be giving out their information.

You know, I think that's a lot of information, right? I think it's more important that... Yeah, look, Rubber Neckro's putting on the panties. They match you.

They match you. Lovely. The black and red. And we need somebody to cut the cake.

We do. But I guess we could do that after the show. What? We're going to do that after, Susan.

Okay. And... And, yes. And what do you want to say?

Where did the cake come from? The cake came from ExoticCakes.com. Right, ExoticCakes.com. And it's a beautiful Exotic Cake.

Very detailed. Beautiful, very large breasts. If anyone likes large breasts. Oh, whoops.

Look at this. Lily Kay told me she had to leave early. I do have to leave. You know, but she could not resist getting the Bacchanal going right now.

With our guest wearing very pretty black panties for Panty Boy. With white trim. Katie St. Ives. Katie St. Ives.

Welcome to the Speak Easy. Happy birthday. See, that's what happened. Look at these panties are beautiful.

I put them on out in the car earlier. You did? Yeah, just for you. Wow.

Just for me, I think. And for Panty Boy, of course. Yes. They're beautiful black lace panties.

Wow. Did she make, you have a G-spot orgasm? Yeah, she touched something. And carries your pocket rocket.

You had a birthday orgasm for me. Thank you. You're welcome. I wasn't expecting that.

No, I wasn't either. Well, I know when Lily's around, there's going to be some hotness. Lily goes wild. And how about spanking?

You want the spanking now? The birthday spanking. Okay. That lay across all of our laps.

All of your laps? Yes. You're the new girl. I'll do her spanking.

This is like a sorority thing. I'll do her spanking. Right? She wants to do my spanking.

You're going to do it. Okay. Well, then you got to get your ass in the right position. But laying across all the laps.

Okay. I think you, I don't know. You gals, come over here. We're doing a spanking.

I think they're doing something else. I have two. Okay. So I don't know.

It was my first experience with you. It was amazing. It was the same thing. Ah, I'm stuck.

Where did you come from? Seriously. Oh, bushes are awesome. We all have, bush, bush.

What? I have a little hair. But you know, yeah. Well, it's my birthday.

It's my birthday. Okay. Everybody show their birthday bush. Oh, look at that.

That's quite a bush. Wow. Beautiful. Yes.

Well, you know what they call this room? The womb room. That's right. Okay.

So, hey, come on over here. Charity. You sit right here. Or yeah.

Well, if you're going to spank her, you're in the wrong end. Oh no. She's coming on this end. Okay.

Okay. Got it. Okay. So you come over here.

Right? Come right over here. Okay. And then you, I don't know.

I'm going to crawl across all of you. Yes. You are. You are the new girl.

Take my feet. Take my feet. Whoa. Yeah.

Oh my God. And she's got a beautiful booty here. She does. Oh, and look at these panties.

Look at this beautiful booty. So how many are we giving? How many? Oh, she's 22.

She's 22. Don't you spank though, because you spank too hard. You're not allowed to spank. And just, you have to be, I know you're very aware.

I'm just telling you to just keep, keep, keep very, very cool there. We are closing the show. Or I mean, up to you, but it's 12 o'clock. Right.

We're having a final spanking here. Okay. 22. Okay.

And where's the microphone? Where's, who's got the mic? See, you've lost the mic. Sasha, you've got the mic.

It's right here. Oh, I have it right here. Okay. There we go.

Okay. You hold the microphone. Somebody count. We're going to do 22.

Justin, hold the microphone. I'm holding the mic. Okay. You got it.

Hold it by the, the, but don't hit her with the mic. Okay. Here we go. Everyone's ready to count?

We're ready. And one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22. And for good luck.

Yay. All right. We got the chinchilla. Happy birthday, everybody.

Happy birthday to Dr. Susie. We love you. Oh, thank you so much. Happy birthday.

Thank you so much. And now the chinchilla. Oh, you spanked her hard. See?

Oh, and thank you, Destin. My pleasure. And thank you so much. Pretty Katie.

And thank you, Charity. And thank you, Sasha. And we're going to hear from Fogelfoot. And thank you, Dr. Chantel.

Thank you, Michael. And, and I don't know. Sin, sin. And, oh, there she is.

Rubber neck row. Oh, hey. And sin's got bush too. Rubber neck row, do you have bush?

No. Let me see your no bush. Bush is coming back in. Oh, that's so hard.

I'm very happy about that. I'm shaved. You're shaved. Look at that.

I'm shaved, too. Oh, and you've got those panties too. Well, let the cameras see. Turn around.

Turn around. Turn around. Because we've had all these beautiful bushes, we have to have the invisible bush.

I am so thrilled about this. I've had the idea that everyone in Southern California is fully shaved and is getting old. Like, some, some, some hair.

She's got beard like you. Have you seen Katie say eyes here? No, I haven't. She's got major brush.

All right. We're going to have cake. We're going to spank. We're going to celebrate.

We're going to dance. We're going to listen to Fogelfoot. We're going to listen to DJ Leo. I want to thank you all for celebrating my birthday

with me tonight. You've been awesome. And let's continue to celebrate. Happy birthday to everybody.

Thank you so much for all the wonderful gifts and all the wonderful joy and all the wonderful orgasm. Yes.

It's time to make like bonobos. Everybody, come on over here. Taking photo ops. Make like bonobos, not baboos.

Make love, not more. Make love to someone you love. Thank you.