XXXMas Saturnalia 2005

Full transcript of XXXMas Saturnalia 2005 on The Dr. Susan Block Show:

our house to your house, from our bedroom to your bedroom. Here she is, my doctor and your doctor, Dr. Susie Block. Lovers and sisters, lovers and sinners. Triple X-mas elves, Hanukkah clowns, Ramadan genies and winter solstice witches.

All you children of sex, and we are all children of sex. I want to welcome you to the womb room of Dr. Susan Block's speakeasy cathedral of our Lord and Lady of Faith-Based Sex. Come, let us play.

Tis the holiday season, so here's wishing you one that's merry and bright. With not too much in the way of holiday blues, but lots of good cheer, good works and good sex

to chase those blues away. This is not so unholy as you might think. In ancient pagan times, before anyone conjured up Christmas, Hanukkah, Ramadan, Kwanzaa, online shopping, Faith-Based Mega-Malls,

before they even invented the Walmart. People celebrated the winter solstice with great festivals of fire to chase away the cold and light, to chase away the darkness and fun to chase away the blues and sex.

Lots of sex to honor the icy season. Our polytheistic forebears would feast and fornicate for days and nights of non-stop bacchanalian orgies that would make Jenna Jamison pee in her G-string.

Over 2,000 years before Christianity, Mesopotamia's winter carnival featured mummer-style parades with floats carrying scenes of sex among the gods. The Greek Winter Festival celebrated another son of God

with a human mother who worked miracles, was associated with wine and resurrected after death. His name was Dionysus. The Roman Saturnalia presided over by old father time

chortling Ho Ho Ho Saturnalia included the first X-mas carols which were truly X-rated as the carolers would sing in the noon winter solstice or son birthday. Was and is when the sun after being at its lowest ebb

is born again as the days begin to get longer the nights. To the ancients' winter holiday sex was more than just a personal pleasure or a cool way to keep warm, though it sure was that. But it was more.

It was an ecstatic communal coming together celebrating the erotic fecundity of life in the dead of winter. Red, hot, hope in a season of cold blue despair. Which brings us to this winter, if you're listening to me live right now

which sometimes seems like a super sized season of cold blue despair and I ain't just talking about the weather. I mean, just look at us noble Americanos having been cheerleaded into perma war by a chicken hawk pussy named Bush

and a dickless dickhead named Dick. Bush and Dick, syncing into a blood drenched Mesopotamian quagmire of big lies, body bags, torture, no WMDs, oh, except the ones that we brought with us.

But plenty of destruction, horrific mutilation, and death, death, and nobody wins. But I ran. Meanwhile back in the homeland we've got debt, debt, and more debt.

Mm-hmm, what do we owe, like 8 billion, mostly to China and Japan. We've got the Katrina debacle. We've got, well, the Patriot Acts and, of course, the Bushes spying illegally on American citizens.

The bulldozing of sweet reason by wrathful religion. A war of hypocrisy on consensual pornography rapidly turning into a war on art. A war on women's rights.

A resurgence of crazed homophobia. Mostly coming from the major monotheistic religions, despite the fact that the leaders of most of the major monotheistic religions dress like funky drag queens.

You know, ho ho ho. A corporate media that gives prostitution a bad name. Speaking of ho ho ho ho ho ho's. Fox, CNN, the New York Times.

Ho ho ho ho ho's. all of them and a so-called opposition party whose positions are the same as the power party. I stepped up war on drugs with over two million people in prison in a prison system in which the state sponsors murder of a Nobel Peace Prize candidate and calls it.

Coupled with the perfectly legal pharmaceutical drugging of America, not to mention the sacking of America, the poor getting poorer as Bush and Dick's cronies get richer and especially the arms makers, the military industrial complex that old president Ike warned us about. We are shooting ourselves in the feet and the eyes with our fancy phallic guns as Osama sits back

and like a mafia chic and the mother of us all. The earth suffers and sputters under the pollution of her children. Who knows if we are one nation under God? What we do know is that we are under one big honkin' hole in the ozone layer.

Yes indeed, a winter of despair which gives us all the more reason to beat those bloody holiday blues and beat the system of war by beating our drums and our thuns and our clits and our conjuring up the red hot power of pleasure and hope and love and science and creativity and the bonobo way, the power of one over the forces of coldness.

The ancients believed that holiday sex encouraged crops to grow. Hey, it's less of a stretch than virgin motherhood, okay? And they also believed it allowed productivity to increase. Of course, America's once-vaunted productivity has long gone to China.

But a little holiday sex can still heat things up, releasing frustrations, igniting personal revolutions. This is why the authorities try to confine sex to procreation because recreation leads to revolution. Because sex is knowledge, eaves, first bite, delicious apple. Because sex is the small precious truth behind the big lie, baby.

Mmm, even when it's a little bit naughty, it is a deeply spiritual experience. This being within the tradition of winter solstice, to be a bit naughty, a bit back an alien, to make the fool into a king, well, unless the fool already is the king, you know, to break on through to the other side and assert the wild, righteous power of arrows over Thanatos, sex over death.

Don't hurt anybody now, but do go on a holiday sex adventure tonight. I want you to infuse it with a sense of sacred, naughty, solstice power, resistance to permawall, and a commitment to love. Yes indeed, praise the Lord, and the Lady, and the Snake.

But alas, we are not all lords and ladies, at least not all the time. We are human, and we have problems, especially with sex, and I surely don't have all the answers. But I must say, despite my sublime modesty, that I have got better answers than, say, Brother Pat here, Pope Rat, though I've always had to have a soft spot for a man in a dress.

Mmm, with a big hat. But please, the Pope can't help you with your sex life, okay? I might be able to. So if you want to talk to me about any aspect of your sexuality,

whether you're watching me live on the web this crazy holiday daisy season, or on your boob tube in July, it don't matter, the show is timeless. And you can call me at 213-749-1330. That's 213-749-1330 if you're in the Los Angeles area, or outside North America.

If you're in North America but outside LA, you call me at 1-866-289-7068. We got some really hot holiday guests tonight, and very excited. But I do want to talk with you, too. The numbers to call are 1-866-289-7068 and 213-749-1330.

Merry Hanukkah, everybody! Happy Christmas! Good Ramadan! Happy Kwanzaa! Happy Winter Solstice!

Happy Bodhi Day! Happy Panchagana Party! Those are the Buddhist and Hindu winter holidays. Happy Saturnalia!

And Happy Eros Day! That's coming soon, and that is the sexiest holiday of the year. Happy, happy Ho Ho Ho Pimps and Hoes. We pimping for peace, baby.

We pimping for peace on Earth. Pleasure for all. And yes, pleasure means sex. Pleasure means food.

Pleasure means air. Clean air. And shelter and health care and music. And freedom from oppression.

Freedom from bombs. Drop bras. Not bombs. That's our motto.

And that's our goal. And the goal is the journey. And the journey is the show. Which will go on with our first very exciting holiday guest in just a moment.

So don't come yet. And don't go away. We'll be right back. You've been listening to Radio Susie One, and that was Dr. Susan Block.

You all see the clap sign up there? Let's hear it! Let's clap! And Howard, we want to welcome you to Yahoo! We want to welcome you to Cyrus Radio.

And it's the first time that we're at the same level. From Los Angeles, California, you're listening to Revolution and Evolution. Take these bums out. These are criminals.

The worst kinds of criminals that this country has seen. Can I have Mioko and Kat? Mioko and Kat. No matter where you are right now, unless we've bombed your electricity and you have no electricity,

you can watch us. You can listen to us. One second. One second. And peace.

Cameras. Switch over here. Where's the camera, people? We're missing a camera. Come on. Come on. Come on.

Cameras. The snakes bother you. She won't hurt you. Delicious.

Hey, hey, Amber. How are you doing? Amber, you look great. You look like a real Christmas elf. An ex-miss elf. An ex-miss elf.

Move my pussy here before you smash it. This is the pussy I was referring to. I have a few pissies. Okay.

Here we go. So, okay, so these, I can use both cordless and cord, okay? All right. Okay, let me take these.

Oh, no, actually I want to do a little intro here. Do-do. Okay. And who are you looking for, Mioko?

I'm looking for Kat. Mioko's here. Okay, and Kat? And Amber, I'm going to have you on in a minute. So just hang on.

Oh, hey, Kat. Hi. You look different. You have hair.

Okay, so can you get up a second? Yep, please. Okay, and you can actually sit over here, Amber. You-you guys get in here.

I can tell this is going to be a full bed all night long. That's all right. Okay, you get in here. Okay, very good.

And you get over here. And I'm just going to do a short little intro regarding the dancing theme we're going about to do. And so you can sit over there, okay? And you get a microphone.

Give me those three microphones. Okay. And do we want to give them a handheld ha-ha- No, I mean wired or wireless?

I don't know. All right. Okay, so are we back? Somebody tell me if we're back.

And sit back a little bit. Testing one, two, three. You can see the monitor there. So just kind of approach up there, Amber.

You can try to approach me. Just back there. You can put your legs up here so I can see the monitor there. So I can see what is going out in the heavens.

And we're back with Dr. Susie and her guests. All right. And you're listening to Radio Susie 1 on the World Wide Web. Welcome back to my big brass bed,

which I'm now sharing with the Dark DJ. Bring it down just a little bit. Dark DJ Adam Wiggins. We're in the Garden of Eden with Snake Evie

and our ladies of perpetual striptease. I'm going to introduce them to you in just a moment. That is our theme right now tonight as a very special holiday gift.

We are going to show you how to strip for your lover. How to strip, baby. We are delving into ancient history tonight and dancing is probably the world's oldest art form.

People have been dancing probably since shortly after they started walking. Maybe even as they started walking. And some of the first dances they did were erotic dances. Also known as fertility dances.

Now a certain kind of erotic dance involved stripping. Stripping is also a very old art form. Probably as soon as people started wearing clothes they started taking off their clothes

in a kind of sexy, sensuous way. You know what I'm saying? Stripping is a very simple but... A University of Chicago sex survey found

that the second most common turn on basically next to screwing is watching someone you find sexy taking off their clothing.

And my first guess are experts in the art of striptease. We have here our old friend Kat and our new friend, Mioko. And here's Amber, also is in bed with us.

But we have microphones for you ladies. Get very close to your mics. So yeah, very good. Now Mioko, you're new so we'll let you speak first.

And you've also written this book. The Practical Striptease. And people might recognize you from Playboy. They might, it's been a while, but they might recognize you.

It's been a while, how long a while? Oh God, how old are my children? You're both moms! That's right, you're two stripping moms.

That's really cool. That's what you have to hold on to when you're a mom and you're busy doing everything. You do, you have to hold on to your start.

That sensual side, exactly. Your sexuality. And let hold of your clothing sometimes. Got to.

Prefer to be naked, in fact my daughter said to me, Mommy, did you forget to put your jammy thong? So I woke up naked. Yeah, I forgot.

But just being naked is not quite the striptease. Absolutely not. Tell us about the art of the striptease according to Mioko.

I know Gypsy Rose Lee, her philosophy was anything worth doing is worth doing slowly. But this is television, baby, and we don't have a lot of time. And I was never that kind of stripper.

I was always a fast, angry kind of stripper. Fast and angry. Kind of like my Dark DJ's music. Yeah, there you go.

Very fast and angry. But you know, striptease in itself, the word in itself, it's all about the tease. It's all about, you know, eluding to something,

suggesting something, communicating something. It's not about the needy. I think it's about anticipation. Sure.

Yeah, go for it, Kat. Get right in there. To ever end. The anticipation is always there,

that's the exciting part. When you have to be like... Well, that's like the best sex, too. I mean, if you just go in there and

bada-bing, bada-bing. Bada-bing. It's not that exciting. But you prolong and you anticipate.

Yes. That's why we take a long time with our text setup here at the show. That's exactly the reason.

We want you to really appreciate it once we're on. Once you go. Yeah.

So, this is a practical book. This teaches you the moves. If you can actually flip through that, it's an illustrated guide.

I guess I should have read this. I'm sure you know what you're doing. I haven't seen you dance, but I'm sure you know what you're doing.

You probably both know what you're doing. I know you both do. I mean, I know you do, because I've seen you dance

and she's an incredible. I consider you very tribal. Thank you. Thank you.

Yeah, that is a compliment. Yeah. And you, I don't know. You've never seen me dance.

I haven't seen you dance. But I mean, the book is really about breaking it down so that everyday women can do it.

Break it down just a little bit right now. What should they remember about how to strip

for their love? Oh, God. As a gift. Maybe a holiday gift.

Well, the most important thing is definitely eye contact and communication. Because if you're not telling

a story with what you're doing, then it's really not that interesting. You really need to be talking. Now, what if you're cross-eyed like me?

What do you do? You know, it's funny that you say that because I am too. That's why I'm wearing glasses.

Oh, OK. There you go. I have a lazy eye. You do that.

I noticed that. I went, oh. OK. She's cross-eyed like me.

That's that sexy cross-eyed thing. Study the eye contact thing. Yeah. Well, so then what's the next thing

if you're not too good with the eye contact? No, that works for you, though. The lazy eye works.

It's like they never actually know what exactly you're looking at. All right. But you've got the eye contact.

Always be interested in what you're doing. Because if you're not, then it's not interesting to them. OK.

You know? Don't get on top of unsteady furniture. Oh, right. Back to bed.

Done that. Yeah. Done it and tried it. It doesn't work.

What's the other basic thing? You know, having a theme is really great because it gives them something to do.

You know, that's really funny because I was just going to say if you're nervous, you can get the moves.

Right. So you don't have a lot of Well, don't choreograph. Don't choreograph.

Don't plan. Get in the way. Right. You can't plan.

Do you choreograph cat or do you not at all? Oh, we'll see, though. Just go with the feel.

You go with the music. You go with the moves. You follow about the music. You know, but ultimately

you have to pick that music. You have to have some kind of a plan, I guess, but not really.

But that's the way you got to break down the moves or in the moves and it's all muscle memory

from there. Your body just does it and you're in the moment. Do you remember

your first strip tease? Either of you? Yeah. I remember the first time

I stripped for my lover. Yeah. How was that? And it was really

actually the beginning of it was kind of funny because we lived in one room place.

Yeah. So I stuck them in the bathroom. And I said

you sit in the bathroom for a while and I set up. Oh, you set it all up?

Yeah. Nice. Just candles. We got to set the mood

lighting. Things that, yeah. Candles make a big huge difference.

There's a lot of candles and music and a chair in the middle.

Just a chair for him to sit in. music playing. Simple.

Finally brought them out stuck them in the chair and started playing music.

And it was it was fun and he had no idea

what took place. Right? It was kind of a surprise. But since then

every time is still really fun. It's still And what made you

want to do it? It's the music but also the fact

that he looks at me like he really wants me. Oh.

So It's about the passion. It's about Brad,

what's the matter with you? I want you. No, he does. He does.

But more so when you're stripping. I really want you and I hear the music

and have a couple drinks. Well, and she's putting it out there though. She's putting it out there.

You really want me is really what you're saying. Well, actually,

I know since he's my lover he already thinks that I'm really sexy. Right.

It is a bit of a risk, of course. You are putting yourself out there. So there is a risk but

But it's very empowering to be shown. It is empowering. That sexual side.

And is this the message you wish to give to

Middle America or Middle Earth I mean everyone who's watching

and listening if you're in the cheap sheet seats. You know,

the message is stripped for peace. I mean, what is it?

What does stripping do for you? Why should people strip? I think that's totally empowerment. It's just,

you know, we live in a world where women have all these confused messages

going on about, you know, their body. Their body is

right. But dress like a tramp but don't be slutty. And, you know,

so I mean, stripped is just that way of expression for women, I think.

And it's one thing that I've taught six-year-old women how to strip

and I've taught 300-pound women how to strip and it's amazing to me

that they all can do the stripper move. To see one of those workshops. That's really fun.

With the 300-pound women. I'm amazed at the, just, you know, the flexibility,

the fact that they can do the stripper move. But they're, you know,

our bodies are meant to do that. Yeah. That's the way our body works, you know.

Oh, I love that. But you think only women's bodies are meant to do that? I mean,

men are the cocks I'm sure men are too. I don't find many men that want me

to teach them how to strip. I like to watch my men strip. Is it great? I do.

I think, I think both, all sexes, let's say,

should, should practice. Well, they should have that freedom.

We should, we should, we should. So, Amber,

you've been sitting there so quietly. Tell us your, I don't know if you're a stripper.

You're a dancer. I haven't seen you strip. You're a dancer. Do you have a strip?

Oh. Well, on certain occasions, certain occasions,

on holiday, maybe, maybe. What's your,

do you have a philosophy of stripping or a philosophy of erotic? Of swimming parties,

I will strip. Serene. Yes. We will have nothing on.

We will be dancing. Okay. And do you have a philosophy of stripping?

A philosophy? Um, well, basically, a hint,

helpful suggestion? Um, we take everything off and we usually dance to get to

the girls and I. The girls and I. Really? In numbers.

Yeah. No guys. No, we dance very sexual

and it turns everybody on and they want to, like, run to the group room.

Mmm. Okay. Well, I think we've got a group

room right here. I mean, not everybody but us. It's just a group

in the room. The whole room. Definitely. All right.

I, I feel, I feel that we've been talking a lot

about this. I'd like to see some kind of demonstration. Is that?

Yeah. Okay. Can I see a demonstration from something?

Yeah, where exactly is I going to have? Well, I would say right here.

We'll, we'll lift our feet up and you're going to dance right,

because the cameras are right there and the people are over there. So,

this would be kind of a small space. I mean, we could have

a guy up here to play the husband. I'd like my lover to

play the husband. Are you saying you want to go first? I think she is.

Oh, sorry. I'm going to go first. Okay. Is that the husband

or the guy or the John? Uh, Dr. Suzy.

Yes. We have a caller on line one. His name is Robert and he's calling from

San Fernando. Okay. And he'd like to talk to you about an issue that he has

with his wife. His wife. So,

don't anybody panic here, Suzy. We're going to try and do this now.

So, here we go. Okay. John.

Right? Robert. Robert. No, that's John.

No, that's Brad. Ding, ding. And sit back a little bit, Amber.

Can you? Uh, Susan. Yes. That caller is on line one.

Hello. Hello. Robert. Robert.

Hi, Robert. How are you doing? I'm doing good. Okay.

Except the feedback is in my ears. Okay, Robert. Uh-huh.

Okay. Speak up a little, darlin. Okay. And Mike.

We got some advice for you. Uh, my wife wants to be with two guys. She wants to be with two guys. Uh-huh.

And we eat a lot. Oh, really? This is something that is all her idea

and none of yours. Yeah, hers. You're not interested in this at all?

Or, what does it make you feel, Robert?

Um, I don't know. I mean, I'd like to know.

Okay, that's good. I'm glad. I wouldn't want her to force you into that.

Not that she's asking him to be with two guys. She's asking him to watch. Just to watch.

Yeah. Well, she doesn't want you to participate. Is that right?

Right. Well, how do you feel about that? I think I'm going to like it.

You think you're going to like it? You know, a lot of guys like watching,

you know, of course. Watching sounds good.

Well, he needs a little cheerleading, I think. Yeah,

he needs the experts to say, yeah, that when he's doing his job, go for it.

It's okay. It's okay to watch. Practice safe sex. Your wife,

that is. Yeah. Make sure the guys wear condoms and,

you know, just are very safe about what they're doing. You don't know where they've been.

But other than that, he didn't like that answer. Either that or,

I don't know what happened there. Right. Yeah, cool. He was talking about

right now. He wanted him to watch. He's right here. And now,

they're ready to go. I guess so. They're doing it. All right.

So we're ready to go. Susan. Yes. We have a caller from Van Nuys

who would like to talk to you about his fantasy. His fantasy.

He's on line two. What's his name? Oh, his name is Adam.

Adam. Adam. I don't know if it's Adam and Eve guys,

but, you know, it's Adam. Hi, Adam. Hello.

Hold on a second. We're going to be right with you. All right. Adam, are you there?

Yeah. Hi, Adam. Speak up, darling, so we can hear you.

Can you hear us, Adam? Yeah. You can hear me good? Yeah.

Okay. What's on your mind, darling? I'm not having a girl problem.

I just had a fantasy of having a phone sex. You have a fantasy of what? Having a phone sex.

You have a fantasy of having phone sex? Yeah. Okay.

With feedback, I hope. That's your favorite kind of phone sex, I'm sure.

Yeah. Okay. I cannot hear him now. You can't hear me?

No. Well, now I hear you. Okay. So what were you saying,

darling? I said with three of you. With three of us. Actually, there's four of us

right at the moment, but maybe you don't see everyone. You want to have sex.

How about four? Would that be okay? Five. That'd be all right?

Five. That's fine. Or do you want a guy too? No.

No? No guys? How about some dildos? Are you going to satisfy

all four of us? That's fine. You're going to do it? I'm going to do it.

You're a pasha. I can't hear him. What? Hello?

Yeah. Hi. Speak up. Hello.

How are you? How are you doing? Hello. Hi there.

Yeah. Speak up a little. So tell me. Describe your fantasy

in one sentence. In one sentence? Yeah. The most pleasurable experience

ever. That's not very descriptive. Obviously, a fantasy is going to be pleasurable,

the most pleasurable. That doesn't give us anything to go on. You better call me.

Something that tells me, you know, do you want us all to be worshiping your phallic symbol?

Do you want us to be, you know, giving you a golden shower? Do you want to watch us?

Oh, you want to watch us with each other? Okay, well, stay tuned. Just, you know,

get back on your computer there and, you know, things will unwind if you give us a chance.

All right? All right. You stay tuned. Okay, darling?

All right. And you're listening to the Dr. Susan Block show. You might even be watching us.

Whichever are numbers 2-1-3-7-4-9-13-30, if you're in Los Angeles or outside,

well, yeah, if you're in Los Angeles or outside North America. If you're inside North America

but outside Los Angeles, it's 1-8-6-6-2-8-9-7-0-6-8. I'm in bed with Kat and Mioko

and Amber. And Mioko just wrote a book called The Practical Striptease, which you can get where?

Practicalstriptease.com. There you go. Or Amazon. Okay, you want to promote

your whatever? I don't have anything to promote. You don't? Okay, very good.

She just wants a strip for you. Oh, okay. All right. Are we ready for a striptease?

Did we need to do anything before the striptease? Can I? Something else.

Let's do something else. Come on. No. Okay.

We are ready for the striptease now. Okay? And you like this music?

You like the dark DJ? I brought some music. You brought some music. And I gave it to him.

And you gave it. Okay. Very good. All right.

So now we have Katz Man. Manly man. Right? Come forward.

So we move? Yeah. Okay. Here we go.

I think this is probably good. I never will. No, you're sitting here and she's going to dance around

this way. Where am I going to dance? Oh, well, okay. You're just going to have to

dance around. We have a camera to come in from the side. The camera too is offline.

The cameraman knows. Okay. Camera one, just keep everything going. I mean, well, we could have a chair

set up right here, I guess. Right where? We have to have it right here. This is where the lights are.

Okay. So. Where? Sit where?

What little box thing? Yeah. But then the lights will not be on you.

Oh, right. Okay. But then you won't be able to get into his lap and do a lap dance.

Don't you do a lap dance? Don't you? Yeah. Goddess, can you?

She's right in the middle here. Actually, we're going to, I think this whole thing is going to be moving in here.

So either you're going to get dances or you have to move. Okay. I'm going to let somebody else

figure this out because, you know. Hey, Holly. I thought I saw Holly. Maybe I didn't.

All right. So you guys figured out quickly, please. And then we need the music.

Okay. We have a problem. Are my clowns here yet? You know what?

While we're having problems. Try the Pisco. At first, when I heard about this, I thought it was something

Mistress Genevieve does to Sissy Maid, the Pisco. It's the Pisco. It's a wonderful drink.

Pisco Carollo. It's, where's it from? Peru? I think it's from Peru.

And it's delicious with juice. Juices of all sorts. What's that? That's six and a half.

Sounds good. What? Yeah. Feel the audience.

All right. And what are you drinking, ma'am? Come closer to me. Now we're going to sit here

and enjoy her. You're going to kind of get a little foreplay for your own dance here by watching her.

What are you drinking? Nothing. Would you like a drink? We have all kinds of libations.

It's a holiday night. So you've never touched a snake? Would you like to try? Just a little touch.

Very good. No, she doesn't freak out. No. Let's see.

What do I have here? Oh, yes. Of course, for the holidays, we have the green fairy.

The winter solstice green fairy. Absent, absent. Made from legal wormwood and very green. It's beautiful.

When somebody who drinks gets up on stage, we'll have some. Are we ready for the strip tease? Yeah?

Okay. Are we white balanced? We are white balanced. All right, so we're going to watch.

Lean back against the government leaders here. Hey, Amber, we're watching. Dr. Suzy, we have a couple of callers, if you're interested.

Well, right now I think we're going to have a strip tease. Okay, we're going to have a little strip tease so you guys hang on to your... So callers, just tell the callers to hang on.

They can hear you. Especially if they're good. I love you callers. Don't go away.

I just have a strip tease about to happen. You know how it is. If you had a strip tease about to happen in front of your face,

you wouldn't take a call either. All right. All right. Here we have Kat, the magnificent.

You've got a wire under you. Hold on. And you. He do.

Beautiful. He's just sitting there. They're like, hey, when are you coming to me? Yeah.

Why aren't you getting on my lap right now? Alex, you... Can you give him a lap dance? I think he wants one.

All right. I think... Can we continue it a little bit? Can you move a little bit over this way?

Just turn your body that way. I want to see a little dancing in the lap now. Right? Do we want to see some lap?

Actually lap? Or am I wrong? Lap? Can I hear an amen?

Amen. Can I hear an A-women? Amen. A-women.

All right. A little lap. Okay. Music again, please.

A little lap. A little lap, baby. I want to see if that shared pussy greases up the letter. Got a WMD.

Oh. Or are you happy to see me? Look at the mistletoe. Let's hear it for Kat.

A hot strip tease. Our Kat. Kitty Kat. Oh.

A very nice kitty. Yeah, yeah. That's beautiful. All right.

So you enjoyed it, BD? Yeah. A hearty, yes. Pretty good.

Parts of it. Yeah, right. What did you think as an expert, Mioko? How would you rate that?

Well, she obviously knows what she's doing. Yeah. She had the eye contact. Right.

She had the moves. You know, she's not a novice by any means. Right. But is it your style?

Is that how you do it? No. No, you have a different style. Well, yeah.

Of course. We all have a different style. We all do, you know. Dr. Suzy.

Yes. We have a caller on line one. His name is Jesse. Jesse James.

He's calling from Chatsworth, California. Jesse. And he has a problem. He cannot please his girlfriend.

I don't know what kind of problem that is. But he's on line two. Okay. And we're going to try and connect him right now.

Let's try. Okay. Are you there, caller? Will.

Hi, Jesse. Hi. I'm having problems with my girlfriend. All right.

What kind of problems? Yes. I'm really good with my fingers. She says I'm a goddess with my fingers,

with massages and stuff. But she says I'm not pleasuring enough with the whole sex thing. So you give a great massage,

but when it comes to doing the nasty itself, it's, you know, right? Yeah. Really?

Yeah. How about going downtown, darling? Are you any good at that? Yes, I am.

I'm really good at that. Okay. So you're a good cunning linguist. Yes.

Very good. Okay. Now, so we're down to it. We're down to just like boink in the oink in here.

Right? You don't, what position do you do? My girlfriend says that I'm really good. Like she gets orgasms and just gets massages from me

and stuff like that. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

Well, you're great masseuse. That's good. You can get a job doing that. Yeah.

But in the meantime, you want to have sex, right? Yeah. I really want to have sex. Okay.

So what is her complaint? What does she say you're not good at exactly? Well, I'm just not, you know, giving in too much. I'm not, you know, really, she's not having fun, I guess.

You know? She doesn't have orgasms? Yeah. But she has orgasms when you go down on her?

Yeah. Okay. Well, why don't you go down on her and then just go inside real quickly after that and maybe she won't know.

She'll just be in the throws. That's the best way to get it, you know, get it in there. Right after she comes, she's just a wet, open pool of desire. Yeah.

Turn up Mioko's microphone, please. What was that? I said she's on the wave. She's on the wave.

Have you gotten her on the wave? Yeah. You have. And she still doesn't like it.

Well, I mean, we tried it once. It just, you know, she just didn't really like it. You tried it once? I tried having sex with her once, but it didn't really like it.

Oh, that's all you've tried. Oh, I see. This is a numbers game here. You've got to try it again.

Yeah. Well, yeah. Okay. You've got to try it again, darling.

You probably have to try it for a few years. How old are you? I'm 19 years old. Okay.

Well, you know, not very many 19-year-olds are very, very good at sex. It's wonderful that you're a good cunning linguist. It's fabulous that you're a good digital maneuverer. And it's incredibly great that you're calling this show for help.

Thank you. Okay. I'm Beverly Rose. Yes.

Hi. I think you're very hot. Oh, well, thank you. Thank you so much.

Change the subject. Let's talk about me. Is it the 19-year-old? She's very hot.

She's a beautiful woman. Oh, thank you, darling. Uh-huh. Well, I'm so glad you think so.

Is your girl there a beautiful woman also? No, she isn't. Actually, I'm just going on my own. Oh, okay.

Well, you know, that might be a problem if you don't feel she's beautiful. You must feel she's beautiful if you're going downtown on her. I do. I mean, I love her.

Okay. I just think Beverly Rose is a beautiful girl. I mean... What position did you get in during the one time you did it?

Doggy. Okay. Doggy is a tough one to really give a woman pleasure. You got to know what you're doing.

Yeah. She's beautiful and she obviously likes the intimacy of sex because she likes the massage and she likes, you know... Yes.

And doggy is not the most intimate position. Yeah. You got to either get on the face-to-face. The no-boss would face-to-face.

You can, too. You know? It's the more civilized way. A little bit beyond the horses and the dogs here.

Face-to-face. Yeah. Either you on top or put her on top. Let her do the work, you know?

Right. That'll help. She'll just do what she likes. And you just have to age a little bit.

You're 19 years old. When you get to be 62 years old, you have no problems. But he wants to have fun before that. Yeah.

He doesn't want to hear that. Oh, man. Yeah. You'll be okay.

You really need to get into another position besides doggy. Because doggy, in order to stimulate her love button... You know what that is, darling? Yeah, I do.

Okay. It's a little tough to stimulate while you're doing doggy. You got to get your hand under there. She's got to get her hand under there.

You got to sit on a vibrator or something. And meanwhile, you got to keep your balance. That takes some finesse. Okay, now if you're going to talk any further,

we need a credit card number. No, Amber has one thing she wants to tell you. Amber has to say something. Okay.

If you're doing doggy style, go super slow. Super slow. Super slow. Yeah.

Okay. And see her reaction to that. If you go too fast in my irritator, if you go super slow, it will definitely turn her on.

I promise you that. She promises. Seriously. Thank you so much.

All right. Well, you're welcome. You take care. You try at some other positions.

In honor of the season, try missionary, you know? And in honor of women's rights, try woman on top, okay? Okay, darling. You take care.

You are listening to and or watching the Dr. Susan Block show. Okay. I've got Miyoko and Amber in bed with me. Dr. Suzy.

I'm going to give out the number. Okay. 213-749-1330 if you're in Los Angeles or outside North America. If you're inside North America but outside Los Angeles,

1-866-289-7068. Yes, dear brother Dave. Did you have something you wanted to tell me? Huh?

No? Yes? What? Should we do another devil?

Dr. Suzy, we have a caller on line one. Oh. And he's calling. What is his name?

His name is Joe and he's calling from Tarzana, the Ford Valley. Joe caller. And he has some issues about orgasms. Tarzana Joe.

Tarzana Joe. Okay. Tarzana Joe. Hello.

Hello. Yeah. Hi, Joe. How are you doing?

Good. So you have some issues? Yes, I have. Okay.

Speak up about orgasm. Is that right? Yes. What would you like to know?

Well, it's actually my girlfriend. Your girlfriend? Right, I've been with her for a while. Is she there?

I'm sorry? Is your girlfriend there? No, she's actually working. Oh, that's too bad.

But it's something that I've just been really curious about, a situation where a woman hasn't ever... Not one of my lovers, but yeah. Of course I know women who have not had orgasms,

usually before they've spoken to me, but yes. Yeah, it's weird. Okay, well, what I would say is put her on the phone with me, but she's not there.

No, she's not. So, you know, because an orgasm, you could help her have the orgasm, but she has to have it.

So I really need to talk to her to find out what's going on with her, darling. I will ask you one question though. Are you going downtown?

You know what? I am Susan Locke, but she doesn't like it. Okay, let's bring out the heavy artillery. Let's see, where is it?

I can't find it, but I was looking for my vibrator. Have you tried a vibrator? We bought one, but we haven't had the opportunity to use it. Oh, here it is.

You bought one, but we see that's why she's not having orgasms, because you have to do more than buy it. You have to use it. To be honest with you, we're very naive on that.

I mean, we don't even know how to use it. Some people think all you have to do is buy it, and then you'll have an orgasm. I mean, that's Madison Avenue for you.

Buy, buy, buy, and then you'll get everything you want. That's what they say. Just buy it, and then you'll be in paradise. But you see, you have to turn it on,

and then you have to put it between your legs. Oh, yeah. And you know, I would say, try it with the small one, like a pocket rocket or something like that,

but if that doesn't work, use a Hitachi magic wand, because it's about to give me an orgasm right now. Oh, yeah. It's really too much.

Yeah, it works. It works, okay? And then what you do is you put the orgasm, you put the vibrator back in the drawer,

okay, because you don't want to get her addicted to her vibrator, and get back into doing it with your fingers and penis, and then she'll want your tongue after she's had the vibrator. Really?

She'll be born again. Let me ask you a question. How long does it normally take for like the vibrator if you've no one ever...

Normal. Why do people ask me normal? Everyone wants to be normal, yeah. Okay, well, let me see.

It takes as long as it takes. Okay. That's why we like to tease. Men need to be teased because it makes you slow down,

and we women need to be teased because it makes us come around. Right. Right. And I just sometimes...

Sometimes it takes us a long time to come around, and you just take that time and you make no pressure, baby, right? No pressure. I've done everything for the block I've watched.

No, you haven't. Long time. You haven't done everything. Well, you know, yeah, I haven't done this,

but I mean, I've done practically... You haven't even gotten your vibrator out of the drawer. What do you mean you've done everything? Well, it's actually what I can do.

You know, I mean, I've tried whatever I can do. No, you can turn the vibrator on, actually. Okay. It's within your power.

Okay. And then you think out... And you also have to let her know that you are not threatened by the vibrator because a lot of women,

they hear that men feel threatened. Oh, no. We bought it together. Okay.

Yeah, but you... Yeah. We bought it together. So, I mean...

So, this is a weird... Okay, one more thing and then we have to go. Okay, so you've heard of this experience before then, right? Many times.

Okay. Multiple. Okay. You're normal, but normal isn't necessarily optimal.

And don't ever be normal. Right. Be beyond normal. Be great.

Okay. Okay, darling? Okay. Be normal.

You'll be driving a bus. I will. You know? Yes.

I will. Okay. All right, guys, we'll thank you very much. And if you sit on the engine,

you can have an orgasm. Yeah. Okay. Or a washing machine or, you know,

something else that grooves. All right. Okay, darling. Take care.

You take care. Many happy orgasms. And our number is 213-749-1330. If you're in Los Angeles or outside North America,

if you're inside North America, but outside Los Angeles, it's 1-866-289-7068. Okay.

So, there we go. And we're in bed right now, my big broadcast bed with Mioko and Amber. And Kat has disappeared.

I don't know. She's probably having sex with her boyfriend now. Yeah. That was quite some foreplay, huh?

It was, yeah. Now, are you going to give us a little demonstration? Yeah, I was going to, but I do need to pee. You need to pee?

Yeah, okay. Yeah, you can go pee. Go pee. While you're peeing,

I would like to get the clowns. I have some clowns here. Where are our clowns? Go pee.

Go pee. Mioko is going to... Unless you want to pee on Sissy May. I have a maid that loves to drink pee, but okay.

I don't know. That might be... You could have worked it into your act. Okay.

Clowns and Genevieve. Clowns and Genevieve. Where are the clowns? And Jell-O shots, please.

Okay. Oh, very good. Okay. Oh, here come the Jell-O shots.

Okay, but hang on. Where's our clowns? I need my clowns. Oh, there's Genevieve.

All right. Oh, yes. Oh, look at Holly Wood. She looks great.

Wow. Fabulous. Well, beautiful. It's been a while, Holly Wood.

Okay. And Genevieve has her own camera tonight. Okay. Here's a microphone.

We're doing... Yeah. Oh, but she looks so beautiful. I didn't know clowns were so beautiful.

This must be Dick. Chibbles. Hello, darling. Oh, I love a gentlemanly clown.

And would any of you like Jell-O shots? Okay. Here's Gene with the Jell-O shots. Now we have Pisco.

So this is Pisco Carrello in the purple. And then red and green for Christmas. We have Agarbero in the red. And that's Absinthe in the green.

That's a green. Yeah. I think the green is going to be the big hit tonight. Oh, yes.

Lobber that right down there, Genevieve. You can do it. Okay. Very nice.

Very nice. Yes. Would you like a Jell-O shot? We have Pisco in the purple.

Pisco Carrello. And we have Agarbero in the red. And we have Absinthe. Whoa!

Don't get it in your hair. You want some or you're going to just look at it? Please, please pick quickly. Thank you.

Everyone wants these green ones. It's because they look delicious. I think I'm going to have one, too. Would you feed me, please?

Somebody feed? Yes. Yeah, the green. Sure.

Oh, my God. Oh, wow. That's strong. It is.

Whoa! It is like black. Okay. That's the Pisco.

Drink it right down there, Genevieve. You are a powerful woman. Talk into the microphone, darling. Why is it the butt plugs?

It's like Christmas tree. Butt plugs. Actually, I think the Christmas tree is a butt plug for the angel. It certainly is.

Oh, my God. Did you get one, Dick? Just one. Oh, okay.

Would you like a chocolate, then? No, no chocolate? All right, Gene, I need to get these removed from my hand. Thank you, Jen.

Drink. What kind of drink did you like? Drink that up. Cherise, could I please have a Bacardi and Coke?

Specifically, Cherise. Specifically? Actually, rum, we have rum barbancourt. It's rum and coke.

And vodka with four limes and a rock. I'm with you. I'm with a Bacardi and Coke. I have sponsors, okay?

Jesus. Would you like the Chinese aphrodisiacs? Can you reach them, please? Yeah.

Talk into the microphone. Okay, I don't think Holly's microphone is working. Can we get her mic working, please? I've never been here.

You haven't been here since yesterday. I know, but you're back. I'm back right now. As beautiful as ever.

Absolutely. Although, you have a lot of blue stuff around your eyes. You've become a clown. For today.

It's like a cult. What happened to you? Yeah, pretty much. I do the same kind of thing.

It's just, I don't know. It's almost like a family, the plum porn thing. Yeah, it's a family. It is.

And can you introduce your family to me? Yeah. This sounds incestuous, this family. In a weird way.

Yeah. It's a very weird dysfunctional family. Yes, it is. Absolutely.

It's great, though. This is Daisy. Daisy. I hear her name is Daisy Mae.

Daisy, can you stand up and show us your outfit, please? Yeah. Daisy Mae, you look divine. I never saw clowns this well-dressed, actually.

These are like trashy lingerie clowns or Victoria's Secret clowns or something. Yeah, absolutely. Clowns can be hot.

Clowns can be hot. And speaking of hot, we have a man, I believe. A male clown. This is good.

We need a male. This is Dr. Dick Chibble. Dr. Dick. Dr. Dick.

Dr. Susie, darling. Dr. Dick. I am the irreverent Dr. Susan Block. So, from an irreverent to a reverend,

from a mound to a clown, you are marvelous, darling. So, show us your outfit. Give us a little masculine strut there

around in front of us here. Come on. Yeah. Pull it off.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's take something off here. We need to show that men can be sexy. It's a fashion show type.

Fashion show. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Show that chest there.

Hey, you have quite some outfit. Yeah, I know. Can I see yours? Can you get up?

Uh-huh. And there's a banana here. Is that a banana in your pocket? Or, yeah, happy to see me.

Daisy May. We got Jell-O shots. Jell-O shots. Jell-O shots.

Jell-O. Oh, very good. Agaverro. Yeah, but I made funny...

We got Jell-O shots. All right, panda clown. You just look so damn hot. Hello, darling.

Okay. So, clowns, are you ready to watch a striptease? I would love to. Yeah, sit back a little, please.

Sit back. You can lean up against the political dickheads here. Okay, let's all get cozy here. You mind if I stroke your leg?

Stroke me. All right. And I see Miyoko has come back from the restroom. And I think she's talking...

Is this your lap dance guy? No, do you have one? Or do you just want to dance for us? I can't hear you.

She wants to dance for the clowns. Oh, okay. Perfect. We have clowns here.

You wanted to dance for clowns? We didn't even know. It's a coincidence we happen to have clowns. Okay.

Send in... You like to blow? Go ahead. That's your job now.

In case you were wondering who the lovely new brunette is, it's our favorite blonde in disguise. She knows that the bushes are spying. Oh, yeah.

Clown porn the movie. Clown porn the movie. All right. Very good.

Is this you? No. Oh, but this is Dr. Dick. Dr. Dick, talk to the microphone.

Oh, you're in this, Holly. I'm in it. No, all right. Clown porn.

Oh, fantastic. This is great. I love it. All right.

Well, we'll get more into the meaning of clown porn in just a moment, but we're going to have a little striptease from... Like Susie? Mioko.

Yes. Yes, Scott. I heard someone... I heard Scott say Dr. Susie, and then nothing.

Just Dr. Susie. Okay. This is... Would you like a Chinese aphrodisiac?

You did. Okay. I've got to have it bit by bit. You know, I tried having that absent jello shot all in one mouthful,

and then I tried to discreetly, you know. Okay, you got a call? Yeah. Would you like to take a call?

I guess so. I guess Mioko's getting ready anyway. So we're going to take a call, Clowns. Okay.

You have Mike from San Diego. Okay. San Diego. We've got somebody from out of town.

So we're going to patch them through to you, Susie. All right. Go ahead. All right.

Okay. Let's talk to Mike. Hi, Mike. Hi.

Hi. What's going on? Pretty good. Good.

Pretty good is going on. Yeah. Yeah. What's on your mind?

I'm trying to get my girl. She hasn't been giving me the effects I deserve. I take her out on dates. I bring her flowers.

How old are you? 21. 21. How old is she?

Like, 20, I think. 20? Well, you know, you guys are kind of young. How long have you been, you know,

applying her with gifts and dinner? We've been dating for like two years. Two years? And have you said to her that you would like to go higher?

Have you said to her you'd like to make love? Yeah. But like, she just doesn't seem to get in the mood. Doesn't get in the mood?

Yeah. Okay. What do you do? What have you done so far?

You must have done some kissing? Yeah. Okay. And going downtown?

Yes. Okay. So you've had oral sex? Yes.

So maybe she's worried about getting pregnant? Yeah. Or maybe she wants more of a commitment? Maybe she wants, ask her what she wants.

Yeah, I do. Like, well, one night we were going to have sex at the same night. I took her home. Pretty sure.

That's what a lot of guys think. Yeah. Wishful thinking. And she was going, she went into the bathroom and freshened up.

Yeah. And I quickly lit some candles, got some champagne out. And she left. Ooh, that sneaky little bitch.

She left. Yeah, she left. That's sneaky. That's not even saying, honey, I'm not ready yet.

That's just sneaky and scared. You're scaring her, babe. Oh. I guess.

Yes. That's scared. Either that or she's just... Yeah, she might be a bitch, I don't know.

Maybe she's got another guy. Forget him. Ooh, I'm mean, aren't I? Or maybe she didn't get good oral sex.

Oh, now, did she come from the oral sex? Yeah, she did. She did, okay. Oh, okay.

After she did, like, I made her bleed a ton of a bit. You made her what? I made her bleed. Bleed?

Yeah. Yeah, there's a problem there. You made her bleed from oral sex? Maybe she was just under period.

What are we doing? Okay, I was like... No teeth during oral sex. No teeth.

Wait, wait. Was this from biting or from menstruation? Biting. Biting.

I wouldn't have sex with you either. All right, we're kicking you out of bed. What do you mean, you bit her hard enough for her to bleed? You don't bite.

No, that's not good. That's sick and wrong, and even Dick Chibbles is upset. Okay, we're all upset with you for that. You're young and maybe you can learn.

Tongue, no teeth. When you get even a piercing down there, it like stays for four days because of the salt contents of your urine. Don't bite down there.

That's wrong. Come on, now you know better than that, and if you don't, you should know. How would you like a girl to use teeth on you?

All right, so that's our advice. No more teeth. You've lost this one, I mean, you know. But the next one, no more teeth, okay?

Okay. Okay. And I got almost things to say. No, you don't, because we're moving on.

But you can call next time. Okay. Love ya. Okay, no more teeth.

I mean, when you're advanced, you can do a little nibbling. Very light nibble, nibble, nibble, nibble, nibble. I move it up to the shoulders for the nibbles. Yeah, well, you know, but you can actually,

a little nibbling on the clip, I think is good. I think it can work, but at this age, at this stage, no, just hold the teeth inside your lips, baby. Come on, and he's wondering.

And enough for her to bleed. I know. Of course she said she came. Yeah, she said, like, please stop it.

Just get away. Yeah, I came, sure. But you know, we appreciate your calling, Guy, because after all, you are trying to learn.

That's the thing. And who knows how many guys are out there that have been biting from age 21 to 61, and they never got to learn not to do that.

All right, so our number is 21374913. 30 of you in Los Angeles or outside North America if you're inside North America, but outside Los Angeles, 1-866-289-7068.

Happy holidays. I'm in bed with the clowns, including Holly Wood is back with us. And Miss...

Oh, you missed us? Oh, that's so nice. I'm Genevieve. Oh, I'm Genevieve, of course.

And we still miss Genevieve because Genevieve, the one we know, is a blonde, and this is a sultry brunette. This is the bad version.

The bad Genevieve. This is the contortionist version. Right, what could be the bad version? The bad version is the one

that I was trying to show you pictures of. The contortionist. Mmm, oh, mmm. That's really good.

So there's Genevieve, and there's Daisy Mae blowing bubbles. Do you have the bubbles, baby? Give us some bubbles.

They were helping me blow bubbles. Oh, okay, we have help. Very good. You have to talk in the microphone, darling.

And Dick chibbles the male clown. All right, so I believe we are ready. Is that right? And there's Mistress Crystal.

Mistress Crystal, you come out here. Come sit over here if there's room. There's no room? Okay.

Okay. Well, we have to see her outfit at some point. Well, here, let's all move over just a little bit. Come on this way.

Come on this way. Yeah, move over. Weird stuff. Here, come here.

Come this way. This way, this way. And here's Mistress Crystal. Looking fabuloso in her see-through outfit.

Here comes... Can you get over there? We're just moving over, making room. Sit on the dildos.

Make room here. You can sit back against Dick here, Dick Cheney. Here, just sit between his balls. That's good.

Okay, we'll give one of them... Okay, the microphones. Get the microphones working, please. Oh, we have Santa Elf here.

Hello, JJ. Little Santa Elf, come over here, JJ. You look so cute. Thank you.

Oh, that's so cute. Thank you, JJ. Okay, can you come sit over here? I don't know.

Mistress Crystal. Okay. Right row, back row. Okay.

If we caddy it. Okay. We can caddy it. Okay, there you go.

Yeah, people can be on different rows. All right. We are ready. Okay, JJ, you can sit right down there.

Just sit there. Okay. Now, we are ready for Miyoko. You might remember her from Playboy.

Now she's cutting the books. You might remember her from Playboy. Hey, Colonel, please. Our house to your house.

We love you. We care about you. All right, we're ready for Miyoko. Author of practical striptease,

not the impractical kind. And she's here somewhere. Where is she? My goodness, Charles.

Where's Miyoko? Does anybody have any idea where she is? That's a lot of dedication. Well, maybe we don't have Miyoko.

Does someone know where Miyoko is? Has she... Miyoko, please. Anyone have any idea?

Is there a Miyoko in the house? Okay. No Miyoko. All right.

Well... Hey, Sissy, come here. Oh, Sissy. Sissy's all opened up tonight.

Very nice. We'll be. Well, we got one. Oh, there we go.

Well, while we're waiting for Miyoko, somebody should go find Miyoko or let me know. Yeah, Miyoko.

We don't want to show. You don't want to get splashed. We do want to show. We don't want to get splashed.

Miyoko. Uh-oh. Oh, wow. Inflation.

Oh, my goodness. We got pop. Oh, yeah. Keep your head down.

That'll get you drunk sick. Miyoko's gone. Oh, yeah. Oh, take it.

Oh, my gosh. This is what you call product placement. I guess so. Oh, you're going to shake it up now.

You never know where the product is going to be put. Whoa. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Let's move the child here. This is places that we all have to step and possibly sit. Okay, okay.

Can we have a towel? Can we have a towel? Very important. Okay.

I'll get a towel. Towel right away behind here. Somebody get a towel from behind here now. Right now.

Right now. Get the towel right away. Okay. Please.

We have a towel. Okay. And hold the towel under her. Howard, you never had product placement

like this, did you? Welcome to the underground. Welcome to our house. All right.

All right. So how are you doing there, Sissy? Do you need to expel anything? Okay.

Talk into the microphones, ladies. Please. Okay. All right.

Sounds. Okay. We said back in alien. So we have back in alien now.

All right, Sissy. That's very good. Now you're back as well. I'm going to go right to the camera, please.

I don't see any complaining. Just get right over there. Very good. Be ready for anything.

You can start to tingle. And they get really warm. Well, you really wanted to do that, Mr. Genevieve.

Oh, I don't know. Yes. You all applauded this. No, talk into the microphone.

Here. Do we have the microphones working, please? We actually did that earlier in the restroom this evening before the show started.

Yes. And then we decided that we would do it on other people. Okay. So you did that to each other first.

Actually, we did it to ourselves. We hadn't seen each other in a year. So when you haven't seen each other for a while. We have us on the floor next to each other.

Give each other a champagne enema. That's a great way to renew old acquaintances, you know? Friendship renewed. Through a champagne enema.

All right. Can we move this? This is all stained now. Please.

Okay. Don't just put it on the bed there. Okay. I need somebody to get the towel away.

Because it's kind of full of stuff. Okay. All right. Because now I'd like to have, what would I like to have?

How about a clown strip tease? Oh, I can't take all this off. I can show my boobs. Okay.

Well, you can do a clown strip. Susie? Yes. Susie, where are the microphones?

All right. They're talking. Okay. They're not working.

Okay. There's three of them. Hello. Okay.

Here we go. That one is. So, Upsy Daisy. Is this one working?

Okay. And now, yes. Okay. We found the microphones.

Susie, we need the microphones. Yeah. Well, the microphones are here. They're here.

Have they leaned back? I've got to find them. We're good. I have extreme sound in my headset.

I can't hear it. Turn. Can you find the microphones, please? Look for the microphones.

All right. Hollywood. Okay. Lean back.

From Hollywood, California. From your house to our house. Yeah, we're tied up. Whoa.

We came tied up tonight. Well, this wasn't much of a tease. We got heat. Yeah, yeah.

Take the picture. We got technology. The military gave it to us. And now you lost it.

Oh, no, no, no. That's for sure. Fighting machines that shoot no weapons. From my lips to your lips.

We're everywhere. It's nowhere. We're in your house. We got you.

We don't drop no bombs. We shoot sperm. We squirt. And throughout the world,

the revolution is in our bellies. The revolution is in our pussies. It's in our cocks. The revolution is between our titties.

And we can be yellow. We can be green. We can be gray. But can you imagine a world?

A world where we have globalization, but you can't come to my house. And I can't come to your house. Hollywood can come to my house.

Because democracy has become terrorism. Beautiful. Because democracy keeps us from crossing borders. And remember in the old days when the kings

were like fascists. We moved from country to country. We had no passports. Passports to court.

But we had no passports. Let's hear it for Hollywood. From Hollywood, California. We have Hollywood.

Down here, darling. From my house to your house. We got a revolution like nobody's ever seen before. And I believe we have an angel in the house.

Her name is Amber. Amber. Amber. Amber, would you dance for us?

We have a... Amber, dance for us. Dance. I believe so.

You do it. And we have to stop the killing when a government kills a man or a woman. We've got terrorism.

Right, dad? That's my father over there. That's called government sponsored terrorism. It taught me everything.

And when a man is killed by government or an animal is killed by government. Sit down here. We've got terrorism.

No, DJ. Juicy Jay, just sit here for her. And when in a free global economy we are not able to travel.

When a free global economy we cannot travel. When we have prisoners, then we have no freedom. When we talk about free trade and people can't cross borders,

we have terrorism. Put your knees down so you're beautiful. When we talk about freedom. Freedom.

When we talk about freedom and we can't cross the border, we've got nothing. Let our women come. Let freedom ring.

George, don't you be tapping my fucking telephone. That ain't freedom. Knees down. We don't like visa. It's called fascism.

It's called death. Versus life. Hey George, you went to China. What happened?

You owe them a lot of fucking money. And George, you won't even ride a horse. Because you're afraid of horses. Maybe because they have bigger necks than you do.

You ride a little puny motorcycle, don't you? Hey Amber, you get a prize if you strip. And George, George, if you want to teach democracy given the weapons, not the weapons are missed

but the weapons are to shine in the eyes of our children. And let us travel freely. And so what if 3,000 people die and then we kill 100,000 people?

That's what Hitler did. He killed a few more. But we're on our way. And freedom is in our eyes.

It's in our quach. Because humanity's been spreading all over the world when the sailing ships were sailing. Home, home, home.

And humanity is our... it's our women. It's the beauty of the world. We like the guys too.

It's everything we have. And no matter whether we're green, yellow, purple when I was a little boy, when I was a little boy they told me that we had to watch out

because the Chinese were going to invade California. They've invaded the Walmart. They've invaded what? Nobody told me they were coming in at LAX.

You guys are jokers. You guys are full of shit. I think that would be... And the revolution is here

because people are loving each other from all over the world and trying to live together. And weapons will not change people.

It will only like hitting a tomato. The seeds of terrorism will spread everywhere. And if we kill one terrorist, we kill whole generations.

Amber darling. Are you done? Are you doing more? Do you strip more?

Can you take off your top? See the clap sign. Take off your top. Everybody clap.

Top, top, top. Hop, hop, hop. Ho, ho, ho. Top, top, top, top, top, top, top, top, top, top, top, top.

Hey, there's no clap sign. Top, top. Beautiful Christmas ornaments. You get a nice view.

You have to give one to the cheapsie people here. Oh, yeah. You gotta watch out in the democracy. Beautiful.

And democracy... Wow. There's no democracy unless we have a hundred parties. Yeah.

And we take control of our lives. Tell her you want her to turn around. The democracy with big parties, the Democrats and the Republicans are both the same people.

And socialism and communism. Amen and amen. But in words, right? Give it back.

And you know when Mother Earth gets mad, you know what she's going to do? You're like any mother. Oh, yeah, baby.

She says, get the fuck out of here, kid. Amber. Let's hear it for Amber. And all the Katrina.

Sister Amber. Dancer. Angel. Elephant.

And we look at the road and we look at the beauty. And it's our eyes and our noses. Oh, yeah. And our tits.

And our tits. Hey, don't forget tits. Hey, Kim, take your top off. Yeah, that part, yeah.

That's good. Yes. My goodness. Look at this.

Yeah, give it to the photographers, baby. Turn around. Oh, yes. Beautiful.

And we're all beautiful. Yes. Happy Kwanzaa. Mary Hanukkah.

Mary triple X mess. Yeah, that's good. For now. Happy Saturday.

And we've got DJ Wiggins. Dark DJ. We've got Beauty of the World. We've got eyes that we can't resist.

We've got tits that are so great. It gets so good. Okay, let's hear it for Sister Amber. Sister Amber gets a prize.

And you two get a prize, Hollywood. You haven't shown enough yet. We've got a revolution. We've got a revolution.

Do a little dance. It didn't show hers. But you get a prize. Show them.

Get a prize. All the lovely women. Mistress Crystal. Whoa, beautiful.

We've got revolution everywhere. Mistress Crystal. You look around you. You see it.

Stand up for us, Mistress Crystal. You feel it. Show it off, baby. Show it off, darling.

Stand up for us. It's Park and Alley of Time. Saturn Alley is the original holiday of Winter Solstice. No, I got him, baby.

And that was a little quick. All right, you get a prize. And Daisy May. And it's not a foul.

Give us a little dance. You get a prize. Dance with the snake. What?

Oh, yeah. Watch his hand. Her, okay. This is Evee.

All right, Daisy May, come forward. Take your prize. You can still dance around. That's very good.

Keep doing that. We like it. Keep doing what you're doing. How y'all doing?

You're doing all right. It's all right, right? It's the only revolution we got going. Daisy May.

That reminds me of Ellie May from the Beverly Hill Village. Oh, Daisy May, you're beautiful. Show it off, baby. And from Los Angeles, California.

From my house to your house. From my world to your world. You like your prize. I'm glad.

Daisy May. Take it off. Take it off. Wow.

Whoa. My goodness. You can drop bombs on us and we're going to squirt on you. Oh, yeah, baby.

We're going to squirt all over you. Can't we just like... We want you to know that we are the patriots. We are the Americans.

All right, Dick. We need some guys. You stay up there. Get his shirt off.

Come on. We need male energy. We need male... Okay, and Daisy May, here's your prize.

It'll be a bloody war. Stay up there. Hang on to her prize. And Mr. St. Genevieve, you get a prize.

And if you look at our revolution as individuals closely, it is our women. All right. These are the women.

Hey, I think we got something for the guys, too, here. I mean, it's our men. Let's hear it for our men. Beautiful.

Let's hear it for our men. Let's hear it for the boys. Let's hear it for the test guys, too. My goodness.

Yeah, baby. We don't care if you've got a clown face. And what about our dicks? And what about our dicks?

Let's talk about our dicks. Let's talk about dicks now. Yeah, really. Some of us are dickheads.

Let's talk about exploiting our dicks and to be used rather than sit in pants all day. Let's talk about shooting the gun between our legs and not the bombs that destroy.

Let's talk about shooting the guns of life, darling. Procreation and recreation. And let's hear it for dick chibbles. That was short, though.

Come on, come on. That was great. Come on. No, no, no.

We need more. One more time. One more. A little more.

A little more. One more time. Please. Let's say ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.

Can you come up here? Just be our God and goddess. Just be our God and goddess right up here. Or maybe Holly.

You can help her. Or you want two? You want two girls? Genevieve got a prize and didn't show her tits.

We have a complaint. Wait. OK, OK. Okay, Holly is complaining that Genevieve got a prize.

And did not show her books. All right, you're right. We have to be fair. Okay, Genevieve.

Because we are insurgents and it works. Technology. Please Genevieve, please Genevieve. Paper matches.

Paper matches. Oh, we need to have some holiday fire. We got paper matches. Our attorney has everything we need.

John Burton, when you need a good civil liberties attorney, give him a call. Or if you need matches. Do you do 2257 work?

Here's Genevieve. Okay, you can do it girl. Split those matches, right? In case you're wondering, we are going to light your fire.

We're gonna light your fire, baby. Take them out. Fascism is when we live in a global economy where nobody can move.

You are Mexican, you stay in Mexico. Well, wait a minute, it's our fucking country. What are you talking about? Okay, we've got matches.

You took us out with some cannons. But you know what we got? What do we got? We got big bellies that say Viva La Raza.

That's right, big bellies. We're gonna take you out with them. Forget the Alamo, Viva La Raza. Okay, I couldn't hear that.

I think I have to take my headphones off. She's on her way. Yes. Do you not have a voice, Miss Anna?

Mistress Crystal, tell me that you don't have a voice, or do you not have a voice? No, my jaw's where it's at. Oh, your jaw.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, I know how that is. I mean, I really don't. All right.

And it's really all about technology, going to your house, getting to your house across the world, getting to your house, coming into your house.

All right, now, we have Mistress Genevieve who's about to light her tits on fire. You've not seen this before. I think we...

Can you pay me a little money for the revolution? It is, it's very good. It's very good. Because all revolutions cost money.

And our women, they cost money. Yeah, you've got to get them hard. And our guys, they've got all kinds of big dreams, and they've got a lot of money.

Here, actually, can you come sit over here, Genevieve? You know, come on over here. In the end. Come sit between us, right here.

Okay, move over a little bit. Well, we need to just... Move over, move over. ...the home at night with someone that we love

and care about. Please. We need to have the freedom to be ourselves. Okay.

We need to love. We need to care. Okay, yeah, put a little ice on it. Because if we don't,

there is the great, great mother that we never talk about. Finishing works well, too. We're just starting to talk about her.

The great, great mother who feeds us. Do you need a tongue? We have an offering of a tongue. And we're raping her every day and every day and every day.

And then... Okay. We're out of here. And everybody look up when she lights.

This is like... We're out of here. Celebrate! And it's the Romans.

We're out of here. Happy Saturday, Miss! Woo! Hey, you all fucking kid.

You've been sucking on my dick too long. Very good. Let's hear it for Mistress Genevieve of the Flaming Tits.

And then we're dead, like all... Beautiful. That's so wonderful. You already got your prize.

We don't want to do that. That was awesome. Did you get a shot of that? You got a good shot?

All right. Everybody got a good shot? Are we ready for some shots of Pisco? Or...

It is so steep yesterday. Happy triple X-mas. It's time to get up off the bed. And Dark DJ Adam Wiggins is going to emanate.

So this is hard to believe. Dark trends sound. They were having sex with mannequins. And then we're going to dance.

Yeah. And you know what was terrible for us? They didn't arrest the mannequins. Now we're going to have a five Mistress Genevieve.

I know it's scary. I've done it. But it works as long as you don't, you know, stick your tongue inside your mouth.

Flame starting to burn your tongue. Drink. So you can grab some jelly. Plomacy is us.

Plomacy is not them. They said just create an enemy and the people will follow you. We are not fascists.

We're not the enemy. We're your friends. Take off your blankets. Let's see your pussies.

Come on over here. Big manly man. Or at least let us get under there. Plomacy of the government,

which is the fascist government all over the world. But the diplomacy of the people that want to wander the world

and have sex with all kinds of people. That's the diplomacy of the future. Oh, here we go.

Come on. That's the diplomacy we have. And that's the diplomacy that has been. Yeah, yeah.

You come in this seat. You come here. We're going to break the border. To break the border.

Okay. To move from border to border so that we can f**k and love and raise families

and have responsibility. Fascism is a global economy where it says you can send your products but stay at your own f**king country, asshole.

And that kind of diplomacy won't work. It's over. We planted the seeds all over the world. We planted the seeds stronger.

And they're growing powerful and it doesn't matter who we are, we are human beings. It doesn't matter if we're illegitimate. Look at World War II. Look at World War I.

We are the children of sex. We're not the children of Jesus Christ. We're not the children of the Virgin Mary. We are the children of one night, one second, where we fought, but we loved.

And where's Amber? One picture with Amber and Jesus. This Virgin Mary shit. We need another man.

Not that you're not man enough for all of us. We are the children of sex. Here, get in the middle. We are the children of sex.

Don't obscure the tits. No, no, no. Don't obscure the tits here. We could be illegitimate children. Children of rape.

We could be children of one minute of death. All around, please. We are the children, fuck you all. Come on, Amber.

There you go. Don't call me name. We are the children of sex, and we are not the children of the Virgin Mary, but Jesus Christ, or any of that, but we are the children of a dick or something. And who's that beautiful girl?

We are the children of God, but mostly we are the children of sex. Children of sex. Each one of us is our own God of Goddess. I'll give you a prize.

We are the children of the insurgents enough. I'm very helpful. And we're everywhere, on every website, everywhere. Make it hard for me. I love it.

Especially on gcj.com. Help me here. It's going to grow. It's going to get bigger. Yeah, right.

I need help. What's your name? Martha. Martha, you are gorgeous.

Martha. Yes, here we go. Sister Martha. You're so powerful.

From our house to your house. It burns you up. Don't trip everywhere. Well, you get a prize.

And you get a prize. I didn't give you a prize. You got to be powerful. Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait.

There's not missiles. There's missiles. Martha, you are beautiful. Martha, you are born again.

We cross all borders. We cross everything. You ain't got the power and all the brightly tanks in the world.

Across town. And we're going to get you. And look at the fortune of the military. It's time to dance.

No, no, no. George, you can't move. Buddy starts. Go crazy.

And we will lose savages in the old days. We used to use it to heal us. It's been only medicine. We got technology.

I'm all over the half. I knew everyone. We're all fucking. So we're going to integrate.

So we're going to make more decisions. And we're going to dance. We're going to dance. It's the beginning.

Jake, we're going to dance. I didn't know if you were a women bad boy. Actually, you're so beautiful.

It's this scene in the film. Don't pray before. But now, it's really beautiful. And we're not even really our sponsors.

Although we do sell them on the shopping heaven. And we're waiting. David,

David, I'm about to walk around and give this mic to somebody. We've got the music of the heavens. Life is good. Life is good.

Resist violence. Resist bombing. Just send them some emails. Send them a lot of emails.

Bombing with emails every day. Who are the people? We are the Patriots. If you don't think we're the Patriots,

you're fucked. Take our children home. Take the children home. Take all our children home.

Take them home. Why would you like to be first? Would you be first? Just part anyway.

There's as much as you want. The more safe is California, the better we get. The longer the country,

we have to cross the border. The longer the country, we have to go at the border. Stay apart because the next two years

we're going to make a revolution. We're going to start. It's comic. You're not your version but new

while you spend time. Don't! Don't! Don't!

Okay, don't spend your time. Chase the CD. We got sex. I think we have a bunch of cis kids come on everybody get up get up get up okay I'm

Inside I am very shy The planes are fine big vibrations I give it up Surrender surrender all right surrender monkey when you have to shoot

You know it's a holiday I'm good. I'm kissing all the girls. Oh, yeah, thank you. Thank you Okay Thank you

Oh, thank you. Oh, thank you come to ariestay This horse has got big cocks, and you've got a little Out of my arm Oh

Get down Oh