A Midwinter Night’s Sex Comedy

Full transcript of A Midwinter Night’s Sex Comedy on The Dr. Susan Block Show:

You need to talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else? You can talk to us. I'm Dr. Susan Block, your mistress of the airwaves, but my day job is director of the Dr. Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts and Sciences, specializing in sex therapy over the phone.

Any time you need to talk, whether you need serious psychotherapy or a hot phone sex experience or a combination, my world-renowned telephone sex therapists are just a phone call away. Totally private, absolutely confidential. We listen, talk with you, advise you, role play for you, fantasize with you, no fantasy is too taboo, and

help you with anything from impotence to exhibitionism, fears to desires, fetishes to marriages. For more information call us at 213 291 9497. That's 213 291 9497 anytime you need to talk. You're listening to Radio Susie One on the World Wide Web, and now here she is, Dr. Susan Block.

Artists and exhibitionist voyeurs and connoisseurs, comedians and porn stars, husbands and wives, all you children of sex. Just like the bonobos, every other mammal, most reptiles in that, and certainly all the birds. Sex is what brings us into the world, and sex is what motivates us to stick around for a while.

Brothers and sisters, and just in case you don't know, this, with a capital X, can I hear an amen? I knew you were out there. Can I hear an A? Women. And welcome to Pussy Talk on the Dr. Susan Block show. Welcome to my room room, baby.

Where it's warm inside, oh baby, and yeah, it's winter right now if you're listening to me live. Midwinter, to be exact, tonight's show is a bit of a midwinter night's sex comedy. Oh, it's funny. Well, yeah, it's kind of funny. Because sex is a comedy, not a tragedy. I wish I'd said that.

Oh, I didn't mean to hit my pussy here. Although sometimes that's fun. Tap, tap, tap, tap, finger, finger, finger, rub, rub, rub. Yes, I wish I'd said sex is a comedy, not a tragedy. But I actually got it from Professor Camille Palia, who I don't agree with about everything.

But yes, I do certainly feel that for the most part, I mean sex can be a tragedy and an atrocity. Like say what happened in Cologne, that's an atrocity. I guess that abortion murders and mayhem like that, you know, killing of abortion providers, that's an atrocity related to sex.

Well, I guess overpopulation is a big problem related to sex. But even with all that procreation, brothers and sisters, still, for us humans, as well as for the bonobos, sex, it's mainly about recreation. And relationships, and it's mainly kind of funny, I mean, in different ways.

It's, you know, mainly pleasure, mainly silly because of all of our hypocrisy and pretense and shame. Oh yes, indeed, brothers and sisters, shame is really funny. Oh wow. So, especially I guess if you're making fun of someone who likes being made fun of,

who's, you know, kind of a humiliation fetishist, that's fun. Of course, it's not so much fun if that's your husband, I guess. I don't know. Well, it depends.

Maybe it could be fun, even for the wife of a humiliation fetishist. But humiliation fetishists generally need a therapist or dominatrix or some sort of sex worker to make them laugh at themselves. I really think it's great to laugh at yourself though. And in a way, one understanding of the humiliation fetish, brothers and sisters, is that it obliterates your ego.

So that you can enjoy yourself and go bonobos. Ooh, bonobo 2016, right? That's right, Dayton Reigns. And welcome to the stage.

Thank you. You may even get into the bed. Can I get in bed with you today? Tonight.

Tonight? Tonight. Tonight is young. The night is young.

That's good. Yeah. Where do you want me? Well, I like looking at you right now.

Oh, you want me to stand up? Yeah. I just thought since we were making fun, I'd have a crucifix because, you know, I have Catholic guilt from all my naughty sex. Oh, right.

My guilt is funny, yeah. Sex guilt is funny. Mm-hmm. Let me move the director.

I'm not the director. Hello there, Dayton Reigns. Welcome to the bed. Thank you.

So Dayton Reigns is our resident porn star associate producer, the abbreviation of which I really enjoy because it's, turn around please. Oh, yes. Ass producer. Ass producer.

That is the abbreviation of the associate producer title. I like it when he's been through. I think it's, yeah, you want a book spanking? I do.

Learn the bonobo way. There you go. Learn it. Good girl.

So go bonobos in 2016. That is our mantra, our motto, our New Year's resolution and re-love ocean, which is revolution with the word love inside of it. Right, Max? We didn't invent that either.

Oh, he's out there. I was in the lounge here talking to everybody. Everybody? On the internet.

Oh. Joseph's there, real gypsy girl. You're in the bonobo lounge. I see bonobo vill lounge.

Excellent. Can you guys talk to me at 2 a.m.? I reach out to you. Do I have any non-sleepers out there?

So Joseph's there and Julian's there. Joseph's there, real gypsy girls there, Delray's there. All right. Hey, well, we're here.

Delray is asking, where did all our guests go? Where have all our guests gone? Wait, isn't there a song? I can answer that question.

Oh, OK, good. Sure, good. Go ahead. So last night was the ex-biz awards, and so, you know.

No, because usually they want to come over right after the ex-biz award. But sometimes they do. And talk about the awards they won or didn't win or whatever. They got drunk, probably, or I don't know what happened, but they're irresponsible, so.

Well, we won't talk about them. That's OK. They are new to. They're new to the business.

They are new. They are new. Oh, Susan. Yes.

The snake is getting out. Oh, I didn't know she was there and with her opening. Hi, Evee. So she's all clean, and she even smells good.

I like Evee. I know you like Evee, and Evee likes you. So Evee is here with me now, and she's my animal. Max, you're my other animal.

And Dayton, you're my other animal. We're all animals, but Evee is a special animal because she's a non-human animal. And, you know, human animals are terrific, but non-human animals are really, really wonderful. They can teach us so much about being an animal and eco-sexuality, just being, you know, releasing our inner animal.

Bonobos do, and yet, you know, we can only see bonobos in the zoo or at a primate center, perhaps. So we need to have other animals, and of course, they're still in the wild. They're kind of hard to see without them pooping on your head. But we have these other animals, like your doggies, and there are some people that are animal, you know, real.

I would say animal lovers. I mean, it used to be called an animal trainer, and in fact, the man I'm going to talk about right now was an animal trainer. And an actor. And a bonobo fan.

And he's no longer with us. His name is Dan Haggerty, and you might know him as Grizzly Adams. Do we have a Grizzly Adams photo? There he is.

Okay. And there he is out there in the wilderness. He portrayed the 19th century mountain man who made Friends with the Bears. And that's because Dan Haggerty really did make Friends with Bears, and tigers. I mean, one of the reasons they cast him is they saw him, like, lassoing a tiger or something while he was on a horse.

I don't know, something crazy. And he was just very, very good with these non-human animals. And probably a lot of the things he did would be considered very politically incorrect and not allowed on television anymore, which is probably mostly a good thing.

I think, but he loved these animals a lot. And I had the privilege of interviewing him a couple years ago at the Hollywood Show. And we talked about Bears and bonobos and how he officiated, even though he's a Christian Catholic, and studied to be a priest, he officiated at Dennis Hoff Bunny Ranch Wedding.

And he was Friends with Dennis Hoff. Now, I didn't go into how come you're Friends with Dennis Hoff, you know? But he did volunteer that he officiated at several weddings at the Bunny Ranch. I said, who the hell gets married at the Bunny Ranch?

But obviously people do. And I guess there was some people that wanted him to be the minister. And anyway, he was a delightful interview. A wonderful guy gave me a kiss on the cheek.

Oh, come on, man. Oh, come on? Oh, no, no. Max, I'm having a moment.

This is married life. I've never been married. Well, I'm just explaining this is very little. Thank you for letting me know.

That's what it is. You're having a meaningful moment. And then, you know, your husband says, oh, come on. You know, I was in the lounge here, and I had my microphone.

He was speaking out loud. He was reading and talking. Okay. Well, he's in the Bonobo Village.

Y'all better get in there if you want to watch what's going on free. I know not a lot is going on just yet. Except we're playing with Evie, me and Dayton, Reigns. Hi, Evie.

You look better. We're talking about Dan Haggerty. I mean, tonight's subject is comedy and sex. But, you know, sad to see him go.

And he was pretty funny, though, when I interviewed him. You should watch the interview. It's on YouTube. And I asked him about Bonobos.

I wasn't sure because I knew he was religious and also kind of very popular gun shows. And had just been to Dubai on some secret thing that has, I don't know, but probably had to do with the government

or something. Anyway, he just said, Bonobos... He could have been buying hookers. What did he say?

I wrote it down. He could have been. And he's a money ranch guy. Right.

All right. So he said, Bonobos hug, this was before I wrote my book. But, honestly, what he said about Bonobos is beautiful. Bonobos hug, make love, and have a good time.

So I'm a Bonobo fan. So, you know, I mean, stating the obvious. Look at the interviews on it. Beautiful.

Well, that's the visual of the interview. We actually say everything. But I'm not going to turn it on right now because we have too much to say tonight.

So y'all go to my YouTube station at doctors... What is it? YouTube.com slash Dr. Susan Block. And, you know, fish out the Dan Hagerty interview.

And I've been, you know, sort of tweeting about it endlessly anyway because I feel really bad. Because, honestly, I was thinking about him the other day. I was thinking I got to have him come over here

because I guess, yeah, I'll be honest, he was going to come over here. And then his sister got a stroke and he's a very family-oriented guy.

And so he put it off. And then cancer struck him and took him pretty fast. It's out there. So, you know, that's a tragedy.

You know, when you compare cancer and war, and, you know, sex is a comedy, not a tragedy. So, rest in peace. Or as Del Rey says, rest in pleasure.

I'm not sure what that means. It means you're kind of making out with the worms or what rest in pleasure. It means pleasure.

You've been reincarnated from the early days. Oh, is that what that means? Come back as another human and have more pleasure. Okay, rest in peace through pleasure

if you want to be real bonobo. Definitely. And I guess I'll see you soon. Love you, Dan Hagerty.

And I feel you in my heart and you're definitely all over the place here. Yeah, there you are. And, of course, you do it a shot where he looks good

and I look like shit because I got my eyes closed. But that's cool. He looks good. You don't ever look like shit.

All right. It's okay. It's our perception of ourselves. So, and I think one of the subjects tonight

is going to be self-deprecation because that is one of the, you know, primary forms of humor. But before we get funny,

I do want to get serious again, although it's going to be funny because bonobos are funny, right? A lot of one.

I think one. I love bananas. Do you want me to shove it down my throat? No.

Just bite it? No. I want you to lick it. Okay.

Can you lick it? Oh, sure. Like slowly. If someone takes them easy.

Oh, yeah. I'll take you. As much as I love you, Evee. I can't be doing all this.

Pull it down to half mass here. Okay. And there we go. Just going to pull it down a little bit.

Somebody want to take Evee? I will. I'll take her back. And yes.

Because Evee doesn't even like bananas. All she likes. But she likes my hair. Our mice.

Yeah. Yeah. She likes hair. Okay.

So here you go. So, you know, you can hold the microphone in one hand and the banana in the other. Or you can just stick the microphone between your boobs. My boobs.

So, yeah, we've got a bit of a bonobo theme going tonight. You know. Good. Good.

Don't swallow it. I won't swallow it. Okay. I won't swallow it.

Okay. It's got a last move to show. I'm not going to swallow it yet. I don't really like to swallow it, to be honest.

We're good. Good. I'm a spitter. Then we're on the same page.

Then we're in the same jungle. So, bonobos. We're going bonobos. Right.

It's 2016. If you're listening to us live. See, I broke it. Oh, see.

I told you to lick it carefully. I am really good at it. Just that's what happens when I break it. Not that good.

All right. You're going to get punished. No, that wasn't very good. That lasted like two pictures.

Okay. All right. So hold it like that. Put a little eyelash glue right there.

Okay. So anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah. Bonobos.

Bonobos have a great sense of humor, actually. They love to play practical jokes. Yeah. Because, I mean, a lot of animals laugh.

And of course, bonobos laugh. But the true sign of intelligence is when you make the jokes. Not when you just laugh at the jokes. And I had a guest on my show who was one of the directors of Champions of the Wild.

And he told me a story about how he went to visit Ponbanisha at the Bonobos Center in Iowa. And he wanted to interview her. And of course, bonobos can communicate through a computer and sign language. In fact, they know how to speak English better than...

What are you trying to do? Yeah. What's wrong with your banana? Okay.

Keep licking it. Okay. Yeah. There you go.

Hold it together. I got it. So he wanted to interview Ponbanisha on the computer. And I didn't want to do it quite yet.

She's a little like Dayton. She wanted her own way. And even though he's this big, important Hollywood director, she said, the only way I'm going to interview you is if you put on this gorilla suit.

And there was a gorilla suit that she pointed to. And she told him to put on the gorilla suit and go scare the handyman. Right? Do you remember that story, Max?

I can't hear you. I certainly do. Right. And we know how much fun it is to scare the handyman.

Right? Because the handyman is usually one scaring us. So he did that and Ponbanisha laughed and watched him scare the handyman, wearing the gorilla suit and pounding on his chest, you know,

like actually this is a bonobo. And she just loved that so much, she gave him a great interview. So that's how smart bonobos are. But yeah.

You know, common chimps are also very smart and have a good sense of humor. Differences for a common chimp. The punchline is they kill you. Well, sometimes.

Right. Right. Common chimps do kill. They do make war.

Not as much as humans, of course. Although they do seem to have more fun doing it than we do. Humans have this bonobo side that makes us feel guilty about it. But we still do it anyway.

And that's why we need to go bonobos in 2016, because things are getting out of hand. Isn't that right, Captain Max? Certainly are.

Certainly are. We live in a world of disaster. Tell us about the disaster. You are always so descriptive.

I don't have to tell you every news channel to tell you about it. Everybody has a different point of view. They don't like us. We don't like them.

And everybody's fucking fighting and killing each other. And I think that every drop of sand in the desert now has blood on it. And we have to stop that. We have to stop that.

We're going to. You know, we have to stop this killing. And we are going to be exporting the bonobo way to Puerto Rico. In a couple of weeks, Columbus invaded the island of Puerto Rico with guns and cannons.

And we are coming to Puerto Rico with books and sex and bonobos. That's right. We're very excited because our friend and the co-editor of, where's that book? Eco-sexuality, when nature inspires the arts of love, including writings by Kamala Devi and Annie Sprinkle and Beth Stevens and Charles Eisenstein.

Dr. Susan Block? Well, yes. Isn't that book? I wrote the forward.

Yay. Our night forward. Very. And also Sabine Lichtenstall, who's the head of Tamara, who was here a few months ago.

And yeah, Veronica Monet, shout out to Veronica Monet, who also had a little bit about bonobos in her beautiful eco-sexual essay. Anyway, Serena is conducting the first eco-sexuality symposium in the Caribbean. Isn't that some sexy? I love the Caribbean.

Yeah. We can just lay out topless and they love you. Well, they would love you. Coconuts with machetes.

Coconuts with machetes. And they make you juice. Bohemians do. I like the way you got some lipstick on that banana.

Right. So anyway, Serena has invited me to give the keynote speech. Yay. Yay.

The main one. The first one, which means I have to get up early in the morning. Ew. But I'm going to talk about bonobos.

And so it's going to be fun. And it's going to be at the University of Puerto Rico at Mayaguez. And it's open and free to all students at the University of Puerto Rico at Mayaguez, as well as visitors. So if you get yourself down to Puerto Rico somehow.

Or if you live there. Well, yeah. And if you live there, you can come to the talk. And I think do a lot of the other events.

There's a whole bunch of events. And so I'm also going to do a workshop in the 12 steps to releasing your inner bonobo, a different kind of 12 step program. Nice. Yes.

Yes, indeed. Because of course bonobos are the sex addicts of the animal world. I know. Not that I believe in sex addiction, but you know, it's funny, right?

It is funny. It's much funnier to be a sex addict than just someone who has, you know, a sex problem. That's not as funny. You know, in the other 12 step program, they say that you trade drug or alcohol addiction for sex addiction.

So it's very funny. Yes. Would you like a necklace? I would.

Hi Eevee. Yes. A sneaky necklace. There you go.

See you. Hi Eevee. The other kind of snake gives you a pearl necklace. You know, usually from the other direction.

Snake. And what do I give? You're a snake. Yeah.

How are you a snake? Chinese zodiacs. Oh. Very good.

It's the year of the monkey, though. Right, Max? It is. It's.

Where's your, where's your mic? Okay. It's the year of the monkey. Okay.

The year of the monkey. Chinese New Year. It's the closest to a bonobo that the Chinese get in their new years. So February.

We really got to celebrate. Yeah. February. We're going to celebrate here.

It's the Chinese New Year. We're going to have a bunch of Chinese people here. Good. Oh, good.

And we're going to have firecrackers and what else do they do in China? They make kids in China. They kill kids in China if you have too many, I think. Oh, they don't kill kids.

It's overpopulated. They don't kill kids. They just. I've heard that.

Let people get abortions really easily, which, you know, let's say three cheers from the Chinese. Or throw them in the trash. I'm not sure.

No, they don't. You know, there's a difference between a living, breathing human and a little, you know, embryo. I agree.

What is that? Is that even a person? Is it an egg? We eat embryos actually every day.

Anyone that eats eggs eats embryos. So think about that. Well, I mean, but we eat meat too. Right.

So it's fine. So, you know, but you have to draw the line at where, you know, humanity is somewhere. So that's where I do. I mean, it's got to be breathing.

Anyway. Right. Come to Puerto Rico or, you know, just come to the University of Puerto Rico and it's January 28th.

And like I said, early in the morning, so bring me coffee. Okay. All right. And let's see.

So, yeah, so we're talking about the comedy of sex. Sex is a comedy. And we have a comedian tonight. We do.

We do. And I think we're going to bring that comedian to the broadcast bed area. Is he afraid of snakes? We're going to find out.

And his name is give him a hand. Jason Hadley. Woo. Here.

Why don't you sit in between us? Yeah. There you go. Here's a mic.

All right. Thank you. Yeah. You can have that mic and then you can have that mic.

All right. Well, hello there, Jason. Why hello? Do you want to lick the banana?

I'm going to pass. I had to go out and attach it for the day. Okay, good. Is it because of how it looks or how it tastes?

You know, I'm just not a fan of the cylindrical foods. I knew it was how it looks. I know. I'll stay away from.

You like pie, though? Love pie. Pie pie pie pie pie pie pie pie. And I understand that there's a special pie.

Yes my goodness gracious. Are you like pussy pie? Oh yeah. yeah like Mrs. Smith's hair pie I mean I'm gonna get it in the in the screen it's

a puppet this is a puppet you didn't realize I never knew that no it's a it's called the wondrous vulva puppet yes the wondrous vulva puppet and the creator of it is dossi what is that no Dottie I mean anyway the company is called wondrous vulva puppets and they've been around for a long time and you

know that because yeah where did you see this vulva puppet wow okay so let's go into the wayback machine for a moment and it's I was watching an episode of the Dr. Susan clock show when I was in my pubescent years when things are just flying around in your head and your friend's dad has copies of penthouse

letters in the bathroom and you spend a lot of time using his restroom to the point where your mom takes you to the doctor because she thinks there's something wrong with you but no I was just developing sexually and curious if you will and one night I stumbled across your show and the loveliness that you

are and you had my thank you and on public access channel three between two and four you couldn't miss it yeah right and 77 also channel 77 and we of course did some HBO special mm-hmm which use the vulva puppet quite a bit so we had we you and I were having a bonding experience through the television you

had you had brought out your fine vulva'd friend here and had proceeded to demonstrate a proper cunnilingus technique oh on this yes on this very puppet and watching you explain how you see how this is how this was seared into my mind where you said to spread the hood and grab the clip with your two

fingers spread the hood and then grab the clip with the two fingers yes yes yes and then proceed to lick I think I simulated the licking it didn't actually because it's made of fabric right well stunt licking yeah exactly like that right and yes it was yeah it was quite like the opposite and my

goodness that is engorged and yes and so so I will never ever ever forget watching that it is but it's a little cylindrical see that is a cure there but yeah I never forgot it and so when I had the opportunity to join you this evening I immediately jumped on that chance and the first thing that popped into my head was

was that image from from when I was younger and I was like oh my goodness gracious this is this is gonna happen and here we are okay and I want to know if you learned oh actually Mike Mike pussy-looking game is yeah can you show me here I'll hold your mic yeah you hold the mic well one of the things I'd

like to just kind of practice with is a is to expand on your technique not only did I pinch as one normally okay there you go only when it's very wet though right correct yeah the better they say and then I proceeded to lick the letters of the alphabet that's a Sam Kenison technique but you know I'll take some

credit for transmitting it yeah just absolutely so that was where the evolution place so I saw one and then I went to the next and yeah you could really a lot of happy ladies do anything you want with your tongue but some people get so confused and they're sort of obsessive compulsive and so Sam

Kenison would say you know just lick out every letter of the alphabet and you should have her coming by the time you get to pee how you're gonna do that from the bathroom whole other story but nevertheless so can you show me your technique absolutely may I put them banana down so I can oh yes hold the

mic put it in a comfortable place because you know it could hurt who wants it Hollywood Jake thank you Hollywood Jake there there it is the banana all right so all right so you hold the mic okay so now he's doing the technique in which he puts the clitoris between his wet fingertips which are not wet now

because it's only a pussy pop it well we can just yeah okay and don't put the mic right in front of his mouth so that we can see the technique yeah it was a very elaborate scene yeah okay yeah I don't know what comes after yeah yeah yeah yeah G whiz or oh yeah okay pinch it from the top and then I might put two fingers

inside to try to work the G spawn oh yeah yeah I didn't know it's called the two finger whammer jammer but there you go I don't whammer jammer but you know you can do that if she's very wet I call it sex by Braille come hither gesture indeed absolutely come here if you don't want to hither just come here and if you

don't I will continue to do so until I just drag you along and that's the G spot that people say don't exist but I didn't feel it even in the palm of my hand there you go and as I continue to do so and then I'll go into lowercase letters and you know even Spanish upside down question marks yeah this is what my

children have learned the one no child left behind right I just relived my childhood you know that's actually no puppet that's why he's blushing this is what my therapy clients are constantly doing we're living their childhoods you so make me laugh now you've been doing that but I think we're gonna hear you do

a little routine oh actually for that I just want to mention that one of your jokes was used by the late great I have to say the late great a lot is that I guess that's cuz yeah I'm getting up so so the late great Joan Rivers she's one of your favorite she's one of my favorite I love her I think her plastic

surgery is fabulous I thought that Joan Rivers her eulogy that she wrote for herself was amazing and great and so funny and she ordered a toe tag from Tiffany's that's totally that's totally cool the plastic surgery I'm not gonna be on board with that but you know each woman should be able to do what she

wants she owned it that's one of my favorite jokes of hers was when I die I'm donating my body to Tupperware very funny about it it's true it's true I just well it's aesthetic but she did use one of your jokes absolutely and it was they were showing it if you remember from e-fashion police they would show

pictures of celebrities and various dresses and what have you made make comments on them and Joan Rivers had said of a snookie that I had written for her that the last time that she used the term baby gap was to drive this guys or describe her vagina and you know because she just had her baby and what

have you so she told it way better let me tell you that but nevertheless I had a lot of fun writing for that and that was a wonderful way you say baby gap yeah my baby gap no but I know you know maybe you have to do it with a vulva puppet and say my baby gap anyway but you know beyond that you know I know the theme of

the show is sex and comedy and do you think sex is a comedy absolutely I think some of the best sex is sex that incites laughter right you know like accidents yeah a lot of sports injuries you know I mean as you can tell by my adonis like physique you know that I oftentimes get a little winded which is

fine you know so and with that comes some complications and so I couldn't afford like Viagra or Cialis so I thought I'd drink a cap full of miracle growth after I got out of the hospital my girlfriend was like you know your dick doesn't look any bigger but bushes out of control I'm happy to be sitting here

next to a porn star thank you I love you love what's your favorite kind of porn the kind that I'm watching the kind that I'm gonna go back to after I'm done here no no actually I mean is it vanilla is it oh no it is Neapolitan all the way doesn't mean color it means actions all about Rocky Road Pecan

Praline whatever no no no vanilla in my world but yeah no I like some of the porn I like is like kind of a challenge to masturbate to you know like like like for instance one time I stumbled across pregnant lesbian porn I know who was in that no no that's that's pretty hot yeah yeah it's really hot because they're

eating for two now so one of the way are you serious or is that just a joke no that's for real that's for real yeah they didn't 69 they 138 anyone was it a famous yeah well I've seen a Bella Donna it's on the list it's on the list it's a pregnant yeah every time she gets pregnant she continually works which is

weird cuz she only works like nine months out of the year now there's a market for lesbian element is interesting yeah oh yeah without a doubt no and was it like eight months like yeah like ready to pop wow yeah yeah and just no holds barred I mean I've seen pregnant gang bangs it's like you know I mean just the stuff

that's out there I just imagine it's so pregnant is in two of the things you mentioned well it is well it happens to be one I don't I think there's something beautiful about that yeah for pregnant maybe so I think gang bang well remember it's just me watching it's not like I'm there in the room it might be

a much different story I might have I might have a crisis of conscience at that moment had sex with a pregnant woman not yet my girlfriend may be the net they'd be the first girlfriend is she here no no she's she's doing she's working tonight unfortunately she's working yeah absolutely a complete and total trust yeah

yeah are you monogamous well let me just say that as much as I enjoy the bonobo way and I have in my world at this moment in time I feel like kind of going the penguin way you know you know they made friends actually do they make your life I think that's a myth they made for a season and and bonobos you know

there's lots to the bonobo way it's it's not just about being non-monogamous it's it's about releasing your inner bonobo going bonobos in bed perhaps with one person I do like that they're the only species that besides humans that facing each other there you go now that's difficult if it's you and a

pregnant woman challenge accepted challenge right what's your favorite position I love actually I love missionary because I just like to see the look of satisfaction if I'm doing my job correctly I need that validation issues yeah but no one then you could still see her yeah well I'm not I don't mind reverse

oh that's the best one please please make us do that shall we and then we have to talk about the ass because that's a theme tonight go on okay reverse cowgirl is not fun at home this is a technique men we do for you because it's visually stimulating we don't want to do that at home well actually

I don't call on that on my sex calls you like it you might have even tuned in I'm not one that you regularly I don't want to do squats when I'm having sex really you know I mean it's it's it's been fun I mean in in my younger years it yeah it is more of an exercise you think well I'm a partner I'm a full

participant here I mean I'll I'll support from the bottom during the squad a lot of work yeah no but I get a great bicep workout out of it you know yeah without a doubt it's you know you doesn't have to be a lot of you lay back well that's one thing if they're doing all the work but you know

traditional porno reverse cowgirl is horrendous oh Lee that's a fail if you want to have comfortable reverse cowgirl late tune into my sex calls channel and I give a detailed description of it but ass yeah those by the way are all all clips and calls from way back when from Jason's day yeah yeah these are the

shows that Jason got off on you'll see the vulva puppet a different snake actually and is it a spitting snake yeah I mean you we have to cut the dildos from YouTube we have to censor them yeah because then no dildos on you to look too much like a snake I guess right yeah so they cut that but ass I'm trying to

get back to the theme because right the theme is a midwinter's night sex comedy which is a play on Shakespeare's a midsummer night's dream right and you know what happens in that play you know I don't I'm not up on my Shakespeare unfortunately your Shakespeare is that anything by David Lorde's beautiful

fairy princess just like Dayton and like green like this and sparkly her names Titania and and her husband who's the king is kind of upset with her for various sexual reasons you know and so he puts a spell on her and he puts a spell on this kind of you could say asinine young handyman which turns him

into an ass with ears and everything okay and well an ass and then of course Titania falls in love with the ass it's a kind of beauty and the beast yeah okay there you go wow and it was considered the porn of Elizabethan times because they were you know kind of she's in in nesting and making all kinds of sexual

moves with this ass right who knew hundreds of years later until you want a huge moneymaker hey I didn't go there yeah well anyway brothers and sisters this is a midsummer night's sex comedy a midwinter night's sex comedy that is featuring the ass of Dayton Reigns and all my glitter and all her glitter and the

comedy of Jason Hadley and I want to give a shout out to Joe Williamson who kind of connected us together Roberto Bonobo also help put this he's another ass producer this ass thing is yeah now speaking of ass and boobs and are you going to partake in Bonoboville communion I actually I'm not familiar with Bonoboville communion so

let's what what it was what does that entail speaking of ass this entail it mm-hmm possibly Dayton's tail okay or possibly her boobs yeah yeah because you have lovely no no we're actually halfway through the show oh yeah yeah we've been doing great we have fair enough duct tape fixes everything so just

your girlfriend is it okay that she takes her and is it okay if you take communion off of her body or is that considered not okay you know what that's sexual yeah I'm just gonna say I mean you know it's business this is a religious event is what this is I mean who's gonna you know what religion were

you brought up I was brought up Jewish so I'm gonna be feeling guilty about this for hours afterwards okay rest assured well you know there's a lot of prayers bro at least you don't have to confess like the Catholic is the prayer over the wine and now Dayton happened to grow up Catholic yeah and she of course is the

altar girl here in this case and and so you know we have the body of the Lord or the lady you know and and then we have the drink which would be I guess you could say the blood although that sounds a little creepy not for me but okay okay are you kind of good a golf guy or do you drink blood I've been known to maybe suck

on a wound okay well personal pleasure but you're right you are a bit of a Neapolitan would you we have two different drinks we're so excited that Agua Cocoa leaf liquor has provided us with a shipment and a lot of these lovely leaves I think we should get them late and make it I don't think Rhonda Jeremy

would be appropriate for this tonight maybe do you well I can like to give a choice okay I say I've had Rhonda Jeremy and you like oh yeah you want me to pour you want Ron down your throat okay yeah I'm gonna pour Ron down your throat it's symbolic so to pour some wrong and of course Ron Jeremy himself is the

mayor of the Noboville no yeah and he won an award we give out our own awards here at the Dr. Susan block show these are Susie awards and Ron won for his harmonica playing actually won a musical award. Really? Harmonica? Yeah. Oh yeah. No skin flu. No dangling facts. No. Well he's won for that before. No he plays the harmonica he also plays the piano Ron is not just a pianist he's a pianist so all

right so body part left shoulder yeah okay how about you know what Dr. Susan blocks choice I'm on I'm in your house I'm in your house no actually well I guess then the ass because it's all right it's ass all right I'm Johnny Knoxville and this is ass Sunday okay I've never had anyone like a mid-summer night sex

comedy featuring the ass of Dayton Reigns and that's called bottom oh I forgot the name of the character that is the ass is bottom so now you get to know the Shakespeare that humor is a little subtle but not he gets to be the bottom you get my ass it's just the drawbacks of I am so where do you want to lick it off of all

my ass I know whether to take my panties or not how about a cheek oh it's fine it's your choice but I should probably point it towards this way well all right then that would mean you'd have to get over there yeah absolutely all right here we go you can get on your knees to take your communion all right my goodness

here we go okay so first you lick a spot so that the salt sticks are you nervous me no I've done my fair share of ass shots this is like Wednesday night there we go and we have the salt all right now I'm supposed to be watching my sodium you'll be all right this is a special occasion as you say it's a

religious occasion I can do the Hebrew prayer if you like he's got a he's got oh he does okay okay you didn't like the whole thing all right now now I'm gonna lay back on my for us so here you go I'm stronger than you think

which I feel good about cuz you just swallow you licked my ass and swallowed Ron Jeremy down your throat all in one night yeah I'm going to Disneyland we're in the Disneyland for adults and the doctor Susan Block show broadcasting live from the Noboville we are wrapping it up that's what I'm doing actually so it's

all right hi I'm Dr. Susan Block and I've just written a new book called the bonobo way inspired by my love for the make love not war great apes you know the ones who have a lot of sex in a bonobo sutra of positions including face to face but it's not just how bonobos have sex it's how they use sex to prevent

murder and war really they're the only great apes that have never been seen killing each other they practice what I call peace through pleasure with the females gently dominating the very happy very sexually satisfied males bonobos are special partly because they just are and partly because they're

very very close to us almost 99% genetically similar to us when it comes to being human even being humane bonobos can teach us so much which brings me to us and more specifically to you is your inner bonobo longing to swing free would you like to tap into the hot natural sex energy within you that you would so

you can better enjoy the pleasures in life and cope with the pain you know the pain and have more orgasmic organic sustainable sex who doesn't want that greater lust greater trust and better anger management and who couldn't use a little bit of that these days so get the book learn the bonobo way you'll

be glad you did then you'll want to join bonoboville a new global village for bonobo lovers and friends and one last thing the real bonobos are highly endangered so a portion of all book sales go to bonobo conservation groups working to save the wild bonobos from extinction read the bonobo way and

learn why this could be the most important eco sexual movement of our times and improve your love life sisters we are going to have a civilian ride so you've never been on a civilian before no I've never been on one before okay now you are ready to ascend the throne Mr. Tracy you are going

to ride God's machine right here with the other right here and just position yourself comfortably put your clip right here here she goes have you ever ridden a civilian by the way oh I have many a time my favorite horse to

ride have civilian yoga and experience it to the fullest go for the G-spot go for the clip go for whatever we're going to ride in the civilian

holy shit that does the job yeah it's doing it strikes again yes I do say that when it feels good live on Dr. Suzy dot TV from the womb room in bonoboville ride them cowboy take a deep breath deep breath we never get tired of watching a pretty girl on the city and celebrate

masturbation I think we have orgasm Houston defy sister Kenny testify that you masturbate and you are not ashamed how was it what's your report oh my vagina's so tingly right now I feel like pop rock I'm

just gonna take this little body that is the best product endorsement I've ever seen can I leave now like I'm ready we got the city and you don't need the husband hey darling girl that's my girl listening to radio Suzy one on the

worldwide web real pussy where'd my pussy go maybe she went to clean herself up oh yeah she's gonna do a trick Dayton Reigns she has a very talented pussy as a matter of fact keeping with the theme we have a theme of ass and pussy because of course our other guests Jason Hadley at a very impressionable age this vulva

puppet made quite an impression on him and where's your microphone can we say you know try it again no no it's whoops there we go oh yes so there we go at a very impressionable age this vulva puppet made quite an impression on you yeah absolutely never forgot it and that's why you have the girlfriend you have

today yeah well one of the reasons yeah I want to take some credit I shout your name when she orgasms I'm sure she appreciates she probably shouts my name too we do it in unison we like to go round robin I'm like Dr. Susan and she's Dr. Susan you know yeah you know I'm proud of the fact even though the show is

for adults only you know sometimes there are youngsters that watch and it's a positive show it's a sex educational show but it's the Montessori method of sex education isn't that right Captain Max that is correct that is correct yes and the Montessori method a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down you know make

sex fun make it a comedy because it mostly is anyway and the tragedy part is you know something to you know get in there practice safer sex you know please practice your banana speaking of bananas I'm gonna take my condom off of my banana no you broke the

last I know what's just because I'm too sexual is that what it is that's what you say to the guys dicks you break I know I break their dicks because she is the winner of the most talented twat award yeah yeah we should we should give it to you like this see I have a very talented the most talented twat award is

presented right now to miss Dayton Reigns thank you so much the Susie award for 2015 most talented twat here we go I appreciate it thank you Dr. Susie thank you Captain Max thank you to all my fellow bonobos who helped me become the most talented twat I didn't realize you should be on a show called America's

twat yeah right we should have a show like that we should have a show America's twat talent that's good I'm thinking something along the lines of you know ping-pong balls yeah not just for distance but for accuracy I could do that too we have dildos I mean yeah I mean we have alcohol and and of course she's done

a cigar I've done a cigar right maybe could I think I'm gonna fight I have some medical award I I could demonstrate if you'd like we're gonna do that oh okay because I have I just want to introduce somebody who's in the audience oh who's I'm just glad to see she's she's in the audience and she's a beautiful young lady

who used to be a bonobo villain I mean she's still a bonobo villain in you know kind of in the field so to speak and it's come on up here here sit down yeah sit on the bed and let's give you a microphone yeah and my goodness you are dressed my goodness yeah hi talking to my yes it's cold outside now you are

inside yes can I take your jacket off for you we're not we're not we're all right here that is that is my life drink while something exciting is going on oh no this is kind of exciting we'll just open it a little bit yeah now be careful because we already have a reputation of getting girls drunk oh you're very conservative

okay you know yes then we'll leave it there I know okay all right well since you're so conservative you can hold your own microphone and guess what she's gonna move in with another one of our bonobos no yes really I bet you can't guess which one no I couldn't you couldn't right who Abe is gonna be impressed with this who

Briana Brea Briana Briana remember Briana one of our therapists who also kind of yeah yeah yeah hey wow so you're gonna so Briana she's still with her kind of check boyfriend or husband I got married you got to put the microphone on her husband I don't I keep very much appraise of her being on the show,

but we won't tell her that we mentioned her tonight. We'll just say how much we love her. Hey, Brianna! Hi, Brianna!

Love you! Be in Vegas soon. Yeah, yeah, oh, you went, yeah. Put on some headsets and that way you'll know when you're on.

Yeah, you look beautiful. I'm watching you actually on the internet here. OK. Hi, internet.

Hi. So, OK, so you're moving to Vegas, the land of the porn stars now. I hear it's like kind of girl-friendly.

Girl-friendly? Yeah, I'm excited to be there. And what is your goal when you're there? To be honest, just live in Vegas and work in Vegas.

That's pretty much my goal. No, when you're this beautiful, that can be your goal. It doesn't really matter what else you do. You just live and be.

It's very bonobo. It's like be, live, and just see what happens. And I'm sure good things will happen to you because you're just a magnet.

She looks great. I'm watching her on the screen here. I'm filming self-flushing right now. A little bit.

That's a little bit of a magnet in and of itself. Yeah, it looks like an orgasm, but not. Yeah, but not, not at all. Yeah, I don't look nervous.

I feel like a little bit of a bad student, though, because I didn't read enough about your book before I came in. About my book?

Yes. You should read all the great reviews. Oh, I should read every book. Yeah, over 35 stars review reviews on Amazon.

Congratulations. But you know, since you didn't read it, you need to get a books banking. Oh, I do.

Yes, you do. Here, would you like me to hold your drink? Yes, please. What is this kind of drink anyway?

Fireballs. This is the apple juice. It's not even so juic-fireballs. It's a real fireball.

Over the knee? I'm going to taste it. Oh, I get it. It's stinking on the knee.

Over my knee. Over my knee. I'm not very good at this. That's OK.

I need to learn from story stuff. You don't need to basically put it at it. I can tell you're conservative because you keep pulling the microphone away.

Like, you don't want it too close. Like, oh, get this thing away from me. It's very phallic. So you're going to put your head in my crotch,

and you're going to put your ass right here under Dr. Suzy's tits, and then we're going to spank you. You know, the way you put it could be very, very intimidating. Oh, it's fun.

She likes it. You're just getting over the knee. I can tell she likes it by the look in her eye. Here we go.

Over the knee. Very conservative. Don't be scared. She's totally covered.

OK, but down a little. My back is so flexible, though. OK, here we go. And naughty, naughty, Hannah.

Not reading the book. It kind of feels good, I must say. Either get well-read or get well-read. And when you take off your pants,

you're going to be getting a book spanking. Red. Hannah, you look beautiful. Hannah, you're gorgeous.

I want to get spanked again, but I promise I'll read your book. OK, good. So I understand you come with a man of mystery tonight.

I did. And that man is Jack Zippo. But this microphone doesn't work back here. Do we have another one?

Well, hold on. I could give him a mask. Whoops. No, I just fell apart.

No, don't worry about that. Yeah. We need a microphone. And here's a microphone.

Does it go all the way back there? We'll see. So I didn't spank you that hard. OK, give me a pass.

Pass through. Oh, that's all I want to go. A bulb of puppet or a Susie award. You got to get on that side.

The award. Oh, you have to earn it. That's true. What do you think you'd get an award for?

Well, I don't know. Camera people don't shoot here. I'm not there yet. Right.

But I think that's what I want. Don't shoot him. Yes. I'm happy to be sitting on the bed right now.

Did you notice the condom halo here? That's nice. Hey, Doc. They gave me a mic.

Jack. Happy second year of the Bonobo. Oh, likewise. Yeah.

Yeah. Nice to see you. So welcome back to Bonoboville and the womb room. It's lovely in here.

And the womb of the vulva puppet is getting a lot of play tonight. It's very interesting and exciting in here tonight. Oh, there's that accent.

You go in and out of it. Drifting in and out of it. Yeah. It's a little hat.

So what's new in Jack the Zipperville? I'm really surprised. HR's on your couch with you. Why are you surprised?

Because she doesn't do shows. She hasn't done any shows. And how many books banking has she done lately? How many books banking has she been booked on?

I don't know. I'm just I love it. It's surreal to see the three of you sitting there. It's surreal to see.

Yes. Love it. Yeah. Well, I feel at home.

Yeah. You are at home. Thank you. You are.

You're definitely one of my girls. The prodigal daughter comes home. Yes. Yes, indeed.

And you're just glowing. And you look beautiful. And you have engaging eyes and a pretty smile. So you feel good.

Thank you. All right. And she's on a Pirate's holiday. Yeah.

Would you like to take Bonoboville Communion? I would love to. OK. Let's prepare.

Would you like Agua Coco-Leaf-the-Cur or Rond on your throat? Ooh. I mean, I love. Oh my god.

I'm sorry, Rond Jeremy. I don't mean to be offensive, but I'm going to have to go with the green. That's good.

Rond has a green. It's a green show. It's a Bonobo show. We're getting ready for bringing the Bonobo way to Puerto Rico.

And by the way, I'm not sure if I want to call it El Camino del Bonobo or La Manera de Bonobo. I don't know if I'm pronouncing either one. What?

The way of the Bonobo. It's both the way of the Bonobo in Spanish, right? And so which is better? One is more like the manner of the Bonobo,

and the other is more like the path. The Camino is more like the road. Camino. El Camino del Bonobo.

El Camino. Right. I say El Camino del Bonobo. OK, Ryan's too.

OK, sorry, Abe. He liked La Manera de Bonobo. But anyway. Unseen Abe.

El Camino del Bonobo. And the Camino of choice is Agua. All right. And of course Agua has provided my leaves tonight.

And we're very excited about Agua. Hopefully I get laid. Would you like to take it off of some part of Dayton since she's available?

She's like the altar girl. I'm OK with that. Yeah, you can choose your part. What part?

Yeah, can you choose my part? Well, I would say her nipples. OK, your nipples. Oh.

All right. Yay! I'll get down on the ground. OK.

Get down on the ground. Go ahead. I'll be busy vicariously running through you. OK, so I am going to or do whatever you want.

Here we go. And yes. So first you, what religion did you grow up with? I grew up Catholic.

Catholic. OK. Well, this is a very Catholic ritual, although a Jewish guy just did it.

It was great. Yeah, no complaints. It actually goes with any religion, but communion is a Catholic tradition, the word communion,

and having an altar. And of course, we have the body and. That's kosher salt. The green blood.

Right. Oh, there's the green blood over there. Yeah, the green. Ghostly blood.

I think I'm a virgin to this, isn't there a body shot? Uh-huh. OK, this is a body shot. That's basically what it is, except we give it some light.

Oh my goodness. I'm her first body shot. Yeah. Be gentle.

Oh, you're going to like it. Be gentle. I'll make it nice. OK, she's going to make it nice.

I'm going to hold the mic. OK, so you get down on the ground with Dayton, and you lick her nipple, one of them. Whichever one.

Oh. Yeah, you lick it first to make it wet. Squeeze it and lick it. Because women need to be wet for any kind of sexual act

almost, including Benevolent Communion. Oh, yeah. Do you hear that, lads? No.

Yeah, they're real expensive. Yes, yes. I hope you're not on a low-salt diet like Jason here. If they're in your hand, they're real to you.

They're everything. OK, I got an aspirin. OK. Squeeze it.

Hannah, goodness. They're very squeezable, like Charmin. OK, yes. Wait, let me.

OK, so you've got the salt there, so I can move this over here. And OK. Is that comfortable for you? What?

OK. I think you're being incredibly supportive right now. She loves being uncomfortable. You should see when she's going to smoke the joint

through her pussy. I'm going to smoke the joint out of my pussy in a minute. You can touch me anytime you want. I love ladies.

OK. My roommate's cool. OK, I'll hold the mic. They feel really nice.

Yeah, they feel really nice. Good. They're nice boobies. Yeah, they're nice boobies.

All right, I'm glad I'm giving you a nice six. How are you enjoying this, Jack? What? Don't be embarrassed.

That's OK. My friends are cool. My roommate's cool. My pirate's holiday.

Yeah, pirate's holiday. We've been on a pirate's holiday for two weeks. What is a pirate's holiday? She's been camping at Mohass.

Yeah, so we just took a pirate's vacation. Because she decided to fuck off and move to Vegas. Well, you know, I'm a little scared of pirates, because the captain's the ship.

Don't hijack our ship. But you've got boobs here, so maybe we can ransom our ship. Yeah, what the fuck are we talking about? Yeah, you want to take your glove off and reveal it?

There's many things. OK, but you're getting salt all over your hands. There you go. Now there's no salt on your gloves.

No, that's good. Yeah, salt on your gloves. Oh, that's better. Are they warm?

They're even better. Wow. My hands are so sweaty I don't know. Yeah, they're warm.

They're not sweaty. My boobs only heat up to the room temperature. OK, just a little bit cold. Oh, I'd love to see Hannah get so excited.

It's fessing some tonight. Yes, one lick of this one with the salt. I'm going to have to go behind the bar. And now, yeah, you get the salt.

Now you lay back on me and rest your head in between my boobs, and I pour this down your throat. How about that? OK.

OK, I'll be nice, OK? Yeah, she could be mean. Be gentle? But not really.

But she won't be too pretty. Because you're too pretty. Just girl, girl, mafia, shit, you're in. I don't know, was she mean to you, Jason?

I felt I learned, and she was gentle. Oh, she was. You must have been pretty. I'm going to write a very favorable yell

preview about this. Are you ready? And I'll go really nice and slow. There she goes down the hatch, Agua.

Cocoa leaf liquor. Mm, she has a nice hue. Oh, look at that tongue come out, just like eating a snake. Nice.

Whoa. Ah, beautiful. Mm, oh, that kiss was extra. Yeah.

Whoa. Whoa. Mm. Cocoa mafia, I mean.

That's a lot. What was that? It's going to go mafia. All right, let's hear it for Hannah.

Wow. And Dayton Reigns. Are you OK? Are you uncomfortable?

Mm. Mm. There's as many kisses as you want. Very beautiful.

Be careful, our reputation is already bad. Oh. Book spanking at, no, put them on. You're going to sit over to the side now.

OK. And let's see. We're going to have Dayton in the middle. Maybe I should get over here, though,

because my mic is on this side. And so, let's see. I think we're ready for a little... After hours.

Cannabis. I have it already. Yeah. It's prepared right here.

It's medicinal, of course. And it is... OK. What are we doing?

We're doing... Well, this is what I've promised my audience, which is a performance of the most talented twat award winner.

Ah, yes. The winner. So you're going to sit a little farther, so she can be in the middle of us.

Yeah. We'll have her award over here. You want to grab that for me? And, yeah, we're just maneuvering around,

for those of you in the cheap seats, just listening to Radio Susie 1. I would certainly advise you to watch us on DrSusie.tv

or you can still be in the cheap seats and watch us if you join. Bonoboville.com. You guys can talk to me any night

from 2...any morning from 2 a.m. to 6 a.m. on Bonoboville. Otherwise, you'll fall asleep, so... Yeah, I'll fall asleep.

You don't want me sleeping when I can do all these talented tricks also. Don't forget that you can call us for any kind of therapy.

Not paternal women at all. Yes. We have special therapy. Banana licking.

Release your inner Bonobo. And talk about whatever you need to talk about that you can't talk about with anyone else.

You can talk to us. Okay, are you ready? I am ready, I think. Let's see, we have to remove the panties.

Right. Now, are you okay with her becoming now she's going to transform herself into the goddess Venus Cannabis?

Yeah, absolutely. I have no problem with this whatsoever. We're square with that. Alright, I just want to make sure

everyone's uncomfortable at the same time. We don't want to make anyone uncomfortable, of course. Sometimes there's a comfort in being uncomfortable, right?

Well... I need a lighter. There's a rousal in GMOs. I need a lighter.

Lighter. I have just the one. You know, Gonzo's always got a lighter. But we can't show Jack the zipper.

No. Throw it at me. He has to throw it at you. And it's silver and sparkly.

I want that back. That just hit her altar. Okay. You know, Johnny Depp tried to steal that lighter

from Charlotte Stokely. It's glittery. I got the Johnny Depp Charlotte Stokely lighter story to go with that lighter.

Oh, Charlotte Stokely. We don't care about Johnny Depp. Charlotte Stokely. We're very excited about Charlotte.

Well, she was over at his house and he and his wife were cooking dinner. Yeah. And Johnny's job was to sit on the couch

and roll blunts with the girls. That's a good job for Johnny. I had given that lighter to Charlotte. This is Charlotte's lighter.

It's like a disco lighter from this Tokyo. So they're hard to find. I gave her one because she smokes. And all night,

Johnny was, hey, Charlotte's a nice lighter you got there, you know. So anyway, he tried to steal it. He tried.

She stole it back. So this is the lighter that Johnny Depp almost stole from Charlotte Stokely? She swiped it back, got one of his shirts.

I saw this flannel shirt. And how did you get the lighter back? She gave it back to you? She also got a gang of weed from Johnny.

Wow. That tasted like honey maple syrup pancakes. Ooh. I smoked a lot of it.

That's who stole my weed. Nice. I got to smoke a ton of it. I was calling it Honey Depp.

Honey Depp. It was good. We want to have Honey Depp on the show. We want to have Charlotte back.

But we would have Johnny. That would be great. Just say hi to her. So I'm hoping that Mr.

Jack the zipper will try a hit out of my my twat of the

Well, we could put a mask on him. Right. I have lots of masks. I have a gas mask. We have these Agua masks.

The Agua mask might work. Where'd he go? He's gone. Who? Jack? Where'd he go?

He's hiding. Okay. Bye Jack. Whenever you're ready, I just need to start it with my mouth. Or you can start it with your mouth.

Or you can start it with your mouth. I don't know how this goes. So you just light a joint. Okay.

How does it work? How does the Gracie to our George Burns over here How?

How? How do I smoke? You'll see. You don't have to do it unless you really want to.

You don't have to smoke a joint with your pussy. Yeah. You probably don't know how. Maybe you do. I'm going to teach you.

I don't know how. Okay. Here we go. We're going to do it. I'm going to do it. So you light it. And then I'll spark it and blow smoke.

And then whoever wants a hit, please come up. Luscious Hannah Lips. She is so sexy.

She's just glowing. Can't we just have sex with you? Oh, sorry. There's my bad dreams.

Here we go. You got to get it going. You got to hit that shit. There you go. Perfect.

Do you want to hit it first, too? As well before. It's off. 420 Friendly.

Marijuana. Marijuana, man. Thank you, High Times. You know, this is a great thing.

I saw a joke, speaking of comedy, that Jimmy Carter was actually saying

that he smoked pot to handle his cancer and that it's in remission. And it was just a joke,

but I think it's that so many people, listen to me, I sound like I have cancer. That's just what a smoker's called breathing.

Well, now I'm afraid, like, wow, this is some strong shit. So once I smoke this, we're going to give a hit to Jason

because he's going to take one from your twat. Right, so I'm going to you hit it one more time. Here you go.

One more hit to spark it a little bit and then I'm going to insert it. Do you want to hold my leg up? Yeah.

One second. That's good. There we go. Is this something you should I mean, shouldn't get too short, right?

We don't want to strangle you here. Just have Jesus right there. Oh, you're lipping the joint. Whoa, that was quite a puff.

Whoa. Wait a second. Okay, who's ready for their hit? Hurry it up.

It's coming out. Jason Hadley is coming in for his hit. Okay, open up the camera. Whoa.

There you go. I'll hold the mic. Are you ready? This has never been done before.

This is insane. Take your hit for him. No, we've done it before, but not with him. I was going to say.

Not with Jason Hadley. Oh, he's puffing out of the puffer. Did you get some? I think she has to do it again.

There we go. Whoa. Did I shoot it out? You did.

Okay, did you take it in? I'm the one that's getting higher than everyone else. Did you get high that one? Oh, yeah.

I mean, I tend to do it through my cannabally coconut oil infused with cannabis. You rub it on that. There she goes.

Now it's your chance. Take it. Oh, yeah. You hear that cough, brothers and sisters.

That is the cough of congestion. Does anyone else want to begin? I'm so glad my doctor recommended this. Does anyone else want to try

why I'm doing this? Everyone else has an opportunity if they want to try. How about you? I'm going to have to pass.

I don't mean to be rude. No, that's fine. You can pass. You're missing out.

Anybody else in the audience? You did do communion, so we're appreciative of that. Well, I guess I will. You know.

Can you hold her leg? Thank you. I'm doing this for the green cross. I'm a producer and I got this on the show.

I'll be so ecstatic. Yes, the green cross. Yeah, I believe in it. I think it helps a lot of people

with cancer, with other conditions. I have some kind of condition. Mmm. Pussy mixed with cannabis.

What was that flavor, Jack? This one, I think we should... Honeydip. Honeydip.

This is the depths of honey. This is the real honeydip. Yeah, this certainly is. Oh, whoops.

Did that go up there? Yeah, I got it. Well, I guess we're going to have to applaud for this day, Grace.

I mean, would our guest... Thank you. Does anyone else want to try? Would you like a try? Okay, let me just get the filter back in.

Okay, I think... Would you like a try, sir? Please, come on to the stage. I highly recommend it.

Okay, one moment. Maybe you can help get that back in there. Been in the old Bonobo Vils that we've called also Dr. Suzy Speakeasy,

when we were in the soul of downtown L.A. in a few different locations, including our famous Pico residence, where the movie Speakeasy was shot

that is hopefully going to be edited and presented to the world. Yeah, come forward. I don't know if you want to use...

What's your name? I got your drink. You want a mic? Is it right?

Okay, give me a name that we use. Howdy. Is that your name? Jonathan.

Alright, ready? Alright. He is ready for his communion. Alright.

Here, we're doing it right here. You get down. Direct from Bonobo Vils. And you worship at the most talented

Twat Award winner of the Suzy Awards for 2015. We're now into 2016. And Dayton Reigns

is the goddess Venus Cannabis. I'm not sure if she's the goddess Venus Sativa

or Indica. You got a good blast there. Damn. Isn't it amazing? Pussy mixed with cannabis.

It's a new flavor. They should make this. I don't know if they'd want to have dick mixed with cannabis. What am I talking about?

I don't even have a joint in my hand. Probably do well with... I hate to say this. It's probably very politically incorrect.

But I will say the gay crowd. I don't know if women want to smoke cannabis that smells like sperm. But I know guys

want to smoke cannabis that has the hint of puse, you know? Oh, to puse. Right? Yeah.

And it looks like you're signaling. My penis knows how to smoke. Your penis knows how to smoke. You know, Max, we've been together a long time.

It gets you really high though. So I have to denounce my Twat talent. Yeah.

Real high. That's awesome. Now, we're back to the ass discussion. Back to the ass discussion.

I could probably say you're smoking out of my ass. Man's pussy is his ass. True. It's got a prostate.

Prostate is up there. The pea spot, exactly. That's some good stuff, right? I mean, I've had a visitor there, too, in my day.

I knew it. I mean, after all, you're into pregnant lesbians. Come on, you're going to have your pea spots. It's just another color in the porno rainbow.

Exactly. It's a good color. Don't be ashamed to have your pea spots stimulated. Right?

Did you ever stimulate a man's pea spot? Oh, a pea spot? Yeah. Actually, yes. He wouldn't be so happy, but whatever.

He wouldn't be happy, maybe if you said his name. Probably. Other than guys like Jason, it embarrasses some guys.

But some guys, you know, a lot of guys like it. Yeah. It's interesting, because girls don't have

the same spot, but yet a guy does, and that's just interesting. Well, we have a sensitive sphincter. But we just don't have a prostate.

Neither do I. That's true at this point, honey. They took it. They did take it.

And thank goddess that that's all they took to get rid of the nasty cancer man. Well, they took something else. Well, they did take the other thing.

They took a few things. But, you know, they left the important parts. Oh, yeah, that's important. And your orgasms are kind of better

than ever in a way. I just want to say that. That's really interesting, because I was really terrified about this.

They took my bladder out. Then they cut my intestines. And then the doctors there are sewing the new bladder.

Like they're in a factory or something. My heart is stopped. We don't understand how this works

with the needle and thread. Well, it's not stopped. They do it on purpose. They stop the heart so they can do

this incredible 17-hour operation. It's crazy, right? So then your bladder, your intestine becomes

your bladder. Now, it doesn't know that it's a bladder. Not yet. It's learning.

It's been working as an intestine. So it doesn't know like, I got to go to the bathroom. I got to wear diapers again now.

So diapers. I got over it. Absolutely. Here's the deal.

I can come ten times a night. Yeah, he's in touch with his orgasmic abilities. I have to say, like a woman

has orgasms without ejaculation because, of course, you need the prostate for ejaculation. And I feel like

the sperm shooting through my balls, you know, outside. He does. I don't have to clean anything up.

No must, no fuss, which is kind of cool. I mean, nothing against the sperm fetish is out there. Your socks must thank you.

But it's true. It's amazing. It's fun. It's fun.

If you have your bladder removed and your prostate, it's okay. It's not the end of the world. It's definitely not.

The cancer looks great and you look great. I feel great. I'll just throw away all my medicines.

Oh, that's awesome too. I'm just healing myself. I've never felt better. Sex.

Because the stuff they were giving me was like, your kidneys are dying. Why are they? Because you're taking these medicines

so we're going to give you medicines? No. And he is smoking more marijuana. And I'm smoking more marijuana.

A little less alcohol, more cannabis. Back to my hippie days. I've stoned most of the day. Nothing against alcohol,

but it's kind of strong. Oh, yeah. Oh, look at that. Thank you very much.

You earned it. There you go. Captain Max. Let's have a hand for Captain Max.

Sailing through the big sea. Sailing through the big sea. I haven't had a sail recently.

It's pretty fun. Remember, we went out. It was a weird day. We went sailing.

It was like a birthday or Valentine's Day or some kind of crazy thing. But we went with Hannah on a boat.

On the ocean. On a gondola. On the gondola. I hope you enjoyed your time.

We enjoyed it. The canal of Long Beach. Yes. What happens when you have your birthday

on a Monday? You just had a birthday party on a Saturday. Oh.

Where'd you go? I'm sorry, I missed that birthday. But I'm thinking of Charlotte Stokely. No, you didn't miss that birthday.

The one where you brought out the cake. Charlotte was at the green horse. That was our anniversary. This is getting to be very gossipy.

And actually, we should shout out what Jason here does. He does a kind of a gossipy show. I do. I do the Hollywood Rock and Wrap Up.

It's basically a comedy take on celebrity gossip news. So I kind of think the daily show of gossip news, if you will.

It's a one minute segment. It airs on about 60 different affiliates around the country. I love doing it.

I comb through the TMZs and the Hollywood gossip sites. Just take what's newsworthy and turn it into a joke.

Turn it on its ear. Point out the absurdity of it. Or, you know, just throw shade. You know how to spell my name, right?

I don't want to make fun. I just want to point out there's some glitter in your beard and I'm really happy about it. Yeah, it looks good.

It's custom work. I was actually on MTV's Pimp My Beard. Oh, safe. Your girlfriend is as happy about the glitter.

We should have her. I'll tell her I ate a birthday clown. She can watch it in Bonoboville. It'll still be playing.

We'll have a rerun of it, I think. Yeah. Celebrities. We'll have to have you back to make fun of

some of our favorite celebrities. I love to. I think we're way out of time. What are we doing?

The birthday girl is not here yet. We're probably going to just wind her up.

So. Let's see. Hey, Jason. What over here?

I'm invited back. The lovely girls. Yes, indeed. What happened to our other girl?

She's probably fixing her towel to twine. I feel like the meat in a sexy sandwich. Keep in mind that she just did a whole

smoky performance. Maybe she's applying barbecue sauce. I don't know. Never mind.

Everyone is passing the joint that Dayton's pussy was in. Around. I just want to let you all know.

I don't care who's pussy. It's been marinated. Just so we no one accuses me later.

Yes. Of not telling. I have told. But you all saw it. Yes.

Yes, indeed. The Dr. Susan brought block. It's a hell of a show.

Hell of a show tonight. She's been on the air since 1984. Right after I met her.

Right after I got out of prison. I love your story. To be more gossipy. I didn't do any

just for obscenity. Actually for conspiracy. They never got me for obscenity. Were you faking the moon landing?

Lack of censorship. I think that's what happened. Censorship is a different story now. You know what?

Well, you were basically arrested and imprisoned for lack of self-censorship. That's correct.

That's the best way of putting it. I lacked in my own censorship. Right. That was my failure.

Because they hadn't gotten the laws on the books yet? You know what it is. If you make a film

with faking in it. By the way, Max, you're lit phenomenally well right now. Oh, thank you. It's all those

ejaculation-less orgasms. Yes, I think it is. That's a thing. What was I talking about?

I don't know. You get arrested if somebody's watching your movie and it incites them

to masturbate. If you're a panographer. Just that. Just masturbate. Just masturbate.

If you masturbate to a major motion picture, they don't go and arrest them. Not even masturbate in Macy's store window. Just masturbate by itself.

That's not fair. Really? Well anyway, now people self-censor themselves because

Facebook will kick you off. These are capitalist fascists. You're working on their land.

Basically. They can kick you off anytime you want. That's right. Nothing but sharecroppers.

No, we're going to nationalize them. We're going to turn them into a phone company. We accept refugees in Bonoboville,

but you've got to behave yourself. I'm sorry to say, but nothing like what happened in Cologne. Please, again, okay,

we want to be open to you refugees here in Bonoboville. Yeah. It's a rough situation and I have to say

it's because of, you know, US and European invasion and bombing. You know, most of these places were colonies

to the old empires. Yeah. Now we're an empire. We have troops

in 160 somewhat countries. Now we are reaping what we sow to go back to our biblical theme and so we have to be Bonobos.

We have to. We could go the other way. Where is Donald Trump? This is not the idiot in Texas.

We keep him over here by the back of the chair. I like that you could just enter anyone's eyes in there.

That's a great smile. That's a good smile. We could all be Donald Trump. She cut the mouth hole out too.

Here? I think it was something that we did for Halloween or...

That's a really nice smile for Donald Trump. Isn't it? He does.

How do you look as Donald Trump? I heard he's running for president. I heard he's running for president. I'm sorry.

Do you have a campaign speech? I would say I will buy your vote for the low price

of $9.99 no negotiating. You're fired. All right.

We are out of time. I think we're being fired. Out of time. I think I'm going to see you all

in Puerto Rico. El Camino de Bonobo. What is this mask here? There's another mask.

Wait a second. I'm sorry, but where'd this come from? Speaking of

our grizzly atoms and all of the wild... We have a wild animal. Is that like a lion?

I think they got that off the MGM Grand, right? Yeah, wow. Who's this? Kavi?

You've got to talk in a microphone, though, if you're going to talk. Okay, you brought it for Dayton to put on

while she arches her back? Where is Dayton? She's probably, you know, putting salve on her

talented twat. She's going to put that cat mask on and smoke catnip out of her vagina. I think that was the plan.

Okay, I'm still not sure what is going on. So keep rolling. Can I see the mask?

I like that picture, by the way. Christy, shoot a close-up of that one. Oh, that's me as a Bonobo. That was done by another

Susie Award winner, Helene. So I think we're just about done because we only have 90 seconds.

So where do we find you? You can find me on Twitter at Comedienne J. Hadley as well as the Hollywood Rock & Rap Up

at Rock & Rap Up. And where do we find you, Hannah? Probably in the Shadows with Jack the Zipper.

Jay Hadley. Lionhead, mate. You have some sort of page somewhere.

Photo op, mate. So join us in Puerto Rico and... The Lovely Dayton Rains.

There is the Lovely Dayton Rains. What happened here? Put the lionhead... I guess, I don't know.

We got a lion mask. Let's... Put it on a comic. We only had like 60 seconds now.

Okay, so... Yeah. So rest in pleasure, Dan Haggerty, Grizzly Adams.

We're all animal over you. And David Bowie as well. I can't believe I didn't say David Bowie.

And my cousin, Jeff Block, also cancer, all three cancer. My cousin, Jeff Block. Always try to take the last bus out.

What does that mean? Don't go early. So sad. I'm so glad we could spend this time together.

So, yeah, let's cherish those moments we spend with each other because you never know when someone you love will be taken from you.

You just don't know. So make like bonobos, not baboons, make love, not war, make love to someone you love tonight,

even if that someone is you. I love you. Yeah. See the clap sign.

That was good. To talk with someone about something you can't talk about with anyone else, you can talk to us.

I'm Dr. Susan Block, your mistress of the airwaves. But my day job is director of the Dr. Susan Block Institute

for the Erotic Arts and Sciences, specializing in sex therapy over the phone. Anytime you need to talk,

whether you need serious psychotherapy or a hot phone sex experience or a combination, my world-renowned telephone sex therapists

are just a phone call away. Totally private, absolutely confidential. We listen, talk with you, advise you, role-play for you,

fantasize with you. No fantasy is too taboo and help you with anything from impotence to exhibitionism,

fears to desires, fetishes to marriages. For more information, call us at 213-291-9497.

That's 213-291-9497. Anytime you need to talk. We're listening to radio sooty 1 on the World Wide Web.