What do you get when the first Saturday night of Masturbation Month happens to fall on Cinco de Mayo? Orgasms—por todo del mes! Sí, hermanos y hermanas, we are all in the holiday spirit in the Womb Room—especially when it cums to masturbating. And this fiesta is overflowing with a multi-cultural, multi-orgasmic whammy of celebrations with a heady helping of education, as we kick off Masturbation Month on Cinco de Mayo with hot and humorous masturbation stories, a provocative report from an SFU researcher on masturbation and media, a record number of on-show Sybian rides, a spanking hot birthday bash, oodles of tickling and teasing from some of the prettiest gals on the planet, naughty anatomically correct piñatas, a fantastic foot fetish demo, climaxing with a sudden, spectacular fountaining fiesta of female ejaculation all over my Mexican Mother Mary towel. ¡Viva la Masturbación!

Air Date: 06/23/2012 “My Oberon, what visions have I seen! Methought I was enamored of an ass…” Faerie Queen Titania in A Midsummer Night’s Dream by William Shakespeare, Act 4, Scene 1 Enter the Enchanted Forest of my Womb Room, and you’ll discover just “what fools these mortals be” during this honeymoon hot and wild Commedia Erotica performance of A Midsummer Night’s Wet Dream. Shakespeare might be shaken by our no-holds-barred eroticizing of one of his most brilliant comedies, but I think he’d also be amused, and I know he’d be aroused. In Shakespeare’s original Dream, the “ass” is a recurring theme. A central character is one “Nick Bottom,” and with a name like that, we already know he’s an ass. Then Puck turns Bottom into an actual ass, that is, a jackass or donkey, from the neck up. Though we might assume he’s also hung like a horse or at least a donkey, since there’s no other reason but magic juice that the beautiful Faerie Queen Titania falls in love with Bottom the Ass. Bottom is rather “rude,” but we’ve got an elegant Balinese wooden horse to “play” the ass, with a large, functional dildo “attachment” that turns it into a real “horsepowered” sex machine (Dick Bottom?), topped only by the human sex machine between the legs of one of our surprise guests who–surprise!–turns out to be hung bigger than the horse. We’ve also got a dazzling, dizzying array of awesome naked asses in a variety of colors, shapes and sizes, male, female and shemale)—adorning this unrehearsed megaproduction of the hottest, horniest, honey-moon-iest rendition of A Midsummer Night’s Dream you’ve ever seen. Shakespeare your schoolteacher never taught you (unless your schoolteacher is me). Special thanks to my show producer Tasia Sutor who claims not to “understand” Shakespeare, but proves herself to be a better, more ingenious Puck than Robin Goodfellow himself, magically transforming my broadcast bed into an Enchanted Forest, turning Master Liam’s wooden horse into a mythological sex machine, and then flying through the air with faerie wings (watch the after-party clips to witness the enchantment). Additional thanks to Pr. Max (whose revolutionary publications are now being featured in a fabulous 14-page spread in Richardson Magazine) and to the entire Bonobo Gang of merry fools for love and faerie wizards who make this madness possible.

Air Date: 6/23/2012 “My Oberon, what visions have I seen! Methought I was enamored of an ass…” Faerie Queen Titania in A Midsummer Night’s Dream by William Shakespeare, Act 4, Scene 1 Enter the Enchanted Forest of my Womb Room, and you’ll discover just “what fools these mortals be” during this honeymoon hot and wild Commedia Erotica performance of A Midsummer Night’s Wet Dream. Shakespeare might be shaken by our no-holds-barred eroticizing of one of his most brilliant comedies, but I think he’d also be amused, and I know he’d be aroused. In Shakespeare’s original Dream, the “ass” is a recurring theme. A central character is one “Nick Bottom,” and with a name like that, we already know he’s an ass. Then Puck turns Bottom into an actual ass, that is, a jackass or donkey, from the neck up. Though we might assume he’s also hung like a horse or at least a donkey, since there’s no other reason but magic juice that the beautiful Faerie Queen Titania falls in love with Bottom the Ass. Bottom is rather “rude,” but we’ve got an elegant Balinese wooden horse to “play” the ass, with a large, functional dildo “attachment” that turns it into a real “horsepowered” sex machine (Dick Bottom?), topped only by the human sex machine between the legs of one of our surprise guests who–surprise!–turns out to be hung bigger than the horse. We’ve also got a dazzling, dizzying array of awesome naked asses in a variety of colors, shapes and sizes, male, female and shemale)—adorning this unrehearsed megaproduction of the hottest, horniest, honey-moon-iest rendition of A Midsummer Night’s Dream you’ve ever seen. Shakespeare your schoolteacher never taught you (unless your schoolteacher is me). Special thanks to my show producer Tasia Sutor who claims not to “understand” Shakespeare, but proves herself to be a better, more ingenious Puck than Robin Goodfellow himself, magically transforming my broadcast bed into an Enchanted Forest, turning Master Liam’s wooden horse into a mythological sex machine, and then flying through the air with faerie wings (watch the after-party clips to witness the enchantment). Additional thanks to Pr. Max (whose revolutionary publications are now being featured in a fabulous 14-page spread in Richardson Magazine) and to the entire Bonobo Gang of merry fools for love and faerie wizards who make this madness possible.

Air Date: 06/09/2012 It’s another unforgettable orgy in the Womb Room. And what is the cause for celebration this time? To quote the sagacious inscription on the goblet I received as a gift: “It’s My Fucking Birthday!” And what a bon anniversaire bacchanal of epic proportions it is, commencing with me popping out of my own cake (concocted by RadioSUZY1 producer and passionate cake fetishist Tasia Sutor, assisted by artist Yossie Vardan), surrounded by some of the world’s hottest sexpots, sexperts and sex maniacs in full-on, ecstatic celebration mode. Then things really go off! And by “things” I mean most of my guests’ clothing as we pile up more beauties in the bed for Sybian rides, spanking, pole-dancing, Adult Play Parlor sex toys for all, Kinky Eddie sex toys for me, sword swallowing (both the sideshow and fellatio variety—at the same time!), as couples and clusters sex it up until the break of dawn on various beds and couches of the Speakeasy, in celebration of the very first “sex act” of my long and rather sexual life. Yes indeed, brothers and sisters, we are all born from sex. With all due respect to the Virgin Mother, real mothers are not virgins. Neither are fathers. Sex is what brings us into the world, and sex is what motivates us to stick around for a while. Praise be to the power and glory of sex! It keeps you young. And you keep me young. At least you—my readers, listeners, lovers, viewers, friends, clients, tweeps, my awesome, ever-changing socialist/capitalist BonoboVille community—keep me from ever growing up. The proof is in this party. Thank you all for helping to make my crazy marvelous life possible.

Air Date: 06/09/2012 It’s another unforgettable orgy in the Womb Room. And what is the cause for celebration this time? To quote the sagacious inscription on the goblet I received as a gift: “It’s My Fucking Birthday!” And what a bon anniversaire bacchanal of epic proportions it is, commencing with me popping out of my own cake (concocted by RadioSUZY1 producer and passionate cake fetishist Tasia Sutor, assisted by artist Yossie Vardan), surrounded by some of the world’s hottest sexpots, sexperts and sex maniacs in full-on, ecstatic celebration mode. Then things really go off! And by “things” I mean most of my guests’ clothing as we pile up more beauties in the bed for Sybian rides, spanking, pole-dancing, Adult Play Parlor sex toys for all, Kinky Eddie sex toys for me, sword swallowing (both the sideshow and fellatio variety—at the same time!), as couples and clusters sex it up until the break of dawn on various beds and couches of the Speakeasy, in celebration of the very first “sex act” of my long and rather sexual life. Yes indeed, brothers and sisters, we are all born from sex. With all due respect to the Virgin Mother, real mothers are not virgins. Neither are fathers. Sex is what brings us into the world, and sex is what motivates us to stick around for a while. Praise be to the power and glory of sex! It keeps you young. And you keep me young. At least you—my readers, listeners, lovers, viewers, friends, clients, tweeps, my awesome, ever-changing socialist/capitalist BonoboVille community—keep me from ever growing up. The proof is in this party. Thank you all for helping to make my crazy marvelous life possible.

Date: 12/24/2011 No A-list porn stars, best-selling authors or champion wrestlers on this one. No, for Xmas Eve & the 5th night of Hanukkah, we make it a “Family Show.” But when I say “family,” I don’t mean Focus on the Family (and I doubt they would approve); I mean our very own Speakeasy den of denizens, artists and multi-talented resident perverts—the Bonobo Gang. From high-stakes Hanukkah candle-racing to a Nativity scene presented with Divine Interventions dildos and a Baby Jesus butt plug, we honor the winter holiday traditions in our own heart-warmingly debauched way. I dress up as Dr. Suzy Claus in red bikini trimmed with white faux fur and a matching micro-mini garter skirt from Adult Play Parlor, and Tasia is my feral reindeer pulling in a bag of sex toys, also from Adult Play Parlor, with something for everyone in the Speakeasy family, almost all of whom are wearing Santa hats, like a platoon of depraved elves. After some impressively naughty Agwa salt licking and a fascinating lesson in the Saturnalian sexual history of Xmas–did you know that Santa Claus represents the penis coming down the chimney (which is the vagina)?–the show explodes in a beautiful Hitachi-propelled Orgasm for Peace on Earth, Pleasure for All. Amen…and Awomen!

Air Date: 12/03/2011 In our third live broadcast focused on Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality, the Womb Room explodes into a chasm of brain-gasms that lead to a daisy-chain of orgasms, male sword-swallowing (the most dangerous deep throating you’ve ever seen), squirting, fisting and then back to brain-gasms again. A sensational and provocative Commedia Erotica festival of sex & the discussion of sex—who says you can’t judge a book by its lover(s).

Air Date: 10/29/2011 Flying can be an aphrodisiac, and no, I don’t mean being felt up by TSA. Freud said flying dreams represent sexual desire. Others say romance and liberation. Think Superman squiring Lois Lane through the friendly skies without a plane. But actually flying, falling—or skydiving—while having sex mid-air would be a pretty hair-raising experience, even for the completely shaved….So, in the scary sex spirit of Halloween, we welcome some guests from the more daredevil, don’t-try-this-at-home end of the human sexuality spectrum, a porn star pair that put members of the Mile High Club to shame when they dropped over two miles from a plane while having sex doggystyle in nothing but their parachutes and birthday suits. A more grounded sort of thrill-seeking adventure lands on stage once the fishnets fall away and the Hitachi, the Monkey Rocker, my magic dildonic vibrating broom, my magic fingers and the American flag all get mounted in a valiant, diligent and ultimately triumphant effort to squirt. Since a few other scheduled guests had bailed at the last minute due to food poisoning (nasty Halloween candy?) and zombie attacks, we also draft a few colorfully costumed studio audience members into featured guest seats. Trick or parachute!