Air Date: 10/22/2011 There’s nothing like a joyride on a nice hard broomstick to celebrate the witching season. And one wild, high-flying, enchanted joyride—with dizzying twists, turns, squirts and rolls in the corpses—is just what this show is. Opening with an invocation to witches through history and featuring all kinds of swallowing—from sword dildos to real 27-inch swords—as well as masturbation, golden showers, spanking, fetish Barbie dolls and hilarious, insightful, explosive Weapons of Mass Discussion from my many sexy, lively, dead and undead guests, this Halloweenish show is more fun than a hearse-full of porn stars.

It’s funny how the last Saturday of Masturbation Month always falls in the middle of Memorial Day Weekend. How are we to conjoin such odd bedfellows? Manhandle those hot dogs, boys! Mash those potatoes, ladies! Memorial Day signals the start of summer, heating up with sexy fun and the sizzling smell of fresh barbeque. Of course, Memorial Day is also a requiem for the dead—the people who have been barbequed in America’s Perma-Wars. The American dead, that is. The other dead can get their own holiday, right? Memorial Day is for America’s dead soldiers. We are the Masturbation Nation serving the Multi-National Corporations of America (even if they’re based in Hong Kong).

It’s funny how the last Saturday of Masturbation Month always falls in the middle of Memorial Day Weekend. How are we to conjoin such odd bedfellows? Manhandle those hot dogs, boys! Mash those potatoes, ladies! Memorial Day signals the start of summer, heating up with sexy fun and the sizzling smell of fresh barbeque. Of course, Memorial Day is also a requiem for the dead—the people who have been barbequed in America’s Perma-Wars. The American dead, that is. The other dead can get their own holiday, right? Memorial Day is for America’s dead soldiers. We are the Masturbation Nation serving the Multi-National Corporations of America (even if they’re based in Hong Kong).